Return To Memory
by doctorrosetyler
Summary: Rose changes everything for him. She would give anything to take away his pain. She just doesn't know that all he wants is her. Ten/Rose
1. The Memory

Return To Memory

Chapter 1: The Memory

Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who.

Summary: Rose changes everything for him. She would give anything to take away his pain. She just doesn't know that all he wants is her. Ten/Rose

_His eyes, haunted by the loss he had just suffered, turned to her. His eighth incarnation stared into her eyes as tears rolled down his cheeks. His pain became hers as he pulled her to him. _

_Sobs racked her body, she relaxed against him. He straightened, breath calming and hearts slowing. She would bear this pain for him if it meant he could become the man she knew. He released her and before her stood her first Doctor, with goofy ears and a leather jacket. The same pain remained in his eyes- they were the piercing blue eyes she had known, but his hurt was no longer masked. She cried out as he changed before her eyes into her current Doctor. _

_She knew that this was the pain he hid from her. He hadn't healed since the Time War- he had just learned to hide it better so she wouldn't know how he was suffering. She reached out to him and he turned to look at his burning planet. _

_She woke. _

Rose shot up in bed, shaking from her nightmare. Her pink comforter was tossed on the ground and a cold sweat covered her body. She collapsed back into the pillows, tears still falling down her face.

Why was she having that dream? Over and over, she saw the pain in his eyes. It was beginning to affect her daily life.

Every time he looked at her, she found herself searching for that look in his eyes- tried to reassure herself that it was just a dream. How did she even know what his eighth body even looked like? She had never seen a picture of him before his ninth self. She was sure she had never seen his eyes like that before, so haunted and terrible. She wanted more than anything to know that the man she loved had healed from his wounds of loss.

She got up from her bed and went to the shower, hoping he wouldn't come in and see the sweaty sheets and smell her terror. He didn't know about the nightmares and she didn't want to tell him that it was _his_ pain that haunted her now. She knew he would pile more guilt on his already overburdened conscience.

After her shower she felt much better, as if the water and strawberry-scented soap had washed away the fear. She dressed quickly and headed to the kitchen for some breakfast.

He was there at the table they had gotten on a shopping planet. He had protested the domestic act of picking out a table together, but she won the argument. She had batted her eyes at him and told him that it was so uncomfortable to sit on those stools. She smiled at the memory, her dream fading slowly from her mind at seeing the smile on his face at her appearance.

"Good morning, starshine! The earth says hello!" he grinned over his tea.

She rolled her eyes, going to the toaster to make her breakfast. "If you keep ripping off _Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory_, someone is going to come after you."

He sipped his tea. "And how will they know. We're out here in the vortex, I can do it all I want and there will be no one to hear you complain." He said cheekily.

She sighed, smiling secretly behind her hair. "Now you just sound like a creeper."

He chuckled. "That was my intention. How did you sleep?"

She froze at the question. Did he know about her nightmares? Was she crying out in her sleep? It took her a second to figure out that his question had been completely innocent. These dreams were definitely starting to get to her. "Fine" she squeaked out. Smooth, Rose.

He didn't seem to notice, though. He was fiddling with a…part of some sort. The sonic screwdriver was whirring away as she finished making her tea and toast. He looked up for a moment when she sat down before going back to work.

"What's that?" she asked, taking a bite of her toast.

"I don't really know" he replied, pushing his glasses up his nose as he worked. Her heart warmed at his scruffy look. He was wearing his usual suit, with his hair in every direction. She didn't doubt that he'd been working at that part for the better part of the night. He probably hadn't slept, but he rarely did anyway. She didn't worry too much. It was only when he had dark circles under his eyes that she made him sleep. She knew he feared sleeping. He almost always dreamed of fire and death.

She shouldn't know that. But she did. The TARDIS told her.

She had a bit of a strange relationship with the ship. She didn't speak out loud to it, of course, but they had conversations of sorts. She would often find messages on the mirror in her bathroom after a shower, or notes on the console screen when the Doctor wasn't looking. She felt twinges in her mind, too. She suspected the TARDIS tried to speak to her telepathically, but she didn't have the capabilities to understand the messages. The Doctor did. He often held conversations with the ship. (She wasn't really supposed to know that either.)

It had been one night that she had found the Doctor under the console, crying out in his impromptu nap, that the TARDIS had told her. She had woken him from his slumber and seen the raw pain in his eyes as he came back to reality. He had allowed her to hold him as he caught his breath before standing up and disappearing into the infinite halls of the ship. She heard a beep from the console and glanced up at the monitor. She saw four words that made her heart wrench for him.

_He dreams of war_.

The clink of his cup against the table brought her back to the present. She sighed at her now soggy toast and cold tea before getting up and throwing them out.

"Are you ok?" the Doctor asked, concerned. She didn't have a chance to reply before he was in her face, running the sonic over her and asking her all sorts of questions….what her favorite animal had to do with her being sick was beyond her.

"I'm fine, Doctor." She said, pushing him away gently. "Just not hungry".

Which was true…sort of. She really just wasn't interested in eating when she was sure she had just glimpsed hidden pain in his eyes.

She didn't know that it was the thought of losing her that caused the pain…she just assumed it was the time war and filed it away in her mind for future torment. "So…where are we going today?"

He pushed his concern back and grinned. "You should go put on that dress you wore for the Julox Coronation. We're going to the Sacred Stone Palace of Korlok IV!"

She grinned back and headed to her room to change, packing a pair of trainers in her purse…just in case.

He didn't know what was up with her lately. She was tired, he could tell. There were dark circles under her eyes and she had gotten skinnier. He saw a weight in her eyes that shouldn't be there- she looked at him differently.

He knew she loved him, and if he said he didn't love her back he would be a liar. What worried him was the sorrow he saw in her every time she looked at him. It was like she was waiting for him to do something bad. He didn't know what she was expecting, but her eyes held a fear that he hadn't seen until recently. He was worried about her. He didn't want her to hurt on his behalf. He wanted to cause her joy, not suffering.

He hoped that this visit would change things.

He had no idea what fate had in store for them on that planet.

They stepped out of the TARDIS into the morning light. Rose gasped at the beauty of it, feeling the cool breeze ruffle her hair. The white dress she wore twirled around her ankles and the Doctor's warm hand held hers. "It's beautiful" she said.

The wooden door of the TARDIS closed behind them as they began to walk through the tall grass. All around them were trees of a deep purple color. The lush grass was a beautiful green color and among the blades nestled small red flowers. The blue sky was dotted with fluffy white clouds and the sun glittered through the leaves of the trees. In the distance, nestled in the regal mountains, was a white palace that glistened in the sun. The Doctor glanced at Rose, smiling and relaxed for the first time in weeks. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes sparkled with joy, small hums of contentment occasionally drifting from her lips. Her long dress bared her shoulders to his gaze and fit her waist before flowing smoothly down to her feet, on which she wore gold sandals. He stored her image in his mind, relieved to see her truly smile for the first time in what seemed like an eternity.

Rose felt his eyes on her and turned to him, surprised to see true happiness in his gaze. His mouth was turned up in a smile- not that manic 'I'm hiding things behind this' smile, but a beautiful, contented, smile. She didn't think she had seen him this happy in a long time. He wasn't faking it, either. She knew him well and there was no pain in his eyes this time. She walked a bit closer to his side and felt his hand slip from hers to wrap around her shoulders. Maybe her dreams were wrong. Maybe he really had healed from the loss of his people.

They walked for a long time, enjoying the morning weather and the beauty of the planet. She asked him if they were going to the palace in the distance and was met with a quiet smile. She knew from that smile alone that that was exactly where they were going.

"It's not actually a palace. It's a temple. See, the Korlokians moved to this planet about two thousand years ago. They were a terribly wasteful race and their old planet was dying, polluted beyond salvation. After seeing what they had done to their home, they decided to change their ways if they were given a second chance. I think I was in my seventh regeneration at the time, but I helped them move and taught them how to live without wasting their resources. This is the first time I've been back, and I have to say that I'm pleasantly surprised that how well they managed it!" There was a spring in his step and his fingers gently caressed her shoulder as they meandered through the trees, headed vaguely in the direction of the temple.

"What's all that got to do with it being a temple and not a palace?" she asked him teasingly.

He paused for a moment. "Right….weeeelll…sorry! Drifted a bit there. They believe that a goddess gave this new planet to them, and so the first thing they built was a temple to honor her. They call her Caliliana. They brought the last pure stone from their planet and placed it in the sun room of the temple so that she could live there as they inhabited and cared for her planet. Legend says that she has a heart for the unfortunate and the lonely and that she waits in the stone for the perfect wish."

"So…this goddess gives them a planet, and they expect her to be happy living in a rock?" she asked incredulously.

The Doctor laughed. "See, Rose? That's why I picked you! You always ask the right questions!"

She rolled her eyes. "So, we're not really here for the temple. Something's gone wrong? This Caliliana isn't really into living in a rock and now she's gone on a rampage?"

He looked at her, a feigned expression of hurt on his face. "No! Everything's fine here. No wars or anything. Just a nice, happy planet with happy people."

She looked at him skeptically, trying to gauge whether or not he was serious. When all she saw was eager happiness on his face, she accepted his answer and walked a little closer to his side. She loved times like these, where they were both so calm and happy and they could just…be together. Not that they were _together_. They continued through the lovely forest, enjoying the walk and the warm patches of sunlight that filtered through the trees.

She loved running, but sometimes it was nice to just walk.

After a long bit of comfortable silence, the Doctor wrapped his arm around her shoulders and brought her closer to his side. She relaxed into him, feeling content in his embrace. The question slipped out before she could stop it.

"Doctor, are you happy?"

His arm stiffened around her and she felt his breath hitch. Uh-oh. She really shouldn't have asked that. She waited, tensed for his answer. Soon she felt him relax, his breath leaving in a small sigh.

"Weeelll…yeah."

She looked up at him, shocked at his answer, especially because it took him so long to come up with it. He seemed a bit surprised at his own response. He continued before she could question him.

"When we met, I wasn't…I wasn't me. My planet had just been lost and I didn't know what to do. I was all alone." He went silent for a moment and Rose glanced up at his face, expecting to see that horribly sorrowful look in his eyes. That wasn't what she saw at all. When her gaze met his, all she could see and feel was peace. A smile crossed his face. "But now I have you!" he grinned. "As long as you're with me, I'll be ok."

She smiled back at him and laughed as he started babbling on. She relaxed her head onto his shoulders and closed her eyes, allowing him to lead her through the trees.

**A/N: So, what did you think of the first chapter? This will be my first real multi-chapter story, as I pretty much just post one-shots. I haven't had a plot bunny complicated enough for more than one chapter. Let me know what you think!**

**Much love,**

**doctorrosetyler **


	2. Stone Cold Disconnect

Return to Memory

Chapter 2: Stone Cold Disconnect

Disclaimer: I don't own it.

They continued walking for some time, the Doctor's voice murmuring gently in the air. She couldn't remember a time she had felt so relaxed, especially with all of the dreams she was having. Maybe, now that she knew he was happy with her, those awful dreams would fade. She knew the last thing he would want would be for her to be haunted by his pain. Especially a pain that he insisted was receding.

He was happy. She was happy. Though nothing had changed between them physically, she felt a connection to him that was stronger than she had imagined. The length of their hugs seemed to increase according to the amount of time they had spent apart, their conversations were filled with laughter and they often finished each other's sentences. She had learned so much while she was with him. She even knew the names of most of the planets he spoke about nowadays, though that could be the Doctor trying to speak mostly with words she knew. He never released her hand and she didn't want him to.

She breathed in the fragrant air and opened her eyes slowly. It was almost sunset and they were nearing the beautiful temple. It glistened a beautiful amber hue in the dying light. His monologue about the mistakes Stephen Hawking made in black hole physics slowed to silence as they approached the long set of steps to the temple. She turned to shoot a withering glare at him.

"What?" he asked, defensively.

"Why have there always got to be stairs?" she grumbled.

He sputtered. "They're a normal element of architecture!" he said.

She rolled her eyes and glanced up the steep slope. "But a thousand of them?"

He shrugged. "It's just what they do. You don't expect to see an elevator up to a holy place! Haven't you heard, stairway to heaven, elevator to hell!"

She sighed and started up the steep slope of stairs. They soon had a game going of singing and stepping and three misses- you're out! When they reached the top they were breathless and laughing, all Rose's annoyance at the stairs gone. She hadn't really been annoyed to begin with, though.

A tall, ethereal woman came to meet them. She wore flowing robes of green, the holy color of Caliliana. She had long black hair that fell in waves down to the small of her back, adorned with small flowers that looked a lot like cherry blossoms. She smiled and held out a pale hand to the Doctor, who bowed and kissed it gently. The woman glanced at Rose with a welcoming expression, taking her other hand and brushing it softly against Rose's cheek. Rose was a bit startled at how cool her touch was.

The Doctor released the woman's hand and returned his arm around Rose's shoulders.

"Welcome to the Sacred Stone Palace." The woman said, her voice lifting over the gentle twittering of the evening birdsong. "I am Marania, the head priestess. For what purpose have you come?"

The Doctor answered "We're the Doctor and Rose, and we came to see the palace."

The woman smiled. "I will show you around, then. Would you like to see the temple first?"

He shook his head, fingers tracing small patterns on Rose's shoulder and completely distracting her from what was going on in the real world. "If you don't mind, we'd like to just wander a bit."

Marania nodded and left, entering a wooden door in the middle of a bush, which disappeared the moment it was closed behind her. It was a bit disconcerting how little that surprised Rose. She had been traveling with the Doctor too long (but to her, too long could never be long enough).

He began to lead her through the gardens. In the still-dying sun, the flowers all glowed with a tinge of gold. The dirt path was well-worn and a thousand unknown scents wafted through the air. His large hand on the small of her back gave her a strong sense of belonging, even on this planet millions of miles and thousands of years from her home.

"It's beautiful" she said softly, afraid to break the silence but needing to break the tension.

He looked at the gardens for the first time. He hadn't noticed the landscape. Why would he look at flowers when he could see the light shine through her hair and fall gently over the curve of her cheek? Her lips shimmered in the remainder of the lip gloss she had put on that day; constant biting at her lip had worn it off. He found himself jealous of those soft rays of light, for they fell where he wished to trace his lips.

He snapped himself out of his reverie, and to avoid cliché, looked around the gardens before agreeing with her. "Yeah, It is."

They rounded a corner and came to the end of the path. She gasped at the sight before her. The sun was in its last few moments, the light now a dark amber and the sky unveiling a precious few stars. Before them was a small pond, the water still like a sheet of glass. The flowers crowded the shore, leaving Rose with a feeling of comfortable isolation. She looked down to the water at her feet, smiling at the picture they made. The Doctor was looking at her face, his eyes half-closed and a gentle smile on his lips. Was that how he looked at her? He looked like a man in love. Her heart leapt at the thought.

She didn't think before the words fell from her lips. She cursed her blabbering mouth.

"Doctor, do you love me?" she spoke so softly he wasn't sure if he had imagined the words.

His reflection's eyebrows shot up and his shoulders straightened. She wasn't sure whether she should regret the question- she genuinely wanted to know. She didn't care in what sense he loved her. Even if he denied any romantic feelings, she knew he loved her as his best friend, in the very least. His reflection's mouth opened and closed several times before he found his voice.

His mind was racing, his hearts thundering in his chest. He hadn't expected the question. She knew the answer, it didn't need saying. But he knew humans. For them, it did need saying. So he said it.

"Yes."

His voice was strong and solid. She didn't expect him to answer her clearly- she had expected a bunch of rambling and babbling; maybe an awkward pause and a quick subject change. Her breath stopped in her chest and she turned to him, abandoning their reflection in favor of his real face.

"What?" she breathed, afraid that she had imagined his answer.

He drew his hand up to her cheek, caressing the path the light had taken. The sun was gone now, the stars coming out to bathe them in a glowing twilight. He pulled her closer with his other arm. They were so close he could feel her breaths in his chest. Her eyes were twinkling with hope, and he felt a sort of freedom in letting go of his rules. "Never fall in love with a companion" was broken the instant Rose had come on board his ship.

"I love you." He said strongly, and there was no doubt between them at what he had said. She felt the happiness build up in her chest, bubbling out of her mouth as a laugh, her eyes misting over. Her reaction was infectious, and he found himself laughing with her, hugging her body to him and resting his cheek against her hair. She pulled back after a bit, looking him in the eyes.

"I love you too, you know." He laughed again, leaning down to press a soft kiss to her forehead. She frowned at him.

"What's that for?" he asked, still laughing.

"You just told me you love me, and you can't even kiss me properly?" She didn't wait for his answer before wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him down for a gentle kiss.

His lips caressed hers gently, his arms betraying the passion he felt while his kiss remained innocent and beautiful. She almost cried at the sensation- no man had ever kissed her so lovingly. His embrace made her feel wanted, but his kiss made her feel cherished. When they broke apart, a soft smile graced his lips.

"I think I'd like to see the temple now." She said, knowing that if they got too carried away, they might get arrested for indecency in a holy place.

He nodded and took her hand, a manic smile spread across his face. This certainly wasn't what he expected to happen today. He led her through the rest of the gardens, feeling content for the first time in a while. The gloom that had surrounded Rose was gone, and all he could see was her shining smile as they walked in the starlight. They came upon the temple, the stone sparkling silver in the night and a song drifted through the tall pillars. They climbed the stairs to the large wooden door, which opened as they approached it.

Rose tried to focus on her surroundings, though it was difficult with the new energy between herself and the Doctor. Her hand tingled in his, and she itched to return to the TARDIS to show him how much she really did love him, though she knew they should take it slow. He was too special to her to waste their first time together. She wanted it to be special to both of them. They had only kissed once, really (she didn't count the times with the vortex and Cassandra, since she wasn't exactly present for those events) and she was already addicted. He seemed just as eager to distract himself.

The lobby that they entered was grandiose, with vaulted ceilings that glowed with a liquid emerald color. The windows, though it was dark outside, were brightly lit with a mountain view on one side and a forest valley on the other. Rose imagined that would be the view in the daytime. The room was otherwise plain, with a set of emerald steps leading up to another wooden door. Marania stepped up behind them, though they had no idea from where she had come, and rested a hand gently on each of their shoulders.

"You cannot enter together." She said.

Startled and a bit nervous, the Doctor turned to her. "What do you mean?"

Marania gestured to the doors. "The stone room. Only one person can enter at a time."

He turned to Rose and nodded. She was reluctant to leave him, but her curiosity led her to release his hand and walk up the stairs to the doors. She turned to look at him, and with an energetic wave, entered the room.

She walked through the doors onto a terrace at sunset, with a warm breeze ruffling her hair. In the middle of the room was a large white stone. She noticed she was now barefoot, a lush carpet brushing through her toes like butter. She approached the stone.

When she reached it, it seemed to have changed color. It was now a sparkling gold and it was warm when she laid her hand upon it. She felt a presence in her mind. It wasn't intrusive, but it felt odd; she didn't much care for it and she wanted it to leave.

_What is your wish, young one?_

Her heartbeat quickened. Was this the goddess? She thought it was a myth.

_To most I am. To you, I do not have to be._

Rose knelt on the floor next to the stone, too shocked to do much else. She had never had another being in her mind before. She just hoped this goddess was friendly.

_What do you wish? _

She thought of what she wanted most. That was easy, to be with the Doctor. She already had that- had just recently gained what she had always wanted with him. But there would always be a bittersweet tang to their relationship. He said she changed him, made him less lonely and took away his pain.

But she would be gone someday. His face in the early afternoon lit in her memory and she remembered his words: "As long as you're with me, I'll be ok." But she wouldn't be with him forever.

A vision of him, with a burning planet and a dead love in his arms, burned in her mind. She would die. And he wouldn't be ok.

She wanted to remove his pain, so that when she was gone, he wouldn't need her.

_What would you give for this?_

Everything

_Would you give your mortality?_

Yes

_Would you give yourself?_

Yes

_Then the wolf shall give way to the storm._

And she knew then that she would die.

Standing outside the door, the Doctor heard a loud rumble from inside the room. The ground began to shake and the ceiling cracked above him. He ripped the door open and ran into the room. He found himself inside the TARDIS console room, with Rose on her hands and knees by the captain's chair. She looked pale and afraid, but when he looked in her eyes he saw peace.

He ran to her, confused as to why the room was now his ship and why she was flying through the vortex without a pilot. He tried to pull Rose into his arms, but his hands went directly through her. He looked into her eyes, and she smiled for him.

"I'm sorry."

He panicked.

"What did you wish for? What have you done?" he yelled, trying to find his screwdriver to scan her and find out what was wrong. He wasn't going to lose her when he had just found the freedom to love her.

"I love you." She said, still smiling. And she faded away.

He screamed her name and frantically ran about the console, trying to stop the ship's flight so that he could find out what had happened to Rose.

It was the longest flight of his lives. He couldn't get the TARDIS to stop, couldn't stop the tears from running down his face, and couldn't understand the song she was singing.

After what seemed like centuries, the ship thudded to the ground and the time rotor ground to a stop. His ship heaved a sigh around him and he glanced at the monitor.

And everything went black.

**A/N: Ok, before you kill me, note ALL of my other stories. Do Rose and the Doctor ever end up apart for long? Let me know what you think of it, and I'll try to update soon! I did have it all written and discovered that I didn't like some of it, so I'm doing a bit of a rewrite. **

**Reviews make me smile! **

**With love,**

**doctorrosetyler**


	3. Forest On Fire

Return to Memory

Chapter 3: Forest on Fire

Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who…but my birthday is in a couple months…

When the Doctor awoke ten minutes later, his face marked from the floor grating, he was a bit disoriented. Something bad had happened, but he didn't know what. The sight of Rose's jacket on the floor brought it all rushing back. He quickly picked himself up off the floor and ran through the halls, shouting her name.

"Rose!"

He rounded the corner and threw open her room door. Everything was as it should be. Her bed was unkempt, her shoes all over the floor and her closet door was open, all her clothes tumbling out. Her lamp was on and her favorite book was open and upside-down on the nightstand. Pictures of them together covered the wall and crowded any surfaces with frames purchased from alien markets. She wasn't here.

" Rose!"

He continued, going to the library. A fire crackled comfortingly in the fireplace next to the sofa. Books crowded the floor and her favorite blanket was draped over the back of the chair. She wasn't here either, and he felt the panic rising up in him again.

"ROSE!"

He checked his room next. It was empty. The kitchen, bathrooms, pool; all of the rooms she knew about were empty. Some rooms she had never seen, but he checked them anyway.

"You can't be gone! You just can't! Where are you?"

He shouted himself hoarse and ran himself ragged. It didn't help his search when the TARDIS continued to redirect him to the console room. He felt her prodding at his mind that he needed to go outside, but he didn't want to. All he wanted was to find her again; to hold her in his arms and breathe his love into her hair. They had only had one kiss, and he had only told her he loved her once. He had wasted so much time and he refused to believe that time had finally run out on him.

He started pushing buttons and flipping levers, which the TARDIS switched back the second he moved them. He was soon met with electric shocks when he continued to try to make her cooperate. He needed to take her back to the planet Rose had made the wish. He needed to find out what happened to her, so that maybe he could fix it. The TARDIS, however, was certainly making it clear that she was _staying here_.

"What's wrong with you?" he shouted at the console, pounding it with his fist. "Don't you want Rose back? Where could you have brought us that is so important we can't come back? With Rose?"

The TARDIS chimed sympathetically in his head and he got the feeling that she was trying to help. She wanted him to go outside. Maybe Rose was out there?

He had been an idiot! (the TARDIS agreed with a chime) He should go outside and search for her there. Rose had been the one to enter the coordinates anyway, in those strange few minutes. When he had entered his ship through the stone room (he still had no idea how that had happened), the TARDIS had already been flying to a destination that Rose herself had set. She shouldn't have known how to do that. It didn't matter now, as he finally obeyed his ship.

He stepped out onto the red grass and froze.

"It's not possible." He whispered as he stared at a sight he had known he would never see again. His mind was reeling, but what overwhelmed him was the feeling of being home. He hadn't felt that since he had burned this precious planet. His breath caught in his chest and stayed there, choking him with sorrow and love and happiness and everything in between. It welled up from his heart and blurred his vision.

He fell to his knees and wept.

His mind was flying with a sensation he hadn't felt in years- the telepathic tingling of his people. It was the feeling of family, of not being alone. He was no longer the last Time Lord. Everything smelled the same; the breeze carried the scent of golanka waffles, a celebratory dinner marking the beginning of a new season. The grass was the same red he had always known it to be, soft beneath his fingertips. He looked up through his tears and saw the silver trees swaying in the breeze, each reflecting the orange sunlight.

He remembered describing this sight to Rose. He had said it looked like a forest on fire. It still did, and it was burning him up inside because this was all he had wanted but she wasn't there to see it with him. He bent his head once more and continued to weep. He was overwhelmed by what this could mean.

Rose had given him back his _home._ And she had died for it. He felt sorrow for that- overwhelming, soul-crushing sorrow- because he loved her more than anything or anyone he had ever known. It felt like a betrayal to be happy about the gift she had given him, when it had meant her death in the end. Now he knew what the TARDIS had wanted him to see. It wasn't Rose. It was Gallifrey.

He stayed there for what seemed like hours, overwhelmed by the happiness of coming home and the horrible sadness from losing Rose. He loved this planet. He loved Rose. He marveled at the gift she had given him and mourned at the cost.

Was it bad that, in this moment, he would destroy his planet again to get her back?

He looked up from his place on the ground and saw the gleaming citadel in the distance. The sprawling city and lower class village called to his heart. His home was waiting before him, though he had left it behind long ago.

He stood from his place on the ground, locked the TARDIS door, and began to walk towards the city. Along the way he passed creatures long extinct and plants he had forgotten to miss. He saw the tree he and his friends had marked when they were young. It had been a sapling then, too. Now it was an old and withered tree and he felt his spirit must look the same.

The glow that lit everything under Gallifrey's golden sun felt more right than any alien sun he had ever felt. He heard the music now, drifting through the trees from what seemed to be the new-summer's festival. How fitting that she would land him in a place of beginning, when it seemed to him that everything had ended.

He began to notice something strange as he walked through the familiar forest. He had memories of this forest that he was sure he had never experienced. According to the story coming through his head, the planet had never been destroyed. He focused on this alternate memory, trying to pinpoint what had changed. This was certainly Rose's doing. Only she could change history without changing all of reality.

He remembered that crucial moment, where he had chosen to end the war. And it was different.

A golden cloaked woman, seemingly a ghost, had appeared before him. She looked like a being born of the vortex, just wisps of light and a voice that burned his hearts. She lifted her hands and turned the Daleks to dust.

His throat tightened as he saw her face. Bad Wolf had not died with his ninth form. It had lived and ended the Time War- in the beginning and the end. The ghost had kissed his cheek, a light tingle that he swore he could still feel, and disappeared. He had returned to his planet and was hailed a hero.

The irony twisted his gut. He was a hero, possibly the most famous man on Gallifrey, when he had been the one to destroy them all.

His memories were the same and different. He knew what they were like before, remembered the pain of losing his people to his own hand, but he also remembered saving them. Rose had not just created an alternate reality; she had changed the past and removed his greatest regret and burden without changing the rest of the universe. The planets they had saved still remained, and some of the scars of the Time War marred the vortex, but the entire civilization of Gallifrey was restored. He couldn't thank her enough.

He was entering the city now, passing the stalls selling food and the people milling about in the shops. The new memories were pouring in faster now. Last week he had been with Rose, eating chips at a shop down the street from her mum's. Last week he had also been helping prepare this festival. The people around him recognized him as he walked, waving to him and smiling. Some of them greeted him "Hello, Doctor! Would you like some galakar?" He shook his head to refuse the sweet drink, and continued down the road to where his house was. He lived alone at the top of a hill, at the end of a winding path through silver trees.

It seemed like the sort of place he would live, if Gallifrey had survived. It seemed that after the war, he had stayed here most of the time. He was a highly important member of the council, though they only met once a month. He worked at the university as a professor of transdimensional physics. He had a life that he had not built here, but it suited him. This life that Rose had built for him wasn't exactly what he would have chosen for himself, had Gallifrey survived. He wouldn't be so grateful for the place to call home. He wouldn't have craved domestic like he did now. He would have been a traveler forever, taking his home for granted. She had fashioned this life for him _now_, after going through all he had suffered in the years since the war, and she included all the things she knew he missed or wanted.

She just forgot to include herself.

The Doctor sighed, stopping at the fountain in the middle of the square. The citadel loomed above him, something he once abhorred because it was a testament to the pompous tyranny of the Time Lords. Now, he had to fight back the tears once again because it was something he believed he would never see.

He had imagined for years what it would be like to go back once again and see his planet. He had imagined happiness and laughter and joy. He did feel all of those things, but it was bittersweet. He hadn't asked for this to happen, though he was more than grateful for it. But everything he saw left his hearts feeling just a little bit empty, and his hand very cold. As he walked, he would turn to tell her a story or make a joke, but she wasn't there. He longed to hear her laughter again. All his thoughts from the fountain to his house were flying with ideas on finding Rose. He wouldn't give her up so easily. He held on to one last hope that he would find her at his house; that she had created his life with her in it and he just didn't know it yet.

He rounded the final corner and stood in awe of his home. He knew what it looked like from his created memories, but he couldn't have estimated the beauty of it without seeing it with his own eyes. It was three stories tall, with a sloping roof covered with black tile. The house itself was made of the amber brick that all Gallifreyan buildings were made of. It was covered with silver ivy that shimmered in the dying sunlight. There were large windows on the outside, and he knew from memory that they were in every room of the house. He pulled his key out of his pocket- a key that shouldn't have been there- and opened the dark wooden door.

The inside was decorated like any earth home would have been. He suspected that was because he loved earth so much. He walked through the entryway into the living room. The walls were a deep orange and the room was furnished with a large plush sofa and a brick fireplace.

After a moment of standing in the unfamiliar room that was far too comfortable, the Doctor went up the stairs, bypassing the second floor in favor of the top floor, which was his room. He climbed the last few steps into the brightly lit room. Two sides of the room were glass, with beautiful curtains to cover them at night. He walked to the window on his right, where he could see the sun setting over the silver forest.

It was at that moment, looking out from his window in the direction he had walked, that he noticed where Rose had sent him in her final moments. He had been directly north of the citadel, between civilization and the Mountains of Contentment.

She had landed him in the Valley of Redemption. She forgave him for the universe and saved him along with them. He grabbed his coat off the chair and sped out the door, running for the TARDIS. He would return to that planet, whether the TARDIS wanted to or not, and he would find a way to bring Rose back. He didn't deserve to be exalted a hero, when the one that had saved them all from eternal death at his own hands had disappeared into the air.

The Bad Wolf waved her hand one more time, unseen and unknown to the universe.

**A/N: So, how was it? I changed it around a bit. I'm not used to writing angst, I prefer Rose/Doctor fluff. **

**Reviews make me happy : ) **

**With Love,**

**doctorrosetyler **


	4. Back to the Beginning Again

Return to Memory

Chapter 4: Back to the Beginning…Again

He ran.

The Doctor ran faster and harder than he had ever remembered running before. Instead of wandering through the market as he had on his way there, he went straight into the forest behind his house. Trees passed by in silver blurs. He almost tripped several times on tree roots or unsuspecting wildlife. All he could think of was getting to that planet to get her back. It took him only a few minutes to complete the journey and burst through the doors of his TARDIS.

She greeted him with a melancholy chime, understanding his pain at the loss of Rose. She loved her, too. Rose had been the TARDIS's favorite companion- that was why she had allowed Rose to look into her heart to begin with. He began to pull levers and push buttons, and this time the TARDIS cooperated. The rotor began grinding up and down and the ship dematerialized into the vortex.

The vortex was much more difficult to navigate than it had been previously. There were many twists and turns and tight spaces to get to the place that Gallifrey had been recreated. As he did the math he realized that this was the only place in the universe that a new planet could be created and not alter the gravitational path of another. She had created his planet outside of time and space.

He entered the coordinates for Korlok IV, the stone palace in which she had made the wish. The TARDIS made it clear through various electric shocks that she did not care to return there. He didn't either, but he didn't know where else to start. When the ship landed, he stood there for a moment; afraid of what he would find when he stepped out of the doors. If his aim was correct, and in situations like this it always was (no matter how much Rose teased him about his driving), he would be in the stone room. He stepped out of the doors and into the room.

The stone was there, in the center of the room. The breeze ruffled his hair and the carpet was warm under his suddenly bare feet. The sunlight filtered into the room through the open sides of the temple and he approached the stone. He knew the moment he touched it that this wasn't going to work.

The stone was cold, all the magic gone.

He collapsed to the floor of the room, for the first time in his life completely out of ideas. His mind was one great big blank, his hearts in several pieces and beating painfully in his chest. She had used up the magic in the stone with her wish, and now there was none left to reverse it. He had no way to bring her back, not when he was messing with something completely out of the realms of science. Tears once again fell from his eyes and he didn't bother wiping them away. He understood why she had done this, but he wished with all his hearts that she hadn't. He could have been holding her now, safe in the TARDIS; still homeless, but not without her. His mind would never be lonely again, but his hearts would always long for her. How could he go live the life she had built for him if he wasn't with her?

A sound in the room made him turn his head quickly. Marania stood there, a sad smile on her face and a rose in her hand. He remained silent and waited for her to speak. She approached him and extended the flower to him.

"The Goddess gives you this. To bring you hope." She said, a knowing look in her eyes.

He took it from her, frowning slightly. Without Rose, was there any point in trying not to be rude? The Goddess had gotten her wish wrong and messed everything up. He was supposed to have Rose his love, not rose the flower. He seethed in quiet rage for a moment before calming himself. Rose would be sad if he returned to the somber man he was before she was with him.

The scent of the flower drifted into his nose and it smelled like _her_- strawberries and denim and the vortex. He buried his nose in the petals, inhaling it and imagining it was her hair. How could this give him hope? All it did was remind him that she wasn't there.

He looked up at her, ignoring the tears that were still trailing down his face. "What do you mean? Where is she?"

She shook her head. " I don't know."

He stood, angry at the universe for playing such games with him. "You have to know!"

She smiled softly at him. "It is not my business to know what she plans."

"Then how am I supposed to find her?" he felt the Oncoming Storm brewing inside of him, and this time he knew he didn't have the strength to fight it.

"Go home." She said.

"What?" he asked, confused and rather angry at her order.

"Go home."

He stood firmly now, like a stubborn child that refused to eat their vegetables. "I'm not leaving until I find her, or at least a clue as to what happened to her."

He was surprised at the genuine sadness in the woman's eyes. "Then you will never find her."

She looked down to the ground between them and he stepped closer to her, determined to get her attention and find out where Rose was. "I didn't want this. I'm pretty sure she didn't want this either."

Marania shook her head. "The Goddess molds everything to the best."

His fingers tightened on the stem of the rose, the thorns biting into his palm. "This isn't the best! I don't have Rose!"

Her eyes shot to his face and he saw anger there. "The Goddess never makes a mistake! She would not leave one lonely heart in pieces. Imagine what care she would take with many?"

He was silent at this, anger seething under his skin.

She relaxed into her gentle demeanor once more. "Go home."

There were no more clues here, no magic, and no trace of Rose. He turned back to the TARDIS and went inside. The TARDIS moaned gently, the walls throughout the ship creaking under the weight of her grief. She prodded the Doctor's mind, asking what they were going to do next.

"We're going home." He said gently, sitting on the captain's chair and lifting the flower to his nose once more. He prayed that it never died, so he could remember her this way at least. His head was suddenly throbbing, and looking down he saw that the TARDIS had thrown a wrench at his head, obviously angry at the idea of giving up.

"I'm not giving up!" he shouted to the ship. "I just don't know where to start!"

The ship poked his mind again, obviously meaning that that wasn't good enough.

"What do you want me to do, go wandering about for nothing? I'll never find her if I do that! There are too many places, too many variables!" he yelled, exasperated and frustrated and so, so very sad.

The TARDIS prodded him again, obviously meaning that was exactly what she wanted him to do.

He sighed and laid his head in his hands. "What if she really is dead?" he said softly, afraid to voice his greatest fear but needing to be reassured.

A pain shot through his right shoulder and he knew the TARDIS had now thrown the sonic hammer at him. Obviously she either thought the idea was ridiculous or was afraid of that as well and was angry at him for voicing it. He sighed and stood up, determined to return to Gallifrey for some food. He didn't have anything in the TARDIS at the moment, and he needed to eat if he was going to try and find Rose the way his ship wanted to go about it. He would do it, though.

He worked the console as they slipped into the vortex, the TARDIS almost driving herself there. The path through the vortex was tricky, but she found her way fine. He was checking the monitor once again to make sure they were on track as they landed, and he saw four words that made his heart twist and leap at the same time.

_Bad Wolf still burns._

He almost smacked himself for being such an idiot. The TARDIS was connected with her! The TARDIS had known she was alive- no wonder she had thrown things at him when she thought he had given up! That meant that now he knew for sure that she was still alive, or at least a part of her was. All he had to do was find her and figure out how to make it right! For the first time since he had last touched her hand, the Doctor felt hope that he could be with her again. He ran to his room and gingerly placed the rose from the temple on his bed before running back to the console room.

"Don't worry old girl. She's out there somewhere and I'll find her! I have to!"

He threw himself out the doors, hoping to make a quick stop for food before jumping back in the vortex to search for any sign of her. The TARDIS had landed him in the middle of the lower-class village. His house was on the edge of the village, right next to the forest. He liked to be as far from the citadel as possible and he found he loved the people of the lower class. Rose had definitely built his memories accurately. He was building a device to track the heart of the TARDIS and find Bad Wolf in his mind as he walked down the street, through the same marketplace he had been through just a few hours ago. He still couldn't get it into his head that his planet had returned. He stopped at a vendor to buy a golanka waffle. He hadn't had one in centuries.

He almost choked on his waffle when he heard a voice that terrified him.

"What the hell are you going on about now? It's your turn to run the shop. All right, fine. But be back here in five minutes!"

He turned around. He knew it couldn't be the person he thought it was.

In the little shop next to him was an older blonde woman, dressed in the white robes of the lower class. Her voice pierced his ears again as she accepted money from a customer and sent him off.

Before him stood Jackie Tyler.

His waffle seemed to double in size in his mouth as it went dry. He worked to swallow it before stepping closer, pretending to browse the merchandise. Would she remember him? Did she know who he was? Well, of course she knew who he was on Gallifrey- Rose had made him a household name, but what about her daughter? Where was she?

He continued to eavesdrop, knowing he had caught her attention by picking up a magazine. Gossip mag. Right. It was Jackie, after all. He found it a bit odd that she completely ignored him in favor of the other customers. Did she know who he was and didn't want to say anything? That wasn't like her at all. He had expected at least a slap by now.

He extended his telepathy subtly; not enough that others would notice, but enough that he could gain a little information from a human.

He was blocked. Jackie had defenses. Time Lord defenses.

Jackie was a Time Lady?

That was beyond weird. He drew back immediately, before she realized he had been trying to hack his way into her mind. He was so busy pretending to be absorbed in the magazine that he didn't notice when Jackie left and was replaced by another person.

"Can I help you with something?" he heard from a familiar voice. A very familiar voice. He dropped the magazine.

Rose Tyler stood before him, dressed like her mother. His hearts absolutely soared at the sight of her, and he was glad he noticed the tightness of her smile before he had acted.

She was giving him that "Buy something or leave" smile that salespeople give to people. This wasn't her Rose-loves-the-Doctor smile. She had no idea who he was. But this _was_ Rose. His Rose. He could see Bad Wolf in her timelines, though they seemed to be shrouded by her alternate timelines. She didn't remember him? He pushed his hurt to the side to be dealt with later. He knew it was very important at this moment that he not make himself look like a complete creeper to Rose.

"Um…yes, I was wondering if you had any…uh…chocolate?"

Her eyebrow raised and she pointedly glanced at the large display of chocolate that he currently had his elbow resting on. Ah. So much for not looking like an idiot.

He laughed nervously and scratched the back of his neck, a gesture Rose had teased him mercilessly about in this regeneration. "Ah. I see. Need new glasses, me."

She gave a little laugh, which encouraged him to continue speaking to her. It was almost closing time for the market and people were thinning out. It was only the two of them at the shop now. He had run into her by chance, and now he needed a guarantee that he would be able to find her again. He resorted to the only line he could come up with in his mind. "So, you come here often?"

Apparently, his mind was an idiot too. It was a very good thing that she thought that was funny.

"I work here with my mum." She said, laughing. Her salesgirl smile was gone, and now it was just a Rose smile. It warmed his hearts. He had though he would never see that smile again. Her eyebrows furrowed a bit, and he knew that was the expression that meant she was about to ask a question she already knew the answer to.

"You're the Doctor, aren't you?" Hearing her say his name, even in this context, made him smile widely. Which seemed to confuse her a bit. Right. Better tone the manic down until she remembers.

"Yeah. What's your name?" he already knew, but he should have her say it before he did and she thought he was a creep.

She blushed and looked down. "Rose. Rose Tyler."

He had to resist grabbing her hand and telling her to run, like he had when he first met her. He didn't notice when Jackie came in and took the register away, he was so focused on her. A grin spread across his face, her name filling him with warmth.

"Nice to meet you, Rose Tyler." He held out his hand to shake hers, and she took it. Her temperature matched his and a spark rushed between them. Good to know that was still there, though she looked surprised. Her grin returned full-force, and she met his eyes. There was no recognition, but there was excitement.

"Nice to meet you too, Doctor." She said.

He picked up a chocolate bar and reached his hand into his pocket to pay for it. Rose glanced over to where she left the register, surprised at its absence.

"Actually, I think we're closed for the night." She said, apologetically.

He put the chocolate back before offering her a smile. "I suppose I'll just have to come back tomorrow?" he said.

She smiled and nodded. "Yeah, tomorrow."

He leaned over the counter a bit, loving this flirting game but still wishing he could kiss her and hold her. "Will you be here tomorrow?"

She nodded again, her cheeks turning a cute pink. "Yeah. All day." Still pink and yellow then. That's good. Though he was pretty sure she wasn't human anymore.

He nodded. "Good."

She agreed. "Good."

He didn't want to leave her, even when she didn't know him. But he knew he couldn't stay with her now, when she didn't remember how important she was to him. She didn't remember how she had saved the universe, his people, and him. He held onto the hope that, somewhere inside, she knew she loved him. And he loved her.

"I'll see you tomorrow, then." He grinned, turning to leave.

She gave him a small wave. "Yeah."

He returned to the TARDIS, heading straight to the kitchen. He was still hungry, and had absolutely no idea where his waffle went.

As he made beans on toast, because it reminded him of Rose, he relayed his story to the TARDIS. When he finished eating he transported his ship to his home, parking her right in his bedroom. He wasn't sure if he could sleep outside his TARDIS, but he was willing to give it a try.

As he was walking out the doors he finished his story, telling the TARDIS how Rose seemed at least charmed already.

"I told you I've got the moves!" he said as he closed the blue doors.

He was met with a pillow to the head. Ah. So the TARDIS had made friends with his house.

He was exhausted, as he hadn't slept for weeks and hadn't eaten since breakfast with Rose on the TARDIS. How many days ago was that? It felt like months, but he was pretty sure it had only been one day. With a full stomach and heavy eyes, he laid down on his bed and fell asleep almost instantly.

He dreamed of golden hair, pink cheeks, and forever.

**A/N: So, what did you think? Bet you didn't see **_**that **_**one coming, did you? There will be more chapters, all of which I am still working on. Let me know what you thought about it! Reviews always make me write faster! **

**With Love, **

**doctorrosetyler **


	5. A Bit of Travelling

Return to Memory

Chapter 5: A Bit of Travelling

Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who. Or David Tennant. But they are definitely on my birthday list!

Rose lay awake in her bed that night, trying with all her might to fall asleep. Her hearts were still pounding from her conversation in the marketplace hours before.

The Doctor.

Why did that name feel right? Why did that smile he had given her look so familiar? It was manic- she could tell the man must be slightly insane, but everything about him was right. Her fingers had itched to ruffle his hair. When he shook her hand, she had felt electricity between them. She was incredibly attracted to him, and she had only just met him.

She sighed and threw the covers off, walking across her room to her small window. The stars shone down on her in constellations she had long ago memorized. She had always been fascinated with space. Only the lucky few got to travel there. She had longed to attend the Academy when she was a child. She dreamed of having a TARDIS of her own, to travel through time and space. Only graduates got a title to substitute their names- the status that held them above the rest. But she was too ruled by her emotions, and her family was too poor. When her dad had perished in the Time War, her mum had opened the shop to support them. She had been rejected by the Academy, so she ran the shop with her mother.

She fumbled with her necklace as she thought. She ran her finger over the teeth on the key, feeling its comforting weight in her hand. She had had it as long as she could remember and it helped her concentrate when she kept getting distracted. Unfortunately, it seemed to be helping her concentrate on her distraction.

The Doctor was way out of her league. He couldn't have been flirting with her, she must have imagined it. He had a title, maybe even a TARDIS. He had all of time and space at his fingertips. Why would he want her?

She knew all these things, but she still thought of his smile as she stared up into the stars. His laugh echoed through her mind, as if she had been hearing it for years.

She scoffed at herself. What was she doing? She was up late from her weekly sleep, and she was daydreaming about a man that she had just met. She turned from the window and flopped herself back in her bed, determined not to think of him again.

Still, she smiled into her pillow and she couldn't wait until tomorrow.

The Doctor woke in his bed, the morning sun shining brightly into the room. He sighed and turned over, remembering the events of the previous day.

He had lost Rose. He had found Rose. And now he had to make her remember.

The weight of his loss pushed him into the mattress for a moment. Rose was alive, but she didn't know him. Would she ever get her memories back? Even if she fell in love with him again, she wouldn't know of all the time they had spent together. She wouldn't remember how she loved chips, and how the ash had fallen like snow around them that Christmas when he regenerated. She had forgotten the Dalek in the museum, wouldn't understand the meaning of Rexacoricofallapatorius, and would have no idea what he meant if he asked her "Are you my mummy?".

What had stolen her memories? If this Goddess had done this properly, he wouldn't be stuck feeling homeless on Gallifrey, trying to win the heart of a woman who held both of his hearts in her hand. Sure, they hadn't had the ideal relationship. They spent far too much time as 'just friends' and the experiences they shared had brought them together. Their relationship had been fraught with peril and their first real kiss was actually their third.

He remembered how he had longed to court her properly.

He sat straight up in bed. That was it. His desires had done this to her. He had a second chance to court her and get to know her properly and respectfully. He could take her on dates and tell her he loved her _before_ she actually knew. He could say it, not because it needed saying, but because he had the freedom to love her.

He could have smacked himself, had the house not decided to do it first. At least the house threw pillows instead of heavy metal tools.

He would just have to make her fall in love with him again.

He hopped out of bed and ran into the TARDIS, determined to look extremely foxy today. He had a Time Lady to woo, after all.

Rose walked to the shop, lugging the heavy register with her. Why did her mum have to bring this thing home with them every night? Was it that hard to just take the money out?

The morning was cool, dew settling on the red grass and making the trees shimmer in the early sun. She enjoyed her walk to the shop and tried her best not to think of the Doctor. He had said he was coming around today. How long would she have to wait to see him again?

Not long, she realized as she rounded the corner. There he was, sitting by the fountain eating a golanka waffle…with bananas?

She opened the shop, trying to reason out why it didn't seem strange at all for him to be eating banana on his waffle, even though she would have thought anyone else a complete nutter for doing it. She glanced at him every once in a while, and could tell he was trying his best to be inconspicuous. She laughed at his antics.

Why did she feel that she _knew_ this man?

There were a few people milling about in the streets; mostly early morning shoppers and people who had spent the night out partying and hadn't yet gone to bed. She had a few customers and she served them, though she had an eye on the Doctor almost constantly. She met his gaze a few times and they both glanced away quickly. After a few minutes, he finally came over to the shop. There were no other customers around, and she was glad to have a moment of semi-aloneness with him, regardless of her worries last night. If he wanted to talk to her, she certainly wasn't going to stop him. Not when he grinned like that.

"Good morning, Rose Tyler!" he said, striding over to her. His hair was slightly mussed from his nervous habit of running his fingers through it, which really made it more attractive to her. His glasses were perched on his nose, though she was rather sure he didn't need them. He was wearing the same suit he had been yesterday, though for some reason she hadn't expected him to be wearing anything else.

"Morning, Doctor" she said shyly, smiling as he passed the chocolate completely. She doubted at this point that he had wanted chocolate in the first place.

"Splendid day, isn't it?" he said, hoping to start the conversation without making himself look like an idiot.

"A bit, yeah." She said. It was splendid because he was here. She was certain that she had never looked forward to coming to work like she did today.

There was a bit of an awkward silence. He clearly wanted to talk to her, but couldn't think of what to say. He fiddled with his tie, adjusted his glasses, and played with the broken corner of the case he was leaning on. Normally she would have thought him weird. Right now she just found him adorable.

"Did you want that chocolate you came for yesterday?" she asked, trying to prod him into conversation so he would look up at her. She wanted desperately to figure out why his old eyes (far older than he looked) were so familiar. He grinned at her.

"Right, yes. Chocolate. See, Rose Tyler, that is what I like about you! Always remembering the details." He cursed his mouth for running away without him. He wasn't supposed to know her and now she would think he was a stalker or something.

Instead, she laughed. He sighed with relief (in his mind, of course) and reached over for a chocolate bar. She entered the price in the register and he paid for the bar.

When all business was taken care of, though, he couldn't bear to leave her. He tried to tell himself that he needed to leave because she didn't know who he really was, but that excuse fell flat because she was looking at him the way she used to- all anticipation and waiting for what he would do next. Now, with his purchase in his hand, he scrambled to find a way to connect with her again- some guarantee that he would be allowed to see her on a regular basis.

Well, if he was courting her that would work. But somehow it still wasn't in him to follow the rules of his home. Besides, he was rather sure Jackie would see the age difference in his timelines and immediately refuse to let him be with Rose. Though there had been something a bit off with his body lately. Surely he was imagining that young feeling he had. It was almost like he had only regenerated once instead of nine times. Tomorrow he was sure he would wake with all the same aches and pains he used to have.

"So, what are you doing for lunch?"

He glanced up and grinned. It seems she had just taken care of the problem for him. Jackie couldn't get angry at him if it was Rose that asked him to take her out. (Why he was assuming Jackie knew who he was and disliked him was a mystery in itself- she didn't remember him either.)

"Oh, thought I'd go get chips." He said, hoping mention of her old favorite food would spark her memory, and they could get this whole forgetfulness thing over with. It was getting exhausting to have to hold back his babbling mouth. He just wanted to grab her and snog her, truthfully.

She scrunched her nose up in that adorable confused look of hers. "What are chips?"

Well, so much for that plan…maybe tasting them would help? "They're really delicious, Rose! You have to try them!" He tried to hide his disappointment with all his manic mannerisms. With this Rose that didn't know him, it worked horribly well.

"Where do I get them?" she said, her interest piqued. He could see an adventure in her eyes and felt his hearts stutter with excitement. Would she let him take her away?

"Would you like me to take you?" he asked, hoping she would say yes and he could scan her discreetly with the TARDIS to see if he could make her memories come back.

She grinned at him, his favorite smile with the tip of her tongue poking out from her teeth. Oh yes, she would let him take her away. "Yeah. I get lunch in four hours. Meet me back here?"

He could have jumped with excitement. She didn't know him, but she still trusted him enough to take her somewhere. "Absolutely! See you in exactly four hours!" he smiled and walked away, determined to straighten up the TARDIS and hide all traces of her previous presence. He didn't want her seeing her own belongings and thinking he traveled with any women that weren't her.

"Don't be late!" she called. He may be a Time Lord, but something told her he had a knack for being a bit…off with his arrival. Puzzled at this mysterious familiarity, she went about her morning a bit distractedly. Her mum gave her a puzzled look when she said she was going out for lunch. She gave her permission, grumbling that it was "about time she found a man". She certainly wasn't going to tell her mum that she was going out with a man with a title and far more age in his eyes than she could possibly catch up with, even if she used all twelve of her future regenerations.

How could someone only in their second regeneration be so old? She puzzled at this until lunchtime, when she saw him across the fountain. She hurriedly said goodbye to her mother, and before she had time to be asked any questions, was gone and long out of range of Jackie's concerned and irritated gaze.

He saw her running towards him and couldn't help but grin. He had to remind himself that holding hands was considered _extremely_ intimate on Gallifrey, lest he hold his out to her like he used to. He shoved his lonely fingers back in his pockets, cursing the prudishness of his telepathic race. She reached him, grinning and slightly flushed from her run. That was a face he was very familiar with. He laughed.

"What has you running for your life?" he asked her.

She blushed lightly. "I didn't want my mum to ask questions. She's a bit…overbearing at times."

He snorted internally. Overbearing? Jackie? Noooooo. "Ah. I see."

He began walking and she walked alongside him. Their elbows would brush occasionally and he felt a tingle of electricity. He'd always felt that with Rose, but now she could feel it too and he remembered why his race was so against touch. It was _very_ personal. Through the sleeve of his jacket, it wasn't very strong and it didn't seem to bother her at all. But skin to skin contact was practically like having sex in the middle of a crowded street. That didn't stop him from wanting to reach out and grab her hand so he could feel that comforting tingle on his palm once again. He wanted to know what it would feel like now that she was telepathic, too. Would the electricity be stronger?

He shook himself out of these thoughts when she spoke.

"So, where do we get these chips?" she asked, trying to make conversation with a suddenly quiet Time Lord.

He smiled at her as they rounded the corner and went down a somewhat empty street. "Well, we're going to have to do a bit of traveling."

She frowned at his answer, looking around for a transport disk or something. How were they going to travel without a vehicle? There was nothing on this street. He walked up to a large blue box and took a key out of his pocket. The key on her neck grew a bit warm and she played with it between her fingers as he opened the doors.

"We're going to have dinner in a big blue box?" she frowned at him. "Is this a joke?"

He was still grinning when he gestured she go inside. "Not at all."

Against her better judgment, she walked through the door. She knew immediately what this was. She had dreamed of having one of her own. The ship made a happy chime inside her head, welcoming her and clearly glad to see her. This place was so familiar and so alien that she felt a bit overwhelmed.

"It's a TARDIS." She said dumbly, looking to him in shock. Time Lords weren't supposed to let other Gallifreyans on their TARDIS, nor were they supposed to let people who hadn't graduated from the Academy off the planet. By the way he was adjusting settings and pushing buttons, it appeared that was exactly what he was doing.

He looked up from his settings and smiled at her. "Yup. This is my TARDIS. Wonderful old ship, she is. Saved my life lots of times…weeeelll, exactly 3,749 times…and a half, but let's not go into that. It's a long story."

She waited patiently for his babbling to stop. Something told her interrupting him would only make it worse. "You're going to go against all the rules of this world…for _lunch_?" she asked, incredulously.

He looked at her, confused. "What do you mean?"

"This!" she said, a bit exasperated. "I'm not supposed to be in here! I haven't graduated from the Academy, I'm not supposed to go off the planet! I shouldn't even be allowed inside your TARDIS!"

The TARDIS made an angry noise inside her head, but she didn't understand it. The Doctor admonished the ship and it backed out of her mind. He turned to her, his face set and determined. "Who made those rules?" he asked.

Rose sighed and tried to remember. "The Council."

"And when did they make them?"

She saw where he was going with this. "During the Time War."

He stood from the console and came over to where she was still standing, near the door. "They made those rules to keep people who weren't soldiers safe. To keep innocent people from getting killed for a little travel. They just haven't changed the rules because they've gotten so used to them. Nobody enforces them anymore."

She finally relaxed a bit and stepped further into the ship. The TARDIS brushed her mind again, but did not make a sound. It seems it had been told not to. Her stomach rumbled and she blushed.

"Ready to go eat?" he asked, with a knowing smirk on his face.

She had a strange urge to smack him and she tamped it down immediately, nodding instead. She shouldn't touch him, let alone hit him. Their handshake yesterday had been proof enough. She was lucky nobody had seen that. It really was highly inappropriate. It was strange that she hadn't felt it was wrong- she still didn't. In fact, she wanted to do it again.

The column began to make a grating sound, and she could barely contain her excitement at finally doing what she had always dreamed of doing. She was travelling in time and space, just as she had dreamed. The TARDIS lurched back and forth in the vortex, and she had to grip the railing to keep from being tossed about the room. She had a slight hunch that he had failed his driving test for this thing. The ship landed and she rushed to the door, waiting impatiently for him to set the parking brake (how did she know what that was?). He ran up next to her, grinning.

"Ready to see experience something new, Rose Tyler?" he asked.

She laughed and pushed the doors open with him. "Definitely!" she said.

And they were met with guns to their face.

So, she had been spot on with that hunch about his driving.

**A/N: So, what did you think about this chapter? As you can probably tell, I know very little about the actual Gallifrey from the show. I'm sort of making it up as I go along, so if it helps just think of it as an alternate Gallifrey. Thanks for reading and I'll try and update soon! (Insert shameless begging for reviews here)**

**With Love,**

**doctorrosetyler**


	6. Danger and Chips

Return to Memory

Chapter 6: Danger and Chips

The Doctor sat in the jail cell, trying his best to seem like this wasn't a completely normal occurrence for him. Rose, to her credit, didn't seem all that worried by it. Just once, he would like the TARDIS to take him to the right destination. Because of her rather frustrating habit of landing on the _almost_ right planet (almost right, but always just off enough to be dangerous) he now had to try and woo a Rose that didn't remember him _while_ being arrested and altogether stressed. She put up with the danger and all of that because that was what they did: traveled together and saved worlds and helped people. This Rose didn't do that.

He was trying his best not to mope, but all he could do was sit there, rather frustrated by the recent turn of events, and try to figure out a way to escape the prison they were currently stuck in. Rose was sitting calmly by the small window they had, looking out at the purple sunset and smiling.

Wait…what?

He looked again, to be sure that it wasn't his imagination. His second glance confirmed the impossible (or what he thought to be impossible). This Rose, who had never before (to her knowledge) been on a dangerous adventure with him, who was currently in a jail cell for invading private property, was smiling. He needed to say something. He needed to bridge this gap that had been forced between him and the woman he loved but who did not remember him.

"I'm sorry that I got us into this mess." He said, for lack of anything better in his slightly muddled and completely overwhelmed brain. She just turned her gentle smile to him, waiting for him to continue.

He fiddled with his sonic screwdriver. "It's just…weeeelll…the TARDIS doesn't always take me where I want to go. She has a mind of her own, my ship."

Rose laughed. "I had a feeling about that, really." He frowned and waited for her to continue.

A sort of comfortable silence fell over them then, and Rose turned to look at the sunset once again, confused over her own lack of panic. She really should be freaking out right now. For some reason, she just knew that he would get them out of this. Though her unwavering and somewhat random faith in him unnerved her, she couldn't help feeling it. She would just have to ride this out and see where it led. She didn't really have much of a choice, anyway. She found his crinkled frown and pouting lip adorable, and despite the situation, she knew his upset face wasn't really about their incarceration.

"Just one planet over." The Doctor mumbled.

"Excuse me?" she said, turning from the window.

"Chips. Lunch. The TARDIS landed us one planet over from the one I was aiming for. I'm so sorry I didn't realize it until after we were arrested." He said, remorse clear on his face.

She got down from her perch to sit beside him, resting her hand gently on his sleeve. The electricity hummed through the clothing, but she ignored the fact that she shouldn't be touching him. "S'okay." She said, frowning at the strange accent that had just popped out of her mouth. She ignored it in favor of the morose Doctor. When she looked up, she was a bit confused.

He was staring at her again, with that strange expression on his face. It was as if he was looking for something, but couldn't find it. She longed to reach up and smooth the wrinkle from his brow with her fingers but knew that she should not. She clenched her left hand tightly, allowing the one on the Doctor's arm to stay, for the moment.

"I'm going to get us out of here." He promised, and he was surprised by her immediate answer.

"I know" she replied. Her smile encouraged him and he whipped out the sonic from his pocket.

"Ready for a break out, Rose Tyler?" he grinned.

She stood behind him as he began to work on the lock. There was a familiar buzz and a soft snick as the door swung open. "That was easy." She said.

He grinned back at her. "Here comes my favorite part!" he said, gesturing at the approaching and rather alarmed guards. "Rose Tyler, run for your life!"

She shouted with laughter as they dashed out of the prison and away from the howls of the guards. It was all so very perfect, she thought, except that she had a strong feeling she should be holding his hand. She clenched her hands to her sides and continued to run behind the Doctor as they approached the relative safety of the trees.

Adrenaline still pumping through their systems, the Doctor and Rose collapsed against a large tree to catch their breath. She was still trying to hold back her laughter, and he was high on the familiarity of running from danger with his precious Rose.

Oh for goodness sake. He sounded like Gollum.

They stayed there for a few minutes in silence, listening for any approaching guards. When they were rather sure they had lost them, Rose turned to the Doctor.

"So where did you park the TARDIS? I lost track after they locked us in."

He looked around for a moment, then gestured to the south. "That way. Right through town. That's going to be a bit of a problem. We might want to wait until nightfall. Less chance of being spotted."

She nodded. Nightfall was only a few minutes away. Her stomach grumbled and she stifled an embarrassed giggle. The situation wasn't as funny when she saw the obvious guilt on the Doctor's face. "I'm sorry, Rose. This was meant to be a relaxing and happy adventure, not a dangerous and scary one." It wasn't at all what he planned for their first date.

Rose looked up at the faint light that remained and estimated they could get moving in a few minutes. "You know, Doctor, I'm really not scared. I don't know what I'm supposed to feel, but I find this adventure fascinating." She glanced at him, deciding it might cheer him up if she flirted a bit. "And my companion is a bit foxy." She winked at him, her hearts jumping when his eyes gleamed in response.

"Weeeell, you know, this regeneration was made to be foxy."

She laughed. "Well, I'm sure there are twelve more where that came from."

He was rather confused at her estimation. He was in his tenth regeneration, so why did she just say he had twelve left? Other Gallifreyans should be able to tell how old he was just by looking at his timelines. Unless…

He examined his biological clock carefully before realizing why he had felt so young lately. He _was_ only on his second regeneration. Rose had turned back the clock on his body, and given him thousands of years left to live. He no longer had to worry about the age gap between them.

He glanced over at his love, and though she had no memory, he was confident she would regain it. He had been reformed and his life molded so that she would fit into it like a jigsaw puzzle piece. If she had done this, then surely she would have left a trigger to release her memory. He just needed to find it.

He was just starting to relax a bit and plan their next move when they heard a bloodcurdling sound from behind them. Rose sat up straight in alarm, not even looking at him before running in the direction of the sound. Now _that_ wasn't what he expected at all. She was running headlong into danger and leaving him behind…wait…

He jumped up from his place under the tree and sprinted after her. "Rose! Wait! It could be dangerous!" he shouted, not particularly caring if the guards found them again, as long as he kept her from reaching whatever danger was ahead. When he caught up to her, she was stooped behind a large bush. She gestured to him to be quiet, and he carefully crouched beside her, peeking through the leaves as she was.

In front of them was a small house, seemingly abandoned and very old for this planet. He estimated it was probably a hundred years old, ivy growing around it and trees poking out of the roof. What caught his attention most, however, was the row of cages along the house. Each of the cages contained a small creature. He turned to the source of the now weak and strangled screams and cries.

The Doctor recognized one of the natives from this planet, a tall man that looked somewhat like an elephant. He was covered with dark brown fur and was dressed in the robes of a merchant. He had his back to them and was currently doing something to the creature in the cage. He heard Rose gasp beside him as he realized what it was he was doing.

He was plucking the feathers from the creature, which the Doctor now recognized as a Balbox from Lak'thi (the planet he had actually _meant_ to go to). Anger welled up inside of him at the sight. As the creature grew slowly weaker, the man filled a bag full of the feathers. Rose shook beside him, and when he glanced at her he saw tears rolling down her face. He laid a hand on her robe-clad shoulder, the electricity buzzing and comforting him by the touch. Rose looked up at him with tears on her cheeks, and they both turned back to the horrible scene.

A small bleeping noise came from the alien's pocket. He retrieved it and began speaking into it.

"Yes, I've almost got them. Well, you'll have to give me a few minutes. Yes, I'll meet you by the fountain. In two hours, yes. I've got to go home and wash first. These disgusting things always get their blood all over me." There was a pause and a grin. "Soon, the two of us will be responsible for the greatest victory of all time."

At this, he closed the bag tightly before swinging it over his shoulder and walking briskly into the trees, heading back to the town. They waited several minutes as his footsteps faded away.

Rose turned to him, tears in her eyes. She had seen worse than this, he knew, but she didn't remember. She was his Rose in all the ways that mattered, but she was still a bit naïve. This Rose had grown up on Gallifrey, well taken care of, though she had never had an easy life. But this Rose had never seen genocide or murder before. She had never stopped a planet from self-destruction. His hearts constricted in his chest, and he knew she needed comfort. He pulled her into an embrace, which she returned. He held her until her shaking stopped, and then found he couldn't quite let go. This didn't worry him much, because she didn't release him either.

"Doctor?" she said softly into his jacket.

He subtly breathed in the scent of her hair as he answered. "Yes, Rose?"

Her grip tightened on him and the electricity zinged through their clothes. "Can we save them?"

He grinned. Yes, definitely the same person in all the ways that mattered. "I've already got a plan."

They pulled apart and she grinned. "So tell me your plan. We've got two hours before he's going to meet someone dodgy at the fountain."

"I like the way you think, Rose Tyler! Now let's go see what we're dealing with." He resisted the urge to hold his hand out to her. He had practically molested her already, by Gallifrey's standards. They really shouldn't be touching _at all_ unless they were married, and only in private.

They entered the clearing, and the Balboxes were looking at them, but making no noise.

"Can we let them out?" she asked, wanting to free them from this horrible place.

The Doctor shook his head sadly. "No, we can't. If that man comes back and sees that anyone has been here, he might hide his whole operation and we won't be able to catch him."

They gazed out of their bars fearfully, and Rose's hearts fell for them. "This isn't how they're supposed to act, is it?" she asked the Doctor, gazing in at one of them and admiring its beautiful red feathers and slim yellow beak. Its golden eyes gazed back at her, fearful.

The Doctor was a few cages over, trying to coax the bird to eat some food he had in his hand. It wouldn't even look at him, and cowered in the corner of his cage. "No, Rose. These are generally friendly and domestic creatures. They love people, and they absolutely adore circus peanuts."

Rose walked up beside him, looking quizzically at the food in his hand. "Circus peanuts?"

He laughed and offered her one. When she didn't take it, he bit off a piece to show her it was perfectly edible. She was rather hungry, so she took the rest of it and tried it. "It's a bit weird, but good. What is it?"

He closed the door of the cage, leaving a circus peanut in the bottom. The bird leapt on it when the door was closed and it was gone before Rose could blink. The Doctor walked to the door of the small building, explaining the Earth food to her. "Circus peanuts are a human candy. They're squishy and weird, but oddly addicting. You know, I once…" She followed him into the building when his voice stopped abruptly.

"What is it, Doctor?" she asked.

Inside was a long table, covered with flasks and bubbling beakers and tubes. Thousands of colorless feathers littered the floor and a pile of bird bones rested in the corner. She looked at the Doctor's face, and dread pooled in her stomach at the look on his face.

"This is far bigger than the murder of innocent animals. I know what they're doing." He said. His face was dark and his voice had a dangerous edge to it.

"What? What is this? How do we stop it?" she asked, touching his elbow gently. She didn't like the look on his face. It made her afraid. He turned to her and his eyes were like a storm.

An echo in the back of her mind startled her…the Oncoming Storm…

She blinked and it was gone.

"These birds are special. They used to be wild, and their feathers were their defense system. They inject poison into attackers. When they were domesticated, the people created a vaccine that would protect them from the poison because they didn't want to take away the birds' ability to protect themselves. They made antivenom instead, and injected themselves with it. The man was taking the feathers to harvest the poison. He's using it to make a more powerful poison, which he will use on the other birds. He's going to breed birds that have no ability to control their release of a more potent poison, and it's going to kill thousands on Lak'thi."

Rose shuddered. "Why?"

"These two planets were once at war. Lak'nar, the one we're on, and Lak'thi, the neighboring one, fought over resources. This planet has food, but almost no water. The other planet has water, but no means to grow food other than potatoes. The people here moved here when their planets were destroyed in the Time War. They needed to make the planets inhabitable, so they fought to gain what they needed. The planets originally fought to take what the other had, but they reached a truce and trade what they need for the sake of preserving their species."

"So why would anyone want to kill the people of Lak'thi?"

His eyes darkened a bit more as he picked up the sheet of formulas and punnett squares full of breeding information and genetic probabilities of a super-bird. "At the end of every war, there are always people who believe they shouldn't have reached a peaceful agreement. There are always people ready to kill to take what they feel should be theirs."

She leaned up to him, making sure he met her eyes. Her jaw was set, and she was determined. "Then let's stop them."

His mouth tightened and he nodded. "First, we have to get back to the TARDIS and move it somewhere hidden, so we can get back to it without having to go through a populated area."

She nodded and they went back outside. As they turned to run back to the TARDIS, she paused. A weak noise from behind her made her turn back to the table where one of the birds lay. She had assumed it was dead. She looked down on the bird and its golden eyes looked up at her. "Doctor." She called him over, but he was already there beside her.

He offered it a circus peanut, and it ate greedily from his hand. She looked down at its torn skin. It still had feathers, but the bigger and thicker ones were gone. Those she assumed were the ones with the poison. Its eyes still stared at her and she saw the plea for help. "Can we save it? Please?" she asked him.

He took it up into his arms and turned to the trees, trying to hurry while also trying not to jostle it. "I can't guarantee it will live." He said.

She smiled up at him as they sped through the trees. "It's enough that you try."

They didn't speak for the rest of the journey to the TARDIS. When they got back to the ship, the Doctor went straight to the infirmary, and Rose followed. The Balbox had gotten weaker on the short journey, and he was now unconscious. She watched as he placed it on a padded table, injected it with a blue liquid, and hooked it up to several machines. He spent several minutes analyzing readouts before he mixed something in a bowl and coated its wounds with it. After fastening a cone around its neck to keep it from injuring itself, should it wake up, he turned to her.

"That's all I can do for now. The TARDIS will try and help it all she can, but I'm not promising anything."

She felt warmth grow in her heart for this man, who saved a creature just because she asked him to. What else would he do if she asked? The look in his eyes made her believe he would do anything for her. She placed her hand on his shoulder, greedily enjoying the electric feeling she got from just a touch through his clothes (what would it be like to touch him without them?- she shook that question from her mind quickly, ashamed at herself for the inappropriate thought) and looked him in the eye.

"Thank you, Doctor."

His responding grin made her hearts leap. "Anything for you, Rose."

She blushed at his comment (which was ridiculous, because Gallifreyans do _not_ blush!) and turned towards the door. "Let's go save a planet, shall we?"

He nodded enthusiastically and struck a racing pose. "Race you to the console room?"

She mimicked his stance. "You're on, Time Lord!"

They sprinted through the halls of the TARDIS to the console, crashing through the door in cacophonous laughter. She leapt over the jump seat and was the first to touch the console.

"I won!" She shrieked in victory, laughing.

"You cheated!" he said through his own laughter as he flipped levers and turned dials, moving the TARDIS from where they had landed it to its new position. His hearts were leaping excitedly in his chest, and it wasn't from the friendly race they had just had. It was from the affection he could see in her eyes, and the familiar feeling that was growing between them. Rose may not remember him, but she certainly fancied him. She felt comfortable enough with him to tease him, and that gave him the hope that he desperately needed.

"So, what's the plan now? How do we save the Balboxes and Lak'thi?" she asked.

He checked the monitor to make sure they were alone in the woods he had landed them in before opening the doors and beckoning her to follow.

"Weeeell" he began, navigating through the trees and using his sonic screwdriver to be sure they were alone. "This government is very strict. Any person caught trying to harm another person, especially a resident of Lak'thi, is charged with treason. The punishment for treason is death. This certainly qualifies, so really all we have to do is get them caught, which is why I landed us here." He said this as he pulled back the branches of a bush to bring a large house into view. "This is the Lak'thi embassy. It'll be a bit risky going in here, since it is likely our faces are on their wanted list. Breaking out of jail isn't exactly something they admire here."

Rose felt the adrenaline running through her system at the plan. It was a bit strange that she would find danger this exciting, and have no fear whatsoever. The Doctor had assured her earlier in the cell that the people of this planet didn't execute people who were not from their planet; they sent them back to their home. The worst that could happen is that they would be sent back to Gallifrey. To be honest, Gallifrey didn't really care what the Doctor did, considering he was a hero.

"How are we going to get in?" she asked, ready for the adventure to begin.

He held up his psychic paper, a dangerous grin on his face. "Meet Dr. Smith and his lovely assistant, Rose Tyler, investigators for the Intergalactic Domesticated Species Protection Agency." He put the paper back in his pocket and pulled the branches back for her to step through. "Are you ready, Miss Tyler?"

"Absolutely" she said, and he followed her up to the door of the house. It opened before they could knock, and a grumpy looking guard glared out at them.

"What do you want?" asked the guard, not looking particularly fond of being bothered at this hour.

The Doctor seemed oblivious to his mood and held up the psychic paper. "Hello, I'm Dr. Smith and this is my assistant Miss Tyler. We need to speak to the Ambassador."

The guard opened the door a bit more, still grumpy but looking a bit curious. "What is this regarding?" he said, gruffly.

"Top Secret" responded the Doctor, still grinning like an idiot. Rose almost rolled her eyes. Yeah, that excitement was subtle.

Oh? Sarcasm? Since when did she use that? This man was making her behave strangely.

They were escorted into the building and into the Ambassador's bedchambers, where he had just been getting ready for bed. With a flash of the psychic paper, the tired eyes of the Ambassador, who introduced himself as Bik'landi, popped open and alert.

"How can I help you, Dr. Smith?" he asked.

The Doctor motioned for the guards to leave, and the room was soon empty save the three of them. "I'm afraid my lovely assistant and I have stumbled upon a rather dangerous pair of men. Weeeelll, at least one of them is a man. Haven't actually seen the other one."

Bik'landi frowned. "What do you mean?"

The Doctor explained all they had seen and told the man the rendezvous point. The Ambassador immediately changed into proper clothes and took a score of guards with him to the fountain. The Doctor and Rose followed him there and they paused in the shadows, watching as the men met as planned and the man they had seen in the clearing handed the other a flask of viscous black liquid. The Doctor and Rose stepped out of the shadows, the guards and Ambassador waiting for his signal to arrest.

The Doctor wanted to give them one last chance.

"Hello, gentlemen!" he said, cheerily. The two men started, looking with alarm at the newcomer that was out after curfew.

"Who are you?" one of them shouted, reaching in his pocket. The Doctor had his sonic screwdriver trained on him in an instant. It wasn't a weapon, but the men didn't know that.

"I'm the Doctor. And I do believe that you are about to make a very bad decision."

"You know nothing of us." The other man said. He was bald and wore large glasses on his trunk-like nose.

"Unfortunately for you, I know enough. Stop this plan, now. I'm giving you this one chance. I won't help you after this."

The bald man spoke again. "You are not from here. You don't understand what we've gone through. We never should have ended the war! We could have won! We could have had both planets, but now we have to rely on those _creatures_ for water! It is wrong and must be corrected."

Rose saw the Doctor's eyes harden and felt a shiver up her spine.

_The Oncoming Storm_

And it was gone as soon as it had come, like the last time.

"Then you will face the consequences." He looked at them again, and they could see they had made a grave mistake. "No second chances."

He waved his hand and the guards descended upon the two men.

It was a wonderfully victorious moment until a shout came from the guards that weren't busy arresting the criminals.

"Hey! You two! You're the ones who escaped! Arrest them!"

The Doctor looked at Rose with a grin. "Run!"

And they took off for the TARDIS, outrunning the guards easily and laughing hysterically as they entered the ship.

"So, Rose, shall we go get those birds and take them home?"

She nodded and watched excitedly as he moved the TARDIS to the clearing they had been in only a few hours previously. They quickly collected the cages, moving faster as they heard the sound of the guards coming to clean up the mess. The Doctor knew that the laboratory and bird bones inside would be plenty of evidence, and they soon had all the live birds in the TARDIS. The sounds were getting closer, so he quickly moved the TARDIS into the vortex.

They checked on the Balbox in the infirmary, and he was still alive and healing. The Doctor assured her that he was going to make it. He just needed a bit of rest.

"What do you say we have those chips now?" he said, as her stomach rumbled again.

"I'd love to!" she said excitedly, the sparkle he loved so much back in her eye.

He landed carefully on Lak'thi, making sure of the date and position of the TARDIS before opening the doors. He had landed them in the prettiest place he could think of, hoping to delight Rose and keep this closeness he had gained with her. He was falling in love with her even more, and he knew she was starting to fall for him too. He just wondered how long it would be before she remembered him in her mind, as well as her heart.

Rose stepped out of the doors of the TARDIS, a cage carefully held in her hands. The bird squawked happily at the sight of its home, and she gasped at the beautiful sight. He had landed them in a garden in the center of the city, with beautiful blue and gold flowers all around them. The un was high in the sky and the warmth of it sang along her skin. She opened the cage and the bird flew out, disappearing into the trees with a soft song from its beak.

They released all of the Balbox into the garden before closing the TARDIS door and leaving the garden. He led her down the street and into the small chip shop, her favorite chip shop in the cosmos. She sat at a booth and he ordered for her.

As she popped her first chip into her mouth, she laughed with delight.

"You like it?" he asked, grinning.

She smiled up at him and nodded, eating another. "Well worth the planet-saving."

They ate in relative silence, but the smiles never left their faces. When they were done and walking back to the TARDIS, he turned to her.

"So, care to have lunch with me tomorrow?"

She laughed. "Absolutely!"

His hearts leapt with excitement as they entered the ship and he put in the coordinates for home, twenty minutes after they had left. He stroked the console gently and thanked the TARDIS.

Turns out she had taken them to the right destination, after all.

**A/N: I'm so very very sorry for the epically long update time! My life was calm and I had plenty of time to write, and then it exploded! I took a summer class, helped my friend redecorate his room, studied for the PCAT (which I have to take July 20****th****) and I was a bridesmaid in my best friend's wedding. I feel so bad for leaving you for so long! I tried to make it up to you by making this chapter an extra long one. I will try my best to get the next chapter to you all sooner! Let me know what you thought of it! **

**With love, **

**doctorrosetyler**


	7. Bad Wolf

Return To Memory: Chapter 7

Bad Wolf

**A/N: Thank you all so much for the reviews! This story still has a ways to go, and I apologize for the long gaps between updates. I'm not giving up on it, I promise! **

One evening a week later, Rose sat on her bed in her home. Her skin tingled where he had last touched her- just a slight brush of his hand against her cheek as they said goodbye that afternoon. Her hearts jumped as she pictured his face, so handsome and soft with an expression she still couldn't define. Their first date had been an extraordinary disaster. He had ended up on the wrong planet, gotten them arrested, and he'd exposed her to more danger than she had ever seen in her life. But he had been so caring and amazing. He had saved a planet (with her help) and then they had the best lunch she had ever had. Her hearts clenched again.

Every lunch date since then had been extraordinary. They had gone to see the Purple Mountains of Moori, the beautiful Ice Planets of Menteli 6, the floating diner on the far side of the sun; he even made a picnic in the TARDIS in front of the horse head nebula, just as a star was being formed. Everything they had done had been amazing, and she was quickly becoming far more comfortable with him than she should. She still hadn't even told her mum about him, ducking out of the shop quickly for lunch. She knew her mum was curious about where she kept going, as she usually had lunch with her. She just didn't know how she would react to the man she was going with. The Doctor had a title, and she knew that she didn't have the status to rightly be with him. Her mum would certainly chastise her for her foolishness. She shouldn't be letting herself hope for a future with this wonderful man.

She tried to scoff at herself, but it ended up just being a sigh. She was falling in love with a man she had only known for seven days. He seemed to forget himself occasionally, as if he wasn't used to the rules of their society, and sometimes he accidentally touched her skin with his bare hand, and that was definitely inappropriate. He wore the strangest clothes she had ever seen, and he let her into his TARDIS. He had a familiarity with her that she knew he didn't have with anyone else. He looked at her with such a strange expression when they parted for the day, as if he never wanted her to leave. But she didn't mind.

She wanted to touch him. She wanted to hold his hand- felt that she should, but knew that she couldn't. She wanted to live with him in his TARDIS, not just visit it. She felt more comfortable with him than with anyone she had ever met. She knew she was lost to him now. She just prayed that it wasn't a trick. She was already too far in.

The Doctor stood in the infirmary, next to the Balbox they had saved, which Rose had named Mickey (he had laughed so hard, tears had fallen from his eyes…she was still frustrated because she couldn't figure out why he thought that was so funny). The bird was doing much better, his vitals all stable and his feathers beginning to grow back. He looked down at the creature, remembering the adventure he had shared with Rose just a week ago.

She was brilliant. She still didn't remember him, but she was the same in all the ways that mattered. She was calm in the face of danger, she still delighted in running, and she still loved chips. And the most important thing was, deep down, she still seemed to love him. She just didn't know it yet.

He missed her more than anything at the moment. He was still sad that he couldn't have their forever immediately, but was more than grateful for this opportunity to court her properly. And court her he would. Tomorrow they were going for lunch again, and he couldn't wait. He knew, however, that soon he would have to face one of his worst fears…a Gallifreyan Jackie. Rose couldn't hide him from her forever.

Mothers of his species were very intuitive. The second that Jackie met him for real, she would know immediately that he intended to marry her daughter. He only hoped that she was going to be amenable to that. He didn't want to have to face down Jackie if she determined that he wasn't to have her daughter for his wife.

He was much more determined that he _would_ have Rose for his wife. He just hoped that she remembered him before he would have to ask. He couldn't marry her without her knowing all of their history.

He left the infirmary and set the coordinates on the TARDIS for one of Rose's favorite planets. He distinctly remembered her eyeing a particular item at a bazaar a few months ago. When he landed, he hopped out of the TARDIS and headed straight for the stand. He was going to court her like royalty. He picked up the item and paid for it, going over his request speech in his mind. If it came up, he was going to be prepared to announce his intentions to Rose's mother properly. His Rose deserved an honorable man, and he would be that for her this time around.

Rose sighed as she stood at the register, begging time to speed up so that she could go to lunch. It had been hours since she had seen his face, and that was already too long. (She chastised herself for being so sappy over a man she hardly knew, but then she thought of his smile and was completely melty over him again.) Her mum kept shooting her strange glances, obviously suspicious that something was going on with her. She wasn't quite ready to tell her that she was falling in love with the Doctor- possibly the most famous man on Gallifrey. Her mum would think she had gone mad for even entertaining fantasies of this man loving her.

But, from the look in his eyes, perhaps he already loved her.

She counted the minutes carefully in her head until lunch, when she saw him appear in the shop. He was more handsome than he was yesterday, though he was still wearing the same thing. (She had started wearing her best clothes to work, which had increased her mum's suspicion even more. It had been worth it because she wanted to look beautiful for him.) He was right on time, as she expected him to be. She quickly checked out the last customer in her line and hollered to her mum in the back "Going to lunch, see you later mum, bye!". Before her mum got a chance to say anything, Rose grabbed the Doctor's sleeve and hauled him out of the shop. He chuckled at her antics.

"What?" she asked, offended.

He shook his head. "You're hiding me from your mother."

"Well, she would ask questions." She defended.

He lifted his hand as though to touch her face, but aborted the motion and worried his hair with it. "Is that really a bad thing?" he raised an eyebrow.

They began to walk toward the TARDIS and she resisted the urge to slip her hand into his. "I don't really know the answers to the questions I think she would ask."

As they approached the blue box, the key on her neck warmed her skin again, a sensation that was growing increasingly familiar. Curious, that it would happen every time she neared his ship. Perhaps her key had been to a TARDIS? A chime sounded in greeting as she walked through the doors and up the ramp, still feeling that strange sense of belonging in a place that wasn't hers. He started around the console, changing the settings to wherever he was taking them now. "And what questions would she be asking, Rose?" he asked gently.

She looked up at him, the questions her mother would be asking suddenly far less important than the question she had herself. She was already in far too deep, and she needed assurance from him that what they were doing wouldn't end in heartache. He was far above her in social status. She didn't understand why he would even be talking to her. What interest could he really have in a shop girl from the lower class? "What are your intentions, Doctor? Why are you taking me out for lunch and all of this? You don't even know me. Not really. And we're from two very different parts of this society. You shouldn't even be talking to me like this."

He wanted to laugh off her question, because he really _did_ know her. Not in the biblical sense, of course, but he knew her and loved her more than she knew. Her unintentional accusation stung, but he couldn't let on. He kept having to remind himself that her mind didn't remember him, and the ease of their relationship was probably frightening for her. And as for the class difference? That was her own fault, really. She didn't have to make him a hero. He flipped the brake off and walked to her, standing in her personal space, but not so close as to frighten her away. He would be direct with her, so that she would have no doubts in her mind as to his feelings for her. This second chance was not to be wasted. "I am courting you, Rose."

She blinked. It wasn't as if she hadn't _known_ he was courting her. He was doing all of the things a Gallifreyan man should do when courting. He walked on her right side (family and friends walked on the left, courting partners walked on the right- though she hadn't noticed until this moment), he bought her food, he opened doors for her, he paid her the utmost respect in every way. She just hadn't expected him to be so blunt. Something told her that he was more of a 'skirting the issue' kind of man. "Oh." She replied, after a somewhat long silence. She tried to hold back a smile, but it stretched across her face just the same.

He stepped just a bit closer and raised his hand to almost touch her face. She could feel the heat from his skin, just millimeters away. He wanted to touch her, she knew, but he was holding back out of respect for her. The problem was that she wanted him to close the gap between her skin and his hand. She wanted him to fully touch her, so that she could feel the electricity that was sparking in his eyes. She saw a depth in his gaze that promised forever, though how he could feel this way about her after such a short time was incomprehensible to her.

Oh, screw it. Her hearts knew this man. This was the kind of love she and her friends had dreamed about when they were little girls. This was a fairytale, and she had found her prince.

His hand remained there as he looked into her eyes, searching for something. She offered everything she could to him with her own eyes. "And then, Rose, if you can find yourself loving me, then I intend to marry you and spend forever with you in my arms."

_Forever in an orange sunset, his hand in hers and their eyes meet._

She blinked and she was back in the TARDIS, so close to being in his arms but so far away. Her hearts beat furiously in her chest and her lungs strained to move. His breath brushed her lips and she wanted to kiss him. Briefly horrified at this incredibly inappropriate thought, she drew in a slight gasp. His eyes were warm…

_His eyes were warm, lit by the glow of the dying sun across the ocean. The creatures flying above them dove and sang gracefully, and he smiled. _

"_How long are you gonna stay with me?"_

_Her own lips replied "Forever"_

She reeled back from the force of the vision, the spell broken by the TARDIS's landing and the reality of his proximity. He stayed where he was, though he wanted to reach out for her and hold her.

For a brief moment, there had been recognition in her gaze and her lips had breathed 'forever'.

She would remember him, he thought as he moved away and pulled the brake. He just hoped it would be soon. They spun into the vortex, and as he glanced over at her dazed expression he hoped he hadn't been _too_ blunt. She had seemed a bit…worried for a moment.

Rose shook her head, warding off the images that flashed through her mind. She had only known the Doctor for a week, and he had never taken her to anywhere like that. He certainly never held her hand like that. He had only shown her the utmost respect, and he would never dishonor her virtue by touching her skin so casually. The few times they had touched (though even the smallest touch was wildly inappropriate, regardless of the fact that she wanted it, too) he had done so gently and quickly; a fleeting brush of his fingertips to her face, or an accidental graze of his elbow. Her vision disturbed her, and she wondered at what kind of person she was if her imagination was bringing something so intense to her mind.

There was something so incredibly right about it, though. If he asked her now, she would have the same answer. She would undoubtedly stay with him forever. He had only to ask.

They landed at their destination, and the Doctor hopped excitedly to the door. "Rose, you are going to love this!"

She joined him excitedly, having shaken herself out of her brief trance. "Where are we?" she asked. He only smiled and opened the doors.

They stepped outside into a beautiful garden, with flowers everywhere. They were red, pink, and yellow, and colorful butterflies fluttered about. She had never seen something so beautiful, but the place was very familiar. The Doctor watched her expression hopefully, looking for a glimpse of recognition.

"What is this place? It's beautiful." She breathed, touching one of the flowers.

"We are on Earth." He said softly, guiding her around a hedge, where a large fountain trickled gently and the water glinted in the sun.

"Earth?" she said, feeling the word roll off of her tongue. There was something about it…something so familiar. But she was sure she had never heard it before, and he had never brought her here.

He grinned at her confusion, knowing that she recognized the place, deep down. "And these" he said, as he gently brushed his fingers against a flower "are called Roses".

She smiled at that, touching the flower he already held in his fingers. It was blood red and beautiful. She leaned in gently to smell it, and its fragrance reminded her of coming home. "They're beautiful" she said, smiling softly up at him.

He brought his hand up as if to brush her face, but did not. She felt the warmth of his hand as she had earlier, and she gazed up into his eyes. "They're named after you," he said.

She blushed at his flattery and they continued down the path. Soon they left the relative quiet of the garden and she began to hear the chatter of children. There were strange sounds all around and delicious (and some not so delicious) smells met her nose. They stepped out of the maze-like rose garden and into a large square. There were tall trees that stuck out through the concrete, providing shade to the various passersby. She heard a loud roar off to her left, and she jumped, startled. The Doctor chuckled and put his hand on her back (the electricity from his touch zinged through the fabric of her dress, but they both pretended not to notice) to lead her over to the source of the noise.

She stared at the beast behind the bars of the cage; its golden mane shimmered in the light that filtered through the trees. "What is that?" she asked. She was amazed at this place; she had never seen anything like it.

He chuckled. "That is a lion. King of the jungle!" He laughed, clearly delighting in his own private joke.

She laughed with him, though she didn't know what was funny. His delight was contagious and she couldn't help but rejoice with him. "So, what is this place called?"

He led her to another cage, where a tiger stood proudly. He answered her. "This is a zoo. They have hundreds of animals native to this planet here."

She watched the tiger in awe, the strength and beauty of the creature making her breath catch as its eyes glittered in the sunlight. "A zoo. Are the animals happy in those cages?" she asked, eyeing the small enclosure.

He pointed to a sign, which read "Tiger will be returned to its habitat area after one hour." She smiled and they continued through the zoo. He told her unusual facts about them and told magnificent stories, which earned them a few glances from passersby. They got to the wolf cage, and Rose stepped up closer to the cage. There were three of them in the enclosure, one sleeping against a rock.

She looked at them carefully, feeling a bit strange. Then the visions came again.

_Golden light, power, all of existence in her head._

"That wolf." She whispered. The Doctor heard her, and placed his hand on her shoulder. "What is it, Rose?"

_A man in a leather jacket, from the north. His blue eyes piercing and afraid as she lifted her hands. She took his enemies and brought life to his friend. _

'_My Doctor', she had cried._

_His lips were warm and the piercing gold faded to a calming black._

"That wolf" she repeated. His fingers tightened on her shoulder, but he remained silent.

"It's bad." She said softly. The vision faded and she shook her head. Turning to look at the Doctor, she stepped back at the look on his face. It was hopeful, and yet it was afraid. She could see the man in her vision within his eyes. It had felt so real, like a memory. But it couldn't be a memory.

She wondered what the Doctor's previous regeneration looked like, and if he had worn a leather jacket. 

**A/N: So, what did you think? I'm already working on the next chapter, so hopefully it will be up soon. Reviews always help me write better! **

**With love,**

**doctorrosetyler**


	8. Hwhat!

Return to Memory

Chapter 8 : Hwhat?

Rose nibbled on the candyfloss the Doctor had bought for her, gazing intently at the wolf cage. They had been all around the zoo, looking at every animal in the place. They had been there for over four hours. She grinned, thinking about how long her lunches really were. She supposed that was one of the perks of having lunch dates in a TARDIS. Her mum thought she was only gone for an hour, and sometimes she and the Doctor were gone for an entire day. It was getting difficult to keep her own timeline straight. She had only known the Doctor for a week, but the amount of time they had spent together added up to much longer than that.

In all consideration, though, she _still_ didn't think she had known him long enough to be feeling as strongly about him as she did.

One of the wolves in the cage locked eyes with her, and her thought froze. There was something about this exhibit that she couldn't quite tear herself away from. The Doctor was nearby, chatting with one of the other visitors. He kept shooting her worried looks, though, and it was making her more than a little uneasy.

Why had he gotten so tense when she had talked about the bad wolf? She didn't know what it was, but there was just something about the animal that continued to stare at her through the bars that was very, very bad.

But then, it also seemed like it knew what she was feeling. She was connected to it somehow.

She finally tore herself away from the wolves to stand near the Doctor. He seemed to relax as she stood by his side; he reached over her head and stole a piece of her candyfloss and shoved it into his mouth.

"Rude." She teased.

"And not ginger!" he replied.

She looked at him with a confused expression, and he was reminded that she didn't remember the joke.

The man that he had been talking to left, after another few minutes of intense discussion about the importance of bananas. Rose was beginning to see that this was an obsession with him. She was willing to bet that there were probably several in his pockets. The Doctor turned to her, still grinning widely after having discussed one of his favorite subjects.

"Ready to go back, Rose? Or, if you're not, we could go to the music festival of Scarbrothae! It's a bit irritating after a while, but they have flutes that play themselves! Imagine, Rose, sentient instruments!"

She laughed at his excited tone, despite the niggling feeling that something was missing. It seemed that whenever she was with him, everything fell into place. She thought of his intense gaze in the TARDIS earlier, the look in his eyes when he announced his intentions to her. She had never imagined that she would have a man look at her that way. Plain old Rose Tyler, shopgirl, had a courting partner. She grinned at the thought as he babbled on excitedly about how the Scarbrothians raised their sentient instruments in plant nurseries, where they could learn how to photosynthesize.

As he led her away from the zoo, he continued to talk and she continued to imagine what it would be like to hold his hand.

The Doctor wasn't sure whether to be excited or concerned at recent events. Every once in a while, Rose would pause and get this far away look in her eyes. He could swear he had seen a glimpse of recognition in them earlier. And he didn't know what to make of her earlier statement.

A bad wolf. Those words coming from her lips had left his hearts stuttering to catch up, and he wasn't sure if he should be afraid of the phrase. Rose was the bad wolf, and she had scattered the words throughout time and space. Was the phrase an echo, or was it a reassurance?

He tried his best not to worry and kept his concern hidden from Rose in a way that she would have instantly seen through before. He began to babble incessantly. It was his way of coping, and his beautiful Rose only listened intently to what he had to say. She didn't search his gaze for hints as to what was troubling him, nor did she take his hand. Sorrow pulled at his hearts at this, but he knew it wasn't her fault. The love in her eyes when she looked at him helped ease the pain of her amnesia. They wound their way back to the TARDIS in the darkening evening.

The ship welcomed them back with a chime and he heard Rose sigh beside him. He quickly went to the controls and sent them into the vortex. He knew it was time to ask her if they could take the next step in their relationship. He wanted to go public with their relationship before his classes at the university began the next week. It was time to ask if he could announce his intentions to her mother.

He swallowed nervously, glancing over at her. She was situated comfortably on the captain's chair, gazing intently at something in a magazine from one of the third system of Kilen's planets. He took a deep breath to calm his hearts and went to sit next to her.

"Rose?" he said softly.

She looked up at him, her brow furrowed at his tone. "Yeah? Something wrong, Doctor?"

He shook his head, forcing a smile through his nerves. "No, no, not at all. I just wanted to talk to you about something."

She put the magazine down, shifting to face him in the chair. Her knee brushed his leg and he suppressed a shiver at the spark between them. "What is it?" she asked.

He looked at her cautiously, trying to phrase things perfectly. "Well, I told you my intentions earlier."

Her eyes widened at the memory, her hearts quickening in anticipation for where this conversation was going. "Yes, you did."

He tried to keep his hands from shaking by clenching them in his lap. It wasn't quite working. "And do you accept those intentions?"

She gasped quietly. This was the first step of a formal courting. He really was serious. She had hoped he would do this, but didn't dare to invest too much into that dream. It went against everything she knew of their society. She looked him in the eye and the intensity she found there made her breath catch. He was asking her the one question she had never dreamed she would be asked by a man that made her feel like the universe would implode if she were not with him. She could really only give him one answer. "Yes."

A grin spread across his face, his eyes lighting with a happiness she hadn't yet seen in him. "Well, that's just brilliant!" he couldn't help but exclaim.

Rose laughed at that, blushing sweetly. "So, does that make us official courting partners?"

His smile dimmed a bit, worry flitting across his face. "Not…yet."

His response worried her a bit. He had asked, she accepted, what else was there to do? She was never very familiar with the courting laws of Gallifrey. They were for the higher class, and she had never imagined that any man with respectable stature would give her a second glance.

And then a funny man in a pinstriped suit stepped into her mum's shop and whisked her away. He had the universe in his eyes and he was offering it all to her.

"Do you want us to be?" she asked, confused and needing him to explain.

His smile widened again and he nodded enthusiastically. "Oh, yes. There's just one problem."

She frowned. "What?"

He took a deep breath. "I have to ask your mother."

She paled at that. Her mother was not the type of person to just accept the Doctor's request. She didn't even know that Rose knew the Doctor, let alone that she had been going on long lunch dates and falling in love with him. How was she going to react to him showing up and asking for her daughter's right side?

"M-my mum?"

He nodded.

"O-ok. When?"

He stood and punched a few buttons on the console. The TARDIS landed and he turned to her with an anxious expression.

"Right now."

She glanced on the monitor and saw that he had landed them only twenty minutes after they had left. He walked down the ramp to the door and turned, waiting patiently for her to move from her spot. She wasn't too inclined to do so just yet.

She was terribly nervous. What if her mum rejected the Doctor? She was already far too in love with him to go with the rules of their society on that matter. She didn't want to go against her mum or the laws of their planet, but if she was faced with a choice she would immediately choose the Doctor.

"What are you thinking?" he asked gently.

She looked up at him. "What if she says no?"

He nodded solemnly, glancing down at his trainers. When he looked back at her, she gasped at the expression on his face. His eyes were dark, intense and beautiful. His mouth was turned slightly upwards in what could almost be called a smile. The look he gave her promised a lifetime of happiness. It spoke of unbelievable passion and overwhelming love, and she wanted nothing more than to drown in his gaze. He spoke softly, reverently. "What if she says yes?"

She stood from her spot and joined him at the door. They stepped into the square together.

Jackie Tyler was having the most peculiar of days. She kept having this nagging feeling that she was forgetting something. That morning, as she was getting ready for her day, she had reached for a tie for her hair. Her hand had reached out for the top of her dresser, but had found nothing but air. She had looked to her right, only to see that she had never had a dresser there to begin with.

The same thing had happened when coming to work. She had looked all around her small home to find some keys. She couldn't remember why she needed the keys, only that she needed them to leave for work. She eventually aborted her search, frustrated further by the nagging feeling. This continued throughout the day.

Her daughter had left that day for lunch, just as she had every day for the past week. It was very strange, the way she kept disappearing at lunchtime. They usually ate together. Rose had started wearing her best clothes to work, was eager to get up in the morning when she usually tried her best to stay in bed as long as possible. She had a beautiful glow about her face and Jackie feared its origins. She knew that glow.

She had looked like that when Rose's father had started courting her.

She had continued on with her day, closing up the shop for her lunch break. It wasn't until Rose entered the shop with a man in a pinstripe suit that everything fell into place.

As they entered the shop, Rose was positively panicking in her mind. She was terrified of introducing the Doctor to her mum. She had a horrible feeling that it was going to go badly. She only hoped her feeling was wrong.

Her mum was eating at the back of the shop, at the counter next to the register. She looked up when they came in, and immediately her eyes went to the Doctor. She froze for a moment and a strange expression crossed her face. Then her mum looked her in the eye, and Rose knew that her mum knew what was going on.

The Doctor was terribly nervous. He didn't know what he would do if Jackie said no. He wouldn't stop seeing Rose, but he didn't want to ask her to choose between her mum and him, especially when she got her memories back.

He could tell that her mum knew the instant she looked at him what was going on. When they reached the back of the shop, Jackie stood.

"Hello, Doctor." She said politely. It was no surprise that she knew who he was. Everyone did.

He tried to smile, he really did, but he was far too nervous. "Madame Tyler." He addressed her formally.

Rose tried to decide whether she should intervene or just allow them to meet each other. Her mum certainly knew what was goin g on between them.

"Rose, mind the shop." She said.

Rose frowned. "What? It's closed for lunch."

"Re-open it. I need to have a word with the Doctor. Alone."

The Doctor shot her a look that said it was okay, so she obeyed her mum and began to re-open the shop. Jackie led the Doctor into the back room.

The back room was dingy and dark, but not necessarily as menacing as it seemed in the doorway. There were friendly items here and there, and the Doctor had to admit (if only to himself) that this encounter seemed a lot less scary with the stuffed animals looking at him over the top of a box. Jackie cleared her throat for his attention, adopting what he had always believed as her serious pose.

"So, Doctor. Would you like to explain why I have two sets of memories?"

Well, that was certainly not at all what he was expecting. There was really only one response for that.

"Hwhat?"

**A/N: **

**Sorry it took me so ridiculously long to update this fic! I'm trying to write quickly, but classes have started up again and I don't have much time for anything but homework. I'll try to update again as soon as possible! Thank you for reading and let me know what you think!**

**With love,**

**doctorrosetyler**


	9. Impossible

Return to Memory

Chapter 9: Impossible

This was impossible. Completely and utterly impossible. How could Jackie remember him? She was just supposed to be a Gallifreyan woman with a beautiful daughter.

It appeared that Bad Wolf had a different plan.

The Doctor stood there, his mouth gaping like a fish, staring at Jackie with disbelief. He couldn't reply to her question, but she was (for once) patient, and stood there with her arms crossed. He looked at her face. She was slightly younger-looking, she had time lines, and he could tell that she still had mental barriers. She was as much Gallifreyan as he was. But it also appeared that she remembered him.

He realized his mouth was still hanging open, so he closed it gently. He tried to find his voice in the midst of the hope that sprung in his chest. If Jackie could remember him, did that mean that Rose soon would? He tried to pull himself together as Jackie's eyebrow began to twitch, showing her characteristic impatience.

"Well, Doctor? Why do I remember two planets, two homes, two physiologies, two everything? And why are _you_ involved in both of them, you bloody alien?" She shouted at him. The friendly stuffed animals in the box failed to make this encounter seem friendly any longer.

He cleared his throat. Only one thing to do, really. Improvise and babble until she thought he knew what he was talking about. "Oh, well, you know, shock of your daughter finding a courting partner. Could cause hallucinations-"

"Rubbish! What's really going on?" She interrupted angrily.

He should have known better than to try to lie to a Gallifreyan mother. "You remember two lives because you lived them." He replied.

Her anger faded a bit, but she still looked irritated. "Which life is real?"

He looked to the ceiling, attempting an air of confidence. "Weeeell…both of them, really."

"How is that possible?" She was calm now, sitting down on a box. He sat across from her, feeling a bit awkward.

"Rose."

At the mention of her name, both of them quieted. A sort of peace settled over them. Jackie's demeanor settled into one that he recognized, and he felt much more comfortable talking to her. Before Rose had changed everything, he and her mum had actually grown much more comfortable with each other. He had hoped to ask for Rose's hand the next time he visited. Now, he had a similar goal. He just had to go through the Gallifreyan marriage traditions instead of those of Earth.

"What did she do?" Jackie asked softly.

He sighed. "It's a long and involved story."

Jackie glared at him, though he knew there was no real malice in it. "We've got a lot of time, Doctor."

He decided to tell her everything that he knew. It would be wonderful to have someone to share this burden with. "Take a close look at your own timelines. What do they converge on?"

She closed her eyes for a moment, and he saw the faint golden glow of her timelines surround her as she sorted through them. After a few minutes, she opened her eyes. "The Time War."

He nodded solemnly. "And what do you know about me from Gallifrey's history?"

She frowned. "You're the hero. You saved us all by stopping the Daleks and returning the vortex to the way it should have been."

A wry smile crossed his lips. "The thing is, Jackie, I'm not the hero. I killed them all. During the Time War. There was no way to end it with everyone alive. There was only one way to destroy the Daleks and stop them from tearing apart the universe. I had to kill them, but by doing that, Gallifrey burned."

She looked at him, silent yet understanding. He continued.

"When you were human, raising your precious Rose on Earth, I was the last of my kind. It wasn't some sad extinction story of being out-competed or killed by another race. I killed my people to stop a war that would have destroyed everything." His voice was beginning to fail him, the feeling of being so alone still fresh in his memory.

Jackie breathed deeply, seeming to sift through her memory to confirm what he had just told her. "I see. And now? What changed? If you killed us all and Gallifrey burned, then how are we all here? And how did I change from a human into a Gallifreyan?"

He glanced at the surprisingly clean floor, afraid to look her in the eye. "Your daughter…" he looked up, and she urged him to continue. "I'm in love with her, Jackie."

She rolled her eyes. "Well, I knew that."

He was glad that she was taking it so well. "We went to visit this temple. She had been acting strange, and I was so tired of avoiding my feelings for her that I decided to tell her how important she was to me. I told her that she was the only thing that had taken away my pain from being alone. I think that's why she did this."

Jackie was getting impatient again. "Did what?"

He took a deep breath. "She made a wish. I can't explain it; I can't even begin to understand it. I think she asked something of the goddess that lived in that temple. I think she asked for Gallifrey back. I think she did this because she didn't want me to be alone." He paused, trying to hide the pain that he felt at her current condition. "And now she doesn't remember who I am. To her, I'm not her best friend. I'm not her love. I'm just a man that is courting her. I don't know what to do." He looked at Jackie, not able to understand why he was telling her all of this. "What if she never remembers me, Jackie? I need my Rose."

Of all the reactions he was expecting, understanding was not one of them. Rose's mum looked at him with such compassion, and it was all he could do to keep the tears in his eyes from falling down his face.

Jackie reached out and laid a hand on his shoulder. The electricity he had with Rose wasn't there, but he felt a strong sense of comfort that he hadn't felt since his own mum had held him as a child. He looked into her eyes and finally lost the battle to his tears as she spoke.

"Doctor, she _does_ love you. She may not know it yet, but her heart knows you and will never forget you. This is your chance to court her properly. Even if she never gets her memories back, she will always be in love with you."

He wiped his tears from his face, embarrassed at having cried in front of _Jackie_, of all people. She continued.

"I have never seen my daughter happier than when she is with you, in either timeline. She loves you, Doctor. Even this Rose that doesn't have those memories still loves you. I would know. I'm her mum. I had love like this once."

A strong peace flowed through him as she spoke, and he knew that, no matter what, it would all be all right. He would marry Rose, whether she remembered him or not, and he would tell her the stories of their adventures. He would not give up on her just because of a memory problem.

She may never remember him, but she would _always_ be his Rose.

He looked up at Jackie and a great smile broke out across his face. "In that case, Jackie, may I have your permission to court your daughter? May I walk on her right side?"

Jackie beamed at him. "Of course you can, you bloody alien. Just treat her right, or I will give you such a smack you'll feel it in your next regeneration!"

He grinned. "You know, you can't really call me an alien anymore. We're the same species."

She glared at him. "I'll call you what I want. Now go make an honest woman out of my daughter."

He bowed in gratitude, as was the tradition. "Thank you, Jackie. I will not waste this chance to be a proper man for Rose."

He turned and left the storeroom, a smiling Jackie behind him.

Rose stood behind the counter, doing her very best to serve her current patron without her attention wandering. The Doctor and her mum had been in the back room for a very long time, and she was getting rather worried. She strained her ears and stretched her telepathy as far as she could, but she could find no clue as to what was occurring on the other side of the door.

What were they talking about?

Were they discussing her future with the Doctor? Were they talking about how long they would court before choosing whether or not to marry? Were they discussing the terms of their courting? Was Jackie telling him how to romance her and love her?

Or was she fighting him every step of the way, refusing to believe that he would court a woman such as her? Was she rejecting his proposal of courtship? The air to her right seemed irreparably empty at that thought, and she felt great despair at the very thought of not seeing the Doctor every day for the rest of her life.

She was both relieved and terrified when the door she had been staring at out of the corner of her eye burst open. She saw the gleeful look on the Doctor's face, and her mum's calm expression and heaved a sigh of relief. So, she would be allowed to be courted by the Doctor?

His eyes locked with hers across the store and she forgot all about the man who was attempting to buy frozen golanka waffles. She watched the Doctor as he approached her, a grin wider than any she had seen on him before. He stood a respectful distance away from her and bowed his head slightly. Her hearts began to pound ferociously in her chest.

"Rose Tyler, would you accompany me to the fountain?" he said, with barely contained joy in his expression.

She nodded enthusiastically and followed him. Her mum grabbed the customer's money out of her hand, though she barely noticed as the Doctor held the door open for her.

Jackie quickly finished the transaction with the customer and shoved a 'closed' sign in front of the register. The remaining people in line groaned until Jackie exclaimed, "My daughter's about to be asked to court and I'm not missin' it!"

The people in the store, also being of the lower class, had never seen an official courting proposal either. They eagerly followed her out of the store to watch from a distance as the Doctor and Rose stood next to the fountain in the middle of the square.

Rose was nervous. Well, she was more than nervous. To be fair, nobody in her class ever courted this way. They went on a few dates and the mothers arranged a dowry for the couple. They were married with little ceremony at the small courthouse down the road and moved on.

But this…the way the Doctor treated her, she could have been royalty. He showed her so much more respect than she felt she deserved. He treated her like she was the noblewoman and he was the lower-working class. He made her feel so special, and she had never thought a man could make her feel this way.

They stood in front of the fountain, and she was well aware that all the eyes in the square were now on herself and the man in front of her. She was a bit embarrassed at all the attention, but then she looked at the Doctor's face and the rest of the world fell away.

The sun was shining through the falling water of the fountain, making the light dance on his face. His impossibly ancient eyes looked at her softly, but there was a power behind them that made her shiver. His mouth quirked in a smile as he looked at her, and she wondered what he was thinking. His face was gentle and peaceful, and he looked like he might be the happiest man alive.

Something flashed in her vision.

_A temple with a golden sunset. A still mirrored pond. His expression soft and beautiful in the dying light._

_Words from his lips that made her heart pound._

_I love you._

_And a kiss. _

She blinked and it was gone, but she knew somehow that this was more than a fantasy. She let herself focus on what might be the most important moment in her life. She could contemplate her visions later.

He grinned at her after a moment, and she wondered why. Then he motioned for her to sit on the side of the fountain. She did this and was surprised to see him get down on his knees on the dirt path. He rested his hands on his legs and sat back on his heels directly in front of her. The light from the water was still reflected on his face. He looked up at her reverently.

"Rose Tyler, I met you a week ago and I am still reeling from your first gaze. I have shown you the things I have to offer you, but I know that they will never be enough. I am not worth your light, but I ask you to forgive me of that debt."

His eyes bored into hers as he began to recite the courting rights.

"I have seen you from afar, and I have exchanged words with you while near. I know you so little from what time I have spent with you, but I wish to know more. I have spoken with your rightful guardian and asked her permission. I have been granted all but one thing I need to complete this happy circumstance."

She felt tears building up in her vision, his words so beautiful and yet she wished he would get to the part that she could say yes.

"Will you grant me the right to touch your hair? To walk on your right side and provide you with the essentials of life? Will you give me the chance to show you the husband I might make, in hopes that you may someday accept me in that position?"

She laughed through her tears, her joy overwhelming. She managed a, rather loud, "Yes!"

He grinned and joined in her laughter. He rose from his knees and dipped one hand in the fountain. She waited patiently, knowing he was not finished.

"Then may I touch your hair with a clean hand, to bless our hope for the future?"

She nodded and closed her eyes as his hand ran through her hair. She felt it slide through the strands gently, and desperately wished he could touch her skin, too. She was still far too aware of the substantial crowd that had gathered to pull his hand to her face like she wanted to.

He sat beside her on the rim of the fountain, and she felt brief disappointment as he dropped his hand from her hair. He met her gaze again and she felt a shot of liquid warmth flow through her body. She couldn't believe this man, who had seemingly fallen from the sky and saved her life, grabbing her hand and telling her to run.

Wait…what?

That wasn't how they met. They met in her mum's shop. Strange. Her mind was making up grand stories. She snapped out of her confusion when the Doctor once again began to speak, though the courting rights were finished.

"May I offer you a token of my affection?"

She wondered why he was still speaking so formally, until she noticed that there was still quite a crowd around them. She nodded, her throat tight with emotion.

He reached into his jacket and pulled out a small box. When he opened it, she heard all the people behind him gasp. When he pulled the shimmering gift from the box, she felt her own breath catch.

"Doctor?" she said softly.

He smiled and held it up for her to see properly. It was a beautiful silver and blue necklace, the metal glistening in the light. The blue stones seemed to have a light of their own and they glowed in the afternoon light. She couldn't believe he had done something like this. This wasn't a gift for her! It couldn't be! It was far too beautiful for a simple shop girl.

Then she saw the look in his eyes and knew he thought more of her than that. She knew he intended to treat her like a queen and she couldn't help her excitement at the prospect. He stood and walked to her mother, who had tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Madame Tyler, would you bless our courtship?" He handed her the necklace, which she took reverently.

Jackie nodded enthusiastically, walking proudly to Rose, who stood. She couldn't believe this was happening, even after the Doctor made his intentions clear. He was going above and beyond the traditions of their society to make her feel special.

She turned away and lifted her hair, so that her mum could put the necklace on more easily. The warm metal hit her skin and she gasped. It felt so light, but she could feel the smooth stones against her collarbone and smiled. She felt her mum secure the clasp, so she dropped her hair and reached forward to feel the stones that rested against her neck. She felt like a queen, and when she glanced at the Doctor, she knew she looked like one.

He held out his hand to her and she walked to his side. He ran his hand through her hair and then dropped it beside him, walking through the opening in the crowd with her at his side. They left the silent group behind them, heading to the TARDIS to discuss their lives in private. The women behind them wept at the display, but none cried as happily as Jackie Tyler. Her daughter was going to have a wonderful courting partner, and then a wonderful husband, in this man. She just hoped her memories would return.

She didn't want to think of what it would do to the Doctor if they didn't.

When they reached the TARDIS, Rose felt in her heart that she was home. She couldn't wait to see what tomorrow would bring.

Her mind flashed again, and she watched the vision with interest.

_A cold, dark room. Hundreds of figures stalking towards her._

_A hand in hers. _

"_Run."_

**A/N: So, what did you think? I wanted to explore the courtship ways of Gallifrey a bit in this one. Let me know what you thought! I love reviews, I really do! I'll try to update again soon! **

**With Love,**

**doctorrosetyler**


	10. Something Forgotten

Return to Memory

Chapter 10: Something Forgotten

By: doctorrosetyler

Disclaimer: I still don't own Doctor Who

The Doctor arrived at his house that evening, grinning from ear to ear. After accepting his proposal to court her, Rose had accompanied him to the TARDIS, where they spent hours just talking. They discussed his past (he made sure to only tell her the parts that she herself created- if he did anything to stimulate her memory prematurely, she could be horribly injured), their adventures, places she wanted to go, and the things they wanted for the future. She was glowingly beautiful that afternoon, with his gift around her neck. It was her happiness, however, that made her radiant.

This woman really was thrilled to be with him. She loved him, and he rejoiced in the fact that she didn't need the memories to love him. She loved him all on her own, and that made him love her even more. He was beginning to look forward to each day with Rose, and not just to those days after she would regain her memory. It didn't matter if she remembered him or not, she would always be the Rose Tyler that he was completely and irrevocably in love with.

Tomorrow, she would move into his home. He would provide her with all of the essentials of life. He would cook for her, buy her clothes, support her hobbies, and everything else she might want or need. They would go on adventures in his TARDIS and after the traditional two months of courtship, he would ask her for her hearts in marriage and her mind in the bonding ceremony.

She had remarked that it all seemed like a fairytale. He had come in and changed her life in the span of only a few days. He agreed with her wholeheartedly, because this was not something that should happen to a war-torn old man like him. He didn't deserve the gift she had given him, and he would certainly never deserve a woman like Rose. She believed him to be the fairy tale. He knew the fairytale was she.

She was the Big Bad Wolf, and he was only a man trapped in a forest. She could destroy him if she wished, but instead her wish was to heal his withered soul and to cradle his hearts lovingly in her hands. He had been called the Oncoming Storm, but he was naught but a breeze in her wake.

He hurried up the stairs to prepare her room. He wouldn't have anything but the best accommodations for her. He chose the room closest to his own, not wanting any more distance between them than was absolutely necessary. He opened the door almost reverently, knowing that tomorrow this room would be home to the woman he loved most. How should he decorate it for her?

His house and the TARDIS, having become fast friends, were both sending him suggestions. He just couldn't seem to decide what to do. Should he decorate it with the ridiculous pink hues she had loved in the past, or should he just leave it with the traditional decorations of Gallifrey? An idea suddenly popped into his head and he sprinted out of her room and into the TARDIS. This was going to take some jiggery pokery.

Rose was excitedly packing her belongings at her mum's house. She couldn't believe that her life had changed so very quickly. One minute she was just a shop girl, and the next she was travelling time and space on her lunch breaks and being courted by a war hero. She reached her hand up to feel the necklace around her neck. It felt warm and there was a gentle and comforting brush against her mind every time she touched it. It was a familiar presence, but it wasn't the Doctor. She wondered what it could be.

She packed her robes in the bag the Doctor had given her. It was dimensionally transcendent, so she would only have to carry one bag when she left tomorrow. She didn't have many belongings to begin with, so it didn't take her long to get everything in order. Her stomach grumbled. The sun was going down outside, and she couldn't help the excitement that bubbled inside her when she thought of what the next sunset would bring. She would be in the same house as her courting partner.

When Rose was done packing, she left her small room to go to the kitchen. Her mum was clattering about making dinner. She felt a small pang of sadness at the thought that this may be the last meal she and her mum shared as they were. This is the way things have been since her dad had passed. She took a moment to savor the last night she would spend with her mum like this. Next time she had dinner at her mum's; she hoped that it would be the night before her wedding.

Her mum looked up from her work and smiled widely at her daughter.

"Oh, sit down sweetheart. I'm just finishing up. It's your favorite!"

Rose smiled at her mum and sat down at the kitchen table. She watched Jackie take the stew off of the stove and ladle it into their bowls. "Thanks, mum."

When her mother looked back up, Rose saw tears in her eyes.

"Oh, Rose, I'm so happy you've found someone. He's going to take wonderful care of you. He loves you already, you know."

She nodded, helping herself to the food placed in front of her. Oh, she loved her mum's stew. It was absolutely her favorite dish. She would have to ask for the recipe so that she could make it for the Doctor.

"I know he loves me, mum. I love him too. It's hard to believe I can love someone so much after such a short time."

Jackie tried her best to agree with that statement. The Doctor had warned her of triggering Rose's memory early. She wanted to remind her daughter that she had been in love with this man for so long, she had been wondering when he would take the next step with her daughter. She wanted to say that she saw the Doctor as a son-in-law, and had for years. But she didn't say any of those things. She simply smiled and took a sip of her stew.

"I'm so proud of you, Rose. Your dad would be, too. He loved you so much."

Rose nodded. "Thanks, mom."

And they ate the rest of their dinner in comfortable silence, savoring this time together.

The morning came, bright and crisp, and Rose greeted it with glee. The breeze through her window woke her with the soft scent of the silver trees and she leapt out of bed, making it carefully. She glanced at the bare shelves and empty walls with a moment of remembrance before hopping into the shower. She used her favorite soaps and lotions before packing them in her bag as well. He would be here soon.

No sooner than she thought this, there was a knock on the front door. She flew to the door, almost knocking her mum over in the process. She flung it open to see the Doctor standing there, beaming at her. In one hand he held a bouquet of beautiful roses and in the other he held a key. She could only stand there and smile as her mum came up behind her.

"What's this, then? You aren't even going to invite him in?" her mum said, with laughter in her voice.

Rose blushed and stepped aside, feeling suddenly shy. Something about today seemed momentous, but she couldn't wrap her mind around it. The key that still hung around her neck warmed slightly. The Doctor glanced down at the key in his hand as he stepped into their living room.

"Jackie, these are for you. I know they won't replace your Rose in your home, but at least it will keep it smelling sweet." He handed her the flowers and Jackie smiled.

"Oh, thank you, sweetheart! I'm just going to go into the kitchen and put these in water."

Rose's mind quirked a bit. Her mum was from Gallifrey. She had never been to Earth, so how would she know what a rose was? She felt like there was something important that she was forgetting…she couldn't quite put her finger on it.

They were alone in the living room now. The tap was running in the kitchen and the Doctor looked at her with a tender expression. He reached up and his eyes turned hopeful.

"May I?" He asked.

She smiled and nodded as he gently ran his fingers through her hair. She closed her eyes and concentrated on the gentle tugging feeling. It was so foreign to have another person touch her so intimately. She loved that it was him.

"Are you ready, Rose?"

She broke out of her trance to look up at his face. She never tired of those ancient eyes.

"For?"

He grinned. "The beginning of our courtship?"

She nodded; wishing the hand that was still stroking her hair would come forward and brush her cheek. She wanted something solid with this man.

He dropped his hand when Jackie returned. "Where is your bag?" he asked. She led him to her room to get it, but before she could pick it up he got it for her. She blushed.

Jackie gave her a hug at the door, and they were soon walking down the road. It would be a sizeable walk to his (and now her) home. It was out in the furthest stretch from the lower class quarters, up a long and winding path. They spent some of the walk in silence, but most of the time they chatted amicably about various things. Rose asked about Mickey.

It took the Doctor a moment to remember that she was talking about Mickey the Balbox, and not Mickey the Idiot. A pang of sadness hit him at that. He wanted to be able to take her back to places they had been, to see people they had known. They had many friends on hundreds of planets. He hated that he had to avoid some of his favorite planets for fear the sudden return of her memory could hurt her.

"Oh, I let him out of the TARDIS yesterday. He seems to have made good friends with my house. He sits in the shower all the time, though. Wails rather dreadfully. He thinks he's singing." He said, with only slight annoyance at the bird.

Rose laughed. "Oh, and like _you_ don't sing in the shower? It sounds like a pack of wild hyenas dying in there! You would think such a distinguished man would be able to carry a tune!"

"Oi!" he said in annoyance before joining her in laughter. His mind was reeling at her last statement, though. He had never showered on the TARDIS when she was there after her memory was lost. She was remembering things, but she just didn't know it.

Their hands brushed between them as they turned the corner to the winding path to his house. The electric feeling jolted through them both, and the Doctor had to physically hold his own hand from taking hers. They had been constantly touching before, and now the desire to just hold her hand was almost a physical ache.

He would resist these urges. He wanted this second chance to court Rose properly, and he would _not_ compromise her honor by taking Husband's Rights if he was not yet her husband.

Their conversation drifted back to the house he could just barely see at the top of the hill.

"How long have you lived here?" asked Rose, genuine curiosity in her voice.

He searched his given memories. "I've been here for about ten years. After the war ended, I wanted to come back to my home. I fought hard to protect it, and I just wanted to settle down for a few years."

She gazed up at the trees as she replied. "You? Settle down? Mr. 'Let's go to a foreign planet and almost get us killed on the first date' wants to have a stable home?" She teased.

He felt a pang at that. He certainly hadn't meant for that to go as it had, but it had all sorted itself in the end. He doubted Rose would have been as impressed if he had only taken her to a chippy to make awkward conversation for an hour before returning her home. He turned his eyes to meet hers, and with his heart in his throat, he said "With the right woman, I would remain stationary and domestic for the rest of my life."

She felt her breath hitch at the intensity in his eyes and knew that he was most certainly not lying to her. Could that woman, perhaps, be her?

Her right hand itched and felt empty. She still didn't quite know why.

That was a lie. She knew exactly why. Her lips tingled for the same reason.

The house was coming into her view and Rose couldn't help but gasp at the beauty of it. The bright colors, the silver vines, the lush garden in the front all brought to her a feeling of warmth and security. This would be her home. She felt the same warmth in her mind as she did when she touched the necklace.

As they approached the door, the Doctor stopped her with a gentle touch to her back. The spark from the contact carried through her clothes and she felt goosebumps rise on her skin. She turned to him and then looked down.

He was holding out his hand, and in it was the key he had been carrying.

"This is yours. Because this is your home now, you deserve the key." He smiled gently and she took the key from his hand. Again their skin brushed and her breath hitched. Wordlessly, she turned to the door and slid the key into the lock. It turned easily and she pulled the large, wooden door.

Her first step into the house brought a wave of nostalgia. The hues of gold and orange throughout the entryway felt like the entrance to the TARDIS, and she couldn't help but feel like she was _finally_ home. She felt a gentle brush against her mind and knew it was the house and the TARDIS speaking to her. The blue ship must be somewhere in the house, she thought to herself.

"Welcome to your new home" his voice said. It startled her slightly, so enthralled was she with the house.

She looked back at him and couldn't quite read his expression. "Care to give me the tour?" she asked, her tongue unconsciously poking out between her teeth.

He grinned and closed the door behind them, sweeping her out into the living room. As she took in the view out the windows, she heard an energetic squawk. Mickey the Balbox flew excitedly into the room and landed on the sofa in front of her, his newly-grown feathers glistening in the morning light.

"Hi, Mickey!" she said, reaching out to gently pet his head. He closed his golden eyes and made a contented sound in his throat. She felt the Doctor come up behind her.

"Oh, yes, lovely Mickey-boy!" he chuckled deep in his throat for reasons Rose still did not understand; "He's looking rather good, isn't he?"

She remembered the state they had found him in only a short time ago, and her heart warmed at the memory of the Doctor caring for him simply because she asked him to. "He is. How did he heal so fast?"

She almost regretted asking the question when he drew a deep breath. Oh no, she thought. Here goes a mile-long explanation. "Weeelll, you see he was in the TARDIS…" she tried to listen, she really did. She sort of tuned him out when she caught sight of the kitchen.

As he rambled on, she began to explore the vast room. The countertops were a deep black and all of the appliances were the same color as the TARDIS console. The cabinets were all a chocolate wood color and one wall was made completely of glass with a view of the glowing citadel. The room spoke of riches beyond anything she could dream. Was this really going to be her home?

She felt a brief wash of fear, and it was like a bucket of cold water was dumped on her head. She grew up in a small house. She was a shop girl of the lower class. Her robes, though nicer than some, were rags to the people the Doctor should be associating with. She couldn't fit in here. She didn't deserve to be his courting partner. Her hand drifted up to the necklace around her neck, the one that sparkled with unearthly beauty. His gift was fit for a queen, and he had given it to a peasant. Tears came to her eyes. Soon he would realize that and take her home.

Still in a rather epic ramble, the Doctor came up beside her and gestured excitedly at the landscape before turning to her. At the sight of the tears in her eyes, his words faltered and died. His hearts jumped into overdrive, his mind racing. Had she changed her mind? Did she not want to be with him anymore? He had just been in heaven, everything was going well, he was going to get her back. Her memories were going to return and he was going to marry her and they were going to live happily ever after. Did she no longer want that?

"Rose…what's wrong?" He wanted to take her hand, brush her cheek, hold her in his arms, but he could do none of those things. She turned to him with a defeated expression he had never before seen on her face.

"I'm not…I don't belong here." She said softly, and his hearts dropped. He stepped forward, feeling his dreams leaving him.

"What are you talking about, of course you do!" He shouted, desperate to fix whatever he had done to push her away. He reached up to touch her hair, the only thing he could honorably to do solidify a connection he was terrified to lose.

She backed away from his touch, and he couldn't breathe.

"No, Doctor. I'm…I'm a shop girl. I won't fit in to your world. This is too much like a fairy tale to be real." Her eyes turned to the window. How could she be so foolish to follow along with this?

"Rose, you're wrong. You deserve everything I have and more. Please, don't do this." His desperate words were all he had to keep her here, and they didn't feel nearly as powerful as he needed them to be.

She looked back at him, and he could see that she definitely loved him still. She was hurting horribly and he didn't know how to fix it, what he had done to suddenly warrant this sort of reaction from her. "I'm only...me. Everything I own is in that suitcase, and everything I'll ever be is right here. Your friends, the people at your workplace, they will all see that the moment they look at me. What makes me different? Why do you want me?"

There were words he wanted to say. He wanted to say that he wanted her because she was Rose, because she took in all of time to save his life and then gave everything to make him happy. He wanted to say that it was he that did not deserve her, and he would do his best to deserve her every second of every day. He wanted to grab her hand and forget it all, tell her to run. He couldn't do that. She wouldn't remember the day she gave her life for his, the day he let a reaper devour him to protect her, the countless adventures they had shared, or that one beautiful kiss at the temple. She didn't understand why he seemed to love her so fiercely, when she had only just met him.

He tried one more time to run his fingers through her hair, and this time she let him. She looked at him after a moment, and her eyes widened at the tears making silent tracks down his face. "Rose, you belong with me. If it makes you uncomfortable, I'll get a smaller house; I'll quit my job, but please give it a chance. Give me a chance to prove to you that we belong together. I don't want you for things or for my friends to like you. I want you because you can only be you. I want you because you are Rose. You took my breath away the moment I saw you and I'm still struggling for air."

Rose's hearts were beating out of her chest at his words. His eyes were sincere and his hand in her hair was strong and desperate. She blinked.

_Burning, burning, and fire. Everything cloaked in black smoke. A lone man stands, his faces change but her name passes his lips all the same. She awakes. _

The vision snapped away, and she couldn't remember ever having a dream like the one in the memory just passing her mind. But she knew the man was the Doctor, and she couldn't let him go. Perhaps he truly wanted her because he loved her. Perhaps she was all he wanted. He was certainly all she wanted.

Tears still falling down her face, she nodded. Relief poured out of him in a long sigh, and before she knew it she was pressed against him in a desperate hug. She returned the embrace just as desperately, forgetting how inappropriate it was. His breath against her hair was still stuttering, his hearts beating quickly. She felt warm with him around her, and felt a calm reassurance from his embrace. He would never hurt her.

In a few moments, he remembered himself and pulled back, embarrassed at his horrendously inappropriate behavior. She wiped her tears from her face and gave him a small smile, which made him grin with that touch of manic that made her hearts pound.

"So, Doctor. Where's my room?"

His relieved laugh made her smile wider, and he jumped excitedly.

"Upstairs, my dear. Allons-y!"

**A/N: I am SO, SO, SORRY for the long time it took me to update this! My senior year of college is trying to eat me alive and the Christmas Break has been nonstop as well. I haven't forgotten about this fic, and I'm going to do my best to update more often! Thank you to all my loyal readers and reviewers for being so very patient as I attempt my first full-length fic. I've been writing on this site for just over a year and it means so much to me that all of you still read and review my work! I hope you had a Merry Christmas and may your New Year be filled with joy! (and Billie Piper returning to Doctor Who…(sob)…I miss her…)**

**With Love,**

**doctorrosetyler **


	11. A New Start

Return to Memory

Chapter 11: A New Start

Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who!

Rose lay awake in her bed that night, the Doctor's quiet snores filtering through the wall into her room. Her plush bed was more than comfortable, and the telepathic décor of the room had her drifting in a calming sea of nebulae. It was not any sort of discontent that kept her awake. She simply couldn't sleep.

Here she was, in her new home. Her love slept only one bedroom away, and everything seemed too amazing to be true. She was surrounded by riches, all of which he swore he would give away for her, if she would only stay. She would never ask him to give anything up for her, and she was excited to experience how the upper class lived. She had explored her closet and it had many of the finest robes she had ever seen, which was more than enough to make her fit in with his co-workers and friends.

She knew that it was late, and she wanted to be awake in the morning to cook the Doctor breakfast. She had once cringed at the idea of being so submissive and domestic as to wake early and cook her husband (or courting partner, as it were) a meal before he went off to work. She had never imagined, however, someone as amazing as the Doctor. And she had never dreamed that she would be in love.

It wasn't nervousness about meeting him for lunch at the Academy that kept her awake, for she had already sorted that anxiety and placed it in the back of her mind. It wasn't longing for his touch, as she had already dealt with those thoughts as well. It was something else keeping her mind occupied. There was something important. Something she couldn't remember.

She closed her eyes and tried to force herself into a sleep cycle. Her mind would just have to try and calm itself as she slept. She had to be awake in three hours.

_Tears fell down her face as she looked into the heart of the TARDIS. Everything was gold and it clouded her vision, and there was nothing but the essence of pure time and space. She felt the power flowing through her and she imagined him, her beloved Doctor, surrounded by Daleks. He would face his death. And she would stop it. _

_She stepped out of her confinement, the heart of the TARDIS safely in her mind. The glow was beginning to burn, but she used that to fuel her anger. The Daleks threatened him. And they would die. She waved her hand and it was so. _

_Her friend was dead. She breathed and death no longer held him. _

_Her Doctor was frantic, desperate for her to let go of the power she held. She couldn't hear him, there was a loud ringing in her ears and she couldn't figure out how to let go of a power that could be used to protect him. _

"_I want you safe, my Doctor."_

_Those piercing blue eyes once again held her golden gaze. And then he was coming to her. There were words exchanged, but the gold hurt so badly. She didn't know the words anymore. All she could hear was the song of time and the loud ring of death. Her human body was burning. _

"_I think you need a Doctor."_

_And then he was kissing her. She felt the gold fade from her, and when the burning stopped she kissed him back. His hands were warm on her back, but his mouth was cool against her lips. _

_And it all went black. _

Rose shot up in her bed, awake and gasping for breath. What kind of dream was _that_? She had never had such a creative dream before. The man was the Doctor, she was sure of it now. How did she know what his previous form looked like?

She rubbed her eyes tiredly, and noticed that it was morning. The Doctor's snores continued in the next room, and she quickly got up from her bed and hurried into the bathroom. She knew it would be an hour before he had to wake, and so she hurried about her morning ablutions. Her shower, though warm and relaxing, could not stop her mind from questioning what her dream had meant.

Was it related to the strange visions she had been having? That leather-clad man, with the piercing blue eyes and short hair, must be the Doctor. Her dream-self referred to him as such. And how did she remember two meetings? She distinctly remembered their awkward first encounter in her mum's shop, but at the same time she felt the fear and desperation of the vision-meeting.

The dark basement and the creepy mannequins were as strong in her memory as the awkward chocolate bar conversation. The hand in hers, that rough and calloused hand, was so detailed a texture that it could only be a memory.

She stepped out of the shower and began to dry her hair and moisturize her skin with the opulent lotions and creams the Doctor had bought for her. She determined to put the strange dream and visions out of her mind for now. It bothered her greatly, but she didn't want to bother the Doctor about it before his first day of the semester back at work. Maybe she could speak to him about it this weekend?

When she was satisfied that her skin was thoroughly pampered and her hair looked decent, Rose wandered over to the closet. Which robe should she choose first?

She smiled at a dark pink one, so deep in its hue that it could almost be red. That would be perfect. She put it on, hardly believing that something so beautiful was now hers to wear. She looked in the mirror and thought that she hardly looked herself. The deep color suited her pale skin, the soft fabric falling over one shoulder and leaving the other bare. The fabric clung lightly in the right places, but was still relatively loose. It fell to her bare feet.

She raised her courting gift to her neck and carefully clasped it in place. She thought that she looked suited for a night out on the town, not for simply making breakfast. She had seen how rich women dressed, however, and she wanted to feel what it would be like to wear such elegant clothing just because she could.

She could still hear the Doctor's snores, louder and more obnoxious now. He would be waking soon. She hurried down the stairs to the kitchen, choosing to remain barefoot. She rummaged around the kitchen and found the ingredients she needed. Tying an apron around herself, she set to work.

The Doctor woke slowly, stretching in his bed. It had been a very good night. He hadn't realized quite how much it bothered him sleeping in a separate house from Rose, but now he saw that it did. He hadn't slept so comfortably since she had last slept in the TARDIS with him, before the Temple and her subsequent loss of memory. The gentle hum of her consciousness brushed against him comfortingly through the House's telepathic field. He basked in the feeling before sitting up and rubbing his eyes. He crawled out of bed, jumping into the shower to get ready for his first day back at work.

Though he remembered teaching at the Academy, he had that new job feeling. This new life Rose had built for him was exactly what he wanted. It's not the way he would have lived if his planet had survived, but now he was grateful to have his home back and couldn't help but feel content. He had his planet back. He had a home; the emptiness in his head was replaced by the gentle telepathic presence of his people. Soon, he would have Rose as his wife. He hoped.

He was so grateful to his Rose for returning to him all that he had lost. The horrible guilt for killing his people was still heavy in his hearts, but the pain was eased by the fact that she had undone the worst deed in his entire existence. It would do no good for him to allow himself to drown in guilt for the things he had done and yet not done. He would focus now on giving Rose everything she could ever want or need.

As he exited the shower and dried off, a delectable scent reached his nose. He had thought she was asleep, but now he was beginning to have other suspicions. Was she seriously cooking him breakfast?

He laughed aloud as he dressed, the light feeling prevailing once again. Oh yes, she would be his wife. And she would be so much cheekier when she regained her memory. This Rose was still getting used to him, trying to learn who he was. Their conversation the previous night told him that she was still insecure in her place in his life. He would have to do everything he could to make sure that she understood that he loved her.

There was something inside him that kept him from just coming out and saying it, yet. Those three powerful words "I love you" meant far more to a Gallifreyan than it did to a human. He had told her before that he loved her, and he had felt it in every corner of his being. He loved her in the human sense, the Gallifreyan sense, and all other ways he could love her. He was just nervous to tell her. Perhaps her love for him was still growing.

He came down the stairs, his trainers squeaking conspicuously on the wood floor. He could hear her voice as she worked; humming what she was probably unaware was a 1990's pop song from Earth. He chuckled lightly. Oh, she would always be the same. And he would always love her.

His mouth watered at the scent of the food she was cooking. He smiled and walked into the kitchen as if he hadn't been creeping around in the hallway.

"Good morning, Rose!" He said cheerfully, sitting down at the large island where she was spooning their breakfast onto plates. She looked up and positively beamed at him.

"Good morning, Doctor!"

She pushed his plate across the counter to him before reaching up to the cabinet to get a cup. It was then that he noticed what she was wearing.

His hearts migrated to his throat and no amount of swallowing would move them back into place.

She was positively gorgeous; her hair shining in the morning light that came in through the large window. Her robes fit her beautifully, and the color accentuated the perfect shade of her skin. He had a strong urge to go up behind her and wrap his arms around her. He would drop a kiss to that bit of exposed skin and inhale the fresh scent of her hair. When she turned around he saw the necklace he had given to her laying elegantly around her neck, the beads sliding against skin he longed to run his lips over.

When she placed his drink in front of him, he coughed lightly and tried to rid himself of the feelings coursing through him right now. It wouldn't do to arrive at work in such a state.

She sat across from him, smiling and silent as she waited for him to eat.

Oh, right. He should be eating. Not staring at her like some sort of wild dog.

He glanced down at his plate and laughed with delight before stuffing a bite in his mouth. "Golanka waffles with bananas! Bananas are good, Rose, did you know that?"

She laughed and took a bite of her own food. He was so rude.

_And not ginger._

Ah. So her strange thoughts weren't going to be quiet today after all.

"I did. You have an unhealthy obsession with those things. I would bet there are two or three in your pockets right now."

He stuffed more waffle in his mouth to avoid answering that. It would only end in mocking.

"My obsession is not unhealthy! Bananas are very good for you! All that potassium and…banana…ness…" He trailed off for a moment. "And you know, you should always take a-"

"Banana to a party, I know, Doctor." She laughed lightly and took a sip of her drink.

His mind leapt with hope once again. She remembered that!

They ate in companionable silence for a few minutes. The Doctor soon realized that he needed to leave for work in only two minutes. He didn't want to leave, though. He would have to leave Rose all day long. He wouldn't see her until five that evening. He wasn't looking forward to such a long separation. Only one way to fix that, really.

"So, Rose, do you want to come have lunch with me at the University?" He asked hopefully.

Rose considered that for a brief moment. Of course she wanted to have lunch with him, but was she ready to meet all of his fancy colleagues and students? She had been rejected from that very place. She remembered the judgmental eyes following her down the hallway as she went in for her interview, the hushed whispers and giggles from the girls in fancy robes that looked on her modest clothing as rags. But it would be different this time. She wasn't applying. She didn't care about their acceptance anymore. She just cared about the Doctor's acceptance.

"Sure, Doctor. What time do I meet you?"

He grinned widely and told her to meet him at noon, before shrugging on his coat. He ran his hands through her hair gently before he went, giving Rose a loving look.

As he walked down the drive, he realized he was running very, very late. There was nothing for it, then. He would have to take the TARDIS. Maybe he could take her to their favorite chippy for lunch. Rose would like that.

He hurried to his ship, which he had parked outside, and was greeted with a telepathic hug. It seems like she had missed him as much as he missed her. It was such an impulse to travel that it felt very unreal to be in one place for so long- to have a home.

He set the coordinates for his office and arrived on time, for once.

Unfortunately the TARDIS thought it would be hilarious to land it one room over. In The Master's classroom. Bloody brilliant. Now he was going to have to put up with the teasing all day.

**A/N:** **Hello, lovely readers! I know that this is a somewhat short and uneventful chapter, but the next one will be very interesting, I promise! I sort of rushed this one a bit because there is something very important that I think all people should be aware of (Whether you live in the US or not!). At this moment, the US Congress is considering a bill that could fatally damage the internet itself. It is called SOPA (Stop Online Piracy Act) and PIPA (Protect IP Act). These Acts are meant to target piracy sites and are mainly spearheaded by the Entertainment Industry. Its main goal is to stop piracy by blocking foreign sites that are connected with piracy. The problem with the way they are going about this, however, is by giving big corporations the ability to shut down websites **_**without due process of law!**_** This means that sites like youtube and facebook will be shut down if any one of their users posts copyrighted content. This affects everyone, even if you live outside of the US. Today, January 18****th****, there is an internet-wide protest happening against these acts. Wikipedia has blacked out its site for 24 hours, along with other websites. Because I don't have a website, this is my protest against SOPA and PIPA. If you have time, my beloved readers, please take a moment to educate yourself about this law that could potentially take away your First Amendment Rights and start a trend of government censorship that can only end badly. If you feel the way I do, sign the petition at **/

**Thank you very much for reading and I hope and pray that this bill is stopped and that the people retain the freedom to write fan fiction and post youtube videos. **

**With Love,**

**doctorrosetyler**


	12. A Bad Wolf in Sheep's Clothing

Return To Memory

Chapter 12: A Bad Wolf in Sheep's Clothing

Disclaimer: Seriously, you guys know this by now. I don't own Doctor Who.

Her walk to the Academy was surreal. As she passed people in the streets, they took notice of her. Her flowing robes and bright necklace made her feel out of place as she walked through the market where she had worked every day with her mum. She knew, however, that it wasn't her new clothing that was bringing all of the attention of those around her. She could hear whispers of her relationship with the Doctor in the air, and her social status was the topic of the morning.

She wasn't sure what to do with herself at the moment. More money than she and her mother made in a week was jingling in the pocket of her robes, "spending money" that the Doctor had given her for the day. She would spend it all on her way home from lunch, and a list was already growing in her mind of her poorest friends that could really use the business. She wasn't used to being the center of attention. It made her feel both important and strange at the same time. She hurried a bit, wanting to get to the Academy as soon as possible. The eyes following her, while friendly, were unnerving.

Soon she was out of the lower class area and had entered the upper class neighborhoods around the Academy. Large, gleaming gold houses rose up around her. The red grass was perfectly manicured, the trees all beautifully placed. It was quiet, but the market up ahead at the base of the Academy's large tower was bustling. She adjusted her beautiful magenta robe and tried to tamp down the feeling of displacement. The necklace hummed comfortably on her neck and she tried to focus on that feeling. These people didn't know her and her robes matched their wealth. They wouldn't ridicule her as they had the last time.

She entered the marketplace and all sound ceased. This was what she had feared. She glanced around her, trying to keep her head down. Rose prayed that it wasn't her they were whispering about. The women in the marketplace were all dressed extravagantly, some even less than Rose. How did they know who she was? She felt like a wolf in sheep's clothing.

_A bad wolf._

Oh, hello weird thoughts.

She could her the whispers as she passed a clothing shop. She was almost to the door of the Academy's main tower. She was almost out of this gauntlet from hell. One particularly ghastly woman whispered to the young girl beside her and Rose's ears picked it up.

"That's the peasant girl the Doctor is playing with. Don't worry dear, he must be doing a bit of charity for her. He can't really be courting her with someone as perfect as you around. He'll drop her soon. She's not of the proper station for him to be serious."

Rose was immediately angered. How dare that horrid woman say such things! What she had with the Doctor was real. She hadn't seen him even look at another woman in the time he was with her. It was _her_ that was sleeping in his home, _her_ that he cried for in his kitchen, it was _her_ that he gave his life for!

Well, maybe not that last one. Weird thoughts again.

She couldn't ignore this slander. Without truly thinking through her actions, Rose turned on her heel and faced the snooty and quite plump woman in the horrid lime green robes. (Which, by the way, were about three sizes too small.)

"Excuse me, I couldn't help but overhear-" she managed to get out before the awful woman cut her off.

"Oh, you couldn't, could you? That's all you peasant girls ever do, eavesdrop on the real people." The woman smirked.

Rose stood, astonished. She had been a peasant all her life, but nobody had ever spoken like that to her. "Actually, us "peasant girls" do quite a few other things. But that isn't what I wish to discuss with you."

The woman attempted to cut her off again, but Rose continued quickly.

"My name is Rose Tyler, thank you for asking. I will not answer to "peasant girl." The Doctor is courting me, not 'playing' with me. You hold him in high regards, but you would assault his honor by suggesting that he would do such a thing as pull a cruel joke like that." She glared at the woman, all sorts of awful words (some in languages she recognized, others she didn't) wanting to come out of her mouth. She wanted to prove a point while maintaining a bit of grace in this situation. Shouting uncivilized curses at her would not help her case.

"Well, _Rose_," the lady said with an awfully snooty air, "you are poorly mistaken. I feel sorry for you. You enjoy your time in our society while it lasts. I hope he lets you keep those robes. No other woman would want to wear them after you."

There would be no winning with this woman, and Rose just wanted to get out of the prying eyes of these horrid people. She still couldn't resist one last word as she opened the giant wooden door of the tower.

"Yes, well I feel sorry for _you_. Either you are poorly mistaken as to your dress size or you just stole a spare tire and two melons from some poor vendor."

The door slammed satisfyingly behind her, and Rose could no longer hear the horrified sputters of the woman nor the hushed laughter of the women around her. She leaned back against the cool wood and willed herself not to cry. She really hoped the Doctor never learned of that particular encounter.

_A planet behind her. Earth. A countdown to destruction. _

_"Is that why you wanted a word? You could be flatter. You've got a bit of a chin thing poking out."_

_"I'd rather die than live like you, a bitchy trampoline."_

_The sun burns. The Earth dies. _

_The man in the leather jacket watches skin dry out and burst, his face passive and unforgiving._

_"Help her"_

_He does not. _

She shook herself from her most disturbing recent vision. A burst of fiery red and uproarious laughter came at her from the right and she was swept into an almost violent hug.

"Oh, that was bloody brilliant! I've been waitin' for someone to put that old Gretta in her place! A tire and two melons, ha! What's a tire? Anyway, you said your name was Rose, yeah?"

Rose blinked, surprised at this incredibly friendly woman and a bit overwhelmed with the speed of her speech. "Um, yeah. Rose Tyler. You are?"

The woman smiled widely, her face looking effortlessly pretty as she did so. "Donna. Donna Noble."

Rose smiled back at her. Perhaps she would have friends in this rich world, after all. "It's nice to meet you. How exactly did you hear the...well, I'm not sure what to call it."

Donna gestured to her right. "I work here. I'm the secretary for the Academy. My window was open right next to the whole thing. It's so good to see someone with actual spunk around here. Everybody's so "oh, I'm sorry did I breathe in the wrong direction? Well, that was hardly appropriate". It's so stuffy here."

"I take it you're from the lower class too, then?" Rose asked. "We are the only ones that know how to have fun, after all."

"Oh, yeah. Born and raised in the lower fourth quarter. I think I know you, though. You work at a shop with your mum, right?"

Rose couldn't help a small smile drifting to her face. "Yeah, until recently anyway. The Doctor and I met and, well...life is a bit different now."

Donna smiled even wider, if that was possible. "Oh, you're spaceman's courting partner? That is absolutely brilliant! He told me you were coming today! His classroom is right this way, follow me!"

Rose gladly followed Donna through the large hallways. She remembered the last time she was here. It had been an awful day of rejection and sadness. She had been silent to the judgmental whispers and stares last time. She was just a tiny bit glad she had spoken back to Gretta. Donna broke the silence quickly.

"So, tell me the story! All that bloody spaceman does is blush and talk about you. He won't tell me details, though!"

Rose blushed a bit at that. He talked about her? "Well, he came to the shop and that's how we met. He was so funny, too. I thought he was an idiot at first, because he was asking if we had chocolate and the whole time he was leaning on a big display of it! But then, he smiled and...well, he asked me to go to lunch and I said yes."

Donna sighed and put her arm around Rose's shoulders. "Oh, that's so sweet! He is an idiot, by the way. Especially when he's talking about you. Gets this twinkly look in his eyes and then he starts knocking stuff over and struggling for words. It's adorable and a little bit disgusting."

Rose laughed. "He's...wonderful."

Donna laughed. "Well, here's his room. I think his lecture should just be getting out right now. I've gotta get back to my office, but I hope I see you again soon. Come see me next time you come up here, yeah?"

Rose smiled, feeling like she had a good friend for the first time in a while. "Absolutely." Donna waved goodbye and disappeared down the hall. She stood awkwardly in the hallway for a moment before the doors began to open and students began to file out of the classrooms.

Before she could enter the Doctor's classroom, however, another man with short, blonde hair went in. He was dressed in the professor's robes that everyone but the Doctor seemed to wear.

"Oi, Doctor! Get your bloody annoying ship out of my classroom. It was funny this morning, but now it's just distracting. It keeps making noises during my lectures!"

Rose peeked in through the doorway to see the Doctor trying to conceal a smile at the man. He didn't seem to have noticed her yet.

"But Master, I do believe you said you were holding her hostage! Far be it for me to keep you from your ransom!"

The man, whom Rose assumed was called the Master, made a frustrated noise in the back of his throat. "Keep the good plan period! I don't care. Just get that bloody thing out of my classroom before I take my sonic axe to it!" He stormed out, bumping briefly into Rose as he stomped back into the next room. The Doctor saw her standing outside and his face lit up. She smiled back at him with the same goofy grin. Did he always look like a man in love around her? She dearly hoped so.

"Rose! How are you?" He said enthusiastically. He ran to her and reached his hand up next to her face. She nodded and he ran his fingers lovingly through her hair. She sighed at the feeling and realized that, even though they had only been apart for a few hours, she had missed him dearly.

"I'm good. I met Donna." She said as he gathered his large trench coat. She wondered where they were going to have lunch today.

He grinned at her. "Oh, Donna? She is lovely, isn't she? We'll have to take her in the TARDIS with us sometime, yeah?"

Rose nodded as they left the room and went into the room the Master had burst from earlier. "So, who exactly is the Master?"

The Doctor rolled his eyes. "He's another professor here. We grew up together, even came to the Academy together. He can be a bit of a prat sometimes."

Seeing the welcoming blue of the TARDIS, Rose searched her pocket for the key she used to keep around her neck. She loved the warmth it exuded when she neared the TARDIS. "So, where are we going to lunch today?"

The Doctor smiled as he took out his own TARDIS key and let them in. The familiarity of the welcoming console room and Rose's presence soothed him. He turned to the controls as rose sat on the chair. Where else had they been where they were unlikely to run into anyone? He looked at the controls and realized the TARDIS was low on energy. Hmm...it seemed he had no choice.

"Ever been to Cardiff, Rose?" he asked.

"No." She replied. He could hear the excitement for a new adventure in her voice. He entered the coordinates quickly and held on tightly as the ship began to spin through the vortex towards Cardiff.

As the ship stabilized and flew through the vortex, the Doctor walked to sit next to Rose in the chair. He gazed at her and she looked back, a cute blush coloring her cheeks. Oh, he longed to touch her face and kiss her properly. He remembered their single real kiss at the temple before her wish. He wanted more than anything to have that freedom again. He knew she would let him if he tried to kiss her now, but he wanted to do this right.

Happiness still floated in him as the ship landed, though. Regardless of her memory, Rose was by his side and she loved him. Things were finally looking up.

When he opened the doors, he knew he shouldn't have thought that.

Rose looked outside and saw a large metal room with computers. She peeked out and the Doctor rushed to follow her. She heard a screech and looked up to see a strange creature flying above. She hadn't seen it at the Earth zoo, so what was it?

They heard a series of clicks and Rose looked down once more to see a gun barrel to her face.

"We're really going to need to have a talk about your driving skills." she said to the Doctor.

He wasn't listening, though, because the last person they needed to see was walking through the doors of the Torchwood Hub and had just spotted them.

"Doctor? Rosie!" he shouted and began to run toward them.

This was not going to end well.

**A/N: Hey everyone! Sorry it took me so ridiculously EPICALLY long to post this chapter! I'm back and I'm working on this fic and a few others again! I'm in grad school now and my life is insane, so I'll post as often as I can but it certainly won't be as often as I want to! Reviews do encourage me, though! Thank you so much for sticking with me and this story so long! **

**With love, **

**doctorrosetyler**


	13. A Delicate Balance

Return to Memory

Chapter 13: A Delicate Balance

Disclaimer: I still don't own Doctor Who.

Rose blinked in surprise when she was addressed by a stranger. A man with short, dark hair and a confident grin was running towards the TARDIS with alarming speed. The gun that had been in her face was quickly lowered and she tried to back into the TARDIS to avoid the strange situation that seemed to be arising. The Doctor had gone incredibly tense beside her, and when she glanced at his face, she had never seen him so alarmed. Her head was pounding and everything about the man was so _wrong_. He was a fact, a solid place in time and it hurt her just to look at him. How could he possibly know them? And to address her so informally, he surely knew them. Why couldn't she remember, then? The world blurred for a moment and she was lost in another vision.

_Explosions all around, the air smells like smoke and dust and despair. Her feet dangle high above the ground. She holds on for dear life, looking up at the balloon holding her. _

_A beam of light, a new voice and a friendly face. She trusts him. Lets go and is saved. The man is not impossible then, he is young. A dance in front of a large clock tower and a jealous man in a leather jacket. _

_Time. Golden light and power, familiar power. It haunts her dreams._

_Death. And then life. _

The Doctor was sure that this could not have gone more horribly wrong. Why would the TARDIS land them in here? She knew as well as he the circumstances surrounding Rose's memory. The last thing he wanted was for someone who remembered Rose to be scaring her and jarring her memory too quickly, and Captain Jack Harkness was definitely the last person he had intended to take her to see. He frantically tried to signal to Jack with his eyes to stop, but the man was intent on sweeping them both into one of his monster hugs. In a last, frantic, effort to stop him, the Doctor did one thing he most certainly never did. He reached into Jack's mind and yelled, loudly.

_"STOP!" _Jack did indeed stop at this, and looked at the Doctor with a small measure of alarm.

_"What the hell, Doctor? I'm just giving you guys a hug. I knew you were possessive, but damn..."_

The Doctor glared at him. _"She doesn't know you. And it's important you not make her remember. You could hurt her. I'll explain later"_ The Doctor thanked his lucky stars that 51st century humans were capable of minor telepathy.

Jack's eyebrow furrowed in concern, but he recovered quickly and smiled his most flirtatious grin at Rose.

Who was currently looking at him like a dog listens to a high pitched sound. Her face showed a measure of horror and fear at the man before them, and she was trying to subtly back into the ship. If the Doctor had not been standing behind her, she would have made it.

"Rose? Are you ok?" The Doctor asked, concerned.

Her vision cleared and she looked up at him, disoriented and confused but incredibly grateful that the wrong man had stopped and seemed to be staring at her instead of touching her like she was sure he was going to do earlier. "He's wrong. So wrong, Doctor. How can you stand it? Who is he? Why does he know me?"

Jack took this moment to step in. "Captain Jack Harkness, my lady. At your service."

Rose looked at him with some measure of concern. The Doctor wasn't running, however, and so neither would she. They appeared to be friends. She wouldn't back away from this. She wanted to fit into the Doctor's world. She just wished he had told her she would be meeting a friend. "Rose Tyler. I'm the Doctor's courting partner. And what, may I ask, is your relation?" She reverted to her most formal form of speech, still trying to ascertain the Doctor's opinion on him. He had tensed at first, but was now relaxed. She figured that meant he was safe.

Jack laughed. "Why, Rosie, you don't have to be so formal. I'm the Doctor's brother!"

The Doctor glared at him. Confusing Rose further was not the goal either. He was relieved to see a bit of the old Rose shining through. She didn't seem afraid anymore.

Rose put her hands on her hips. "That is certainly not true. You are not Gallifreyan. I can hear your single heart."

The Doctor laughed at Jack's bemused expression, watching as Jack put his hands over his heart as if he could muffle the sound. "Rose, he's one of my very dear friends. So much so that I call him my brother."

She relaxed a little more and took a few steps toward Jack, bowing slightly. "It is an honor to meet one of my partner's dearest friends." Jack laughed and went to hug her when the Doctor's voice in his head warned him not to touch her, but to bow in return. He did so, sending the Doctor a 'you are so explaining later' glare.

Rose was relieved. Though the man still hurt to look at, she could accept that the Doctor loved him and therefore she would love him, too.

The Doctor needed a moment alone with Jack, so he could explain the situation. He hated to let go of Rose even for a moment, but she couldn't hear this. He hadn't realized until just that moment how desperately he needed someone to talk to, other than Jackie. "Rose, I forgot to mention, there should be some clothes in the wardrobe for you. Would you like to play a little human dress up today?"

She smiled and nodded. The few times they had visited here, she had wondered what wearing the otherworldly clothes would be like. She hurried back into the TARDIS, leaving the Doctor and his brother alone.

For the first time ever, the Doctor was the one that threw his arms around Jack. It had been far too long since he had had a true friend to talk to. He hadn't realized how much he had _missed_ him.

"Whoa, Doctor!" Jack said, while somewhat eagerly returning the hug. "I know I only get handsomer with age, but you're acting a little weird. What's going on? Why doesn't Rose remember me?"

The Doctor sighed, pulling back from the hug. "That's just it, Jack. She doesn't remember me either."

"What? She seems to know you pretty good, Doc. She did call you, what was it? Oh yeah, a 'courting partner'. What was that about? You take her to meet Jane Austen and she got possessed by a book?" he teased.

The Doctor shook his head, once again allowing the magnitude of what Rose had done for him sink in. "No, Jack. She is really my courting partner. She brought it all back, Jack. She brought it all back and she doesn't even know how amazing she is for doing it. She doesn't remember doing it."

Jack frowned and led the Doctor to sit in one of the nearby chairs, sitting next to him. "What did she bring back, Doctor?"

The Doctor looked back up at him, and Jack knew why he seemed different. That never-ending sadness, the dark despair that had always been in his eyes, was gone. And then he answered with such happiness in his voice that Jack's heart leapt for him. "Gallifrey."

"What? Your planet? She brought back an entire planet?" He couldn't believe it. Though she had made him immortal. The things this woman could do. And she had always thought herself not good enough for the Doctor.

"Not just my planet, Jack. My _people_. My friends and my culture. My family. I can feel them all alive in my mind. The beautiful song of the vortex and the protection of Time isn't up to me to handle anymore. She changed _history_, Jack. She erased my greatest regrets and gave me more than I could ever have hoped for." His voice shook.

Jack laughed. "That woman! She's a bloody miracle, isn't she? Then why doesn't she remember?"

The Doctor shook his head. "I don't know, but I have a theory. I think she will remember. Her memories are there. She is mentioning stuff she shouldn't know, saying things that don't make any sense. Sometimes she stares off into space and every time she looks at me as if she has seen something new."

"And how did she know I was human? All she did was look at me." Jack asked.

The Doctor grinned wide. "She's Gallifreyan too, now. And she made me young. You're looking at a Time Lord with 12 regenerations left."

"And why can't I touch her?" He asked.

The Doctor sighed in frustration. "Bloody prudish race, we are. Can't touch members of the opposite sex unless we are married. I asked her to court me, though. Since she said yes, she granted me the right to touch her hair. She moved into my house with me yesterday."

Jack grinned lasciviously. "You allowed to touch _any_ of her hair?" That earned him a glare.

"I'm doing this right, Jack! This is my chance to court her properly. When she remembers, I want her to know that I showed her every respect my culture would give a queen. I love her, more than anything in the universe."

"And you haven't even kissed her yet?" Jack asked, leaning back in the chair.

The Doctor smiled lightly, remembering the temple before her wish. "Yeah. I have. But that was before she did this. Actually about ten minutes before."

"So, when is she going to remember?"

"I'm not sure. She may never remember. But that's ok, because she still loves me. Even though she doesn't remember all the adventures we had before and all of the times we risked our lives for each other, she wants to be with me. That's enough for me." The Doctor said softly. The TARDIS was alerting him that Rose was heading out. He stood from his chair and Jack followed.

"That's good Doctor, but I hope she remembers." He said, giving the Doctor a gentle clap on the back.

"I do too, Jack. I really do."

As Rose headed out of the wardrobe room in an eerily familiar outfit of jeans and a grey hoodie, she got the distinct feeling that she had been sent away. It was not a good feeling. She had spent the past few days in a somewhat hazy euphoria, forgetting part of who she was in a submissive housewife role. It wasn't that she didn't love the Doctor, but she was a strong and intelligent woman and she didn't like the idea of being sent out of the room so the men could talk. She had given up a lot of dreams in her life, but perhaps she didn't have to anymore? She didn't have to work now, not with the Doctor supporting her. Perhaps she could take this opportunity to do something with herself? Perhaps something she had been denied a long time ago?

She heard the Doctor talking to Jack as she neared the doors of the TARDIS and waited a moment before exiting.

"...she wants to be with me. That's enough for me."

"That's good Doctor, but I hope she remembers."

"I do too, Jack. I really do."

What were they talking about? Remember what? A scene suddenly flashed in her mind.

_She pushed up the sleeves of her grey hoodie and grabbed the chain hanging down, swinging herself over and knocking down the dummy, sending the anti-plastic into the pit. The building began to crumble as she found herself in the leather-clad arms of the blue-eyed man she had met the day before. _

_"Now we're in trouble" he said._

_He grabbed her hand and they ran. After that she couldn't stop. _

Were these visions real? Were they memories? If that was the case, why wasn't he telling her about them? Who was he to her, then? What made her forget? Her heart ached horribly at the possibility that the Doctor wasn't who he said he was. Then she remembered his words to Jack. It was enough that she wanted to be with him. Perhaps, then, she wasn't who she thought she was?

She pushed all of this to the back of her mind for now. She would worry about these things later. Her courting partner was waiting and she wanted desperately to see him.

Two hours later, the trio found themselves in a bit of a sticky situation. And Rose was the only one that could save them this time.

**A/N:**

**I feel like every post is an apology for such a long update wait! If it's any consolation, I made straight A's my first semester of Pharmacy School! So let's hope the rest of my 7 remaining semesters go as well! Thanks to all my faithful readers for continuing to read my work :) I'll have a bit more time this Christmas break, so I hope to get a lot of writing done. I'll do my best! **

**With love,**

**Doctorrosetyler**


	14. Time Sense

Return To Memory

Chapter 14: Time Sense

Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who!

Rose licked the last of the salt and vinegar from her fingers, deciding that was the best lunch she had had since beginning her relationship with the Doctor. Walking down the streets of Cardiff with Jack, who she had decided was quite nice if she didn't try to look straight at his timelines, and the Doctor she enjoyed the cool air and the strangely familiar sounds of the 21st century city. The Doctor and Jack were absorbed in a conversation about transdimensional whoosa-whatsits, the Doctor's hand gently threaded through her hair and resting on her upper back as they walked.

It was then that she noticed it. A ripple appeared in her sight, but when she looked it was gone. There was nothing unusual on the street. People were walking about, not having seen anything out of the ordinary. Then was it just her imagination?

Five more minutes passed and just as she was beginning to believe she had imagined the whole thing, the ripple appeared again. She watched as a young boy was taken up in the ripple, his mother releasing his hand and walking along as if nothing at all had happened. The ripple disappeared again and nobody seemed to have noticed anything was amiss.

"Doctor! Did you see that?" she asked in a hushed tone, making the two men stop their conversation and look around, concerned.

"See what, Rose?" he asked, glancing in the direction she was looking.

"Yeah, I didn't see anything." Said Jack, suddenly absorbed with poking buttons on his watch.

"That boy over there. He disappeared and his mum didn't even seem to notice." she said, pointing.

The Doctor looked and saw a woman walking, but no child beside her. "That woman?" he asked.

Rose closed her eyes, trying to remember where the boy had disappeared exactly. She could see it then, the ripple. It wasn't in real space, then. It was...in time?

"Wait, Doctor. You can't see it unless you close your eyes. It's like...I can see it but I can't."

He closed his eyes as she said and could instantly see the ripple. The woman had a complete rip in time and space right next to her. Something that should be there, that had been, was no longer there and she should know. Wait...how did Rose know? She was using a time sense, something that was carefully cultivated and developed over the fifty years of training that Time Lords received at the Academy. Rose had never attended, even as a Gallifreyan. She had been rejected, he had checked the records. How did she use such a developed skill without even knowing it?

There was no time to mull over these things right now. "Come on, let's follow her."

The three of them crossed the street and began following the woman, hoping to gain a bit of insight as to what was going on. Before long the woman got on a bus, which they also boarded (thanks to the use of the Doctor's psychic paper). They watched as she sat down near the back and began to read the paper as if nothing was wrong. The gash in time space next to her was pulsing and almost red, if a color could be ascribed to something one could not truly see. It began to hurt Rose's head. She turned to the Doctor and whispered to him, "Why does it hurt?"

He looked down at her. "What hurts?" he asked, concerned.

She leaned closer to him, seeking comfort as her head started to pound. "The rip. It hurts to look at."

The Doctor frowned. She shouldn't have such a developed time sense. The rip hurt his head too, but it wasn't nearly as painful as it seemed to be for Rose. He could help, but it would be quite improper to do so. He wasn't supposed to come even close to touching her mind. A mental salve would certainly be out of the question. But as tears began to gather in the corner of her eyes, he started to sense her mental distress like a broadcast from her head.

"Rose, I can help you, but it would be a bit...inappropriate." he whispered.

She nodded. "Whatever you can do, just make it stop. It's like there's something in the back of my mind trying to push through and it just...it hurts, Doctor. I've never felt anything like it." Her voice began to rise in pitch and the people on the bus began to look their direction. He gently placed his hand on the small of her back and led her to the stairs of the bus, hoping there wouldn't be an audience on the top deck. Jack followed behind, making a note of the woman they were still attempting to follow. When they got to the top deck he positioned himself at the front window with a view of the door so they would know when the woman got off.

The Doctor led Rose to a nearby seat, glad that there was nobody on the top deck.

"Rose, look at me. You have to look at me, I know it hurts but please try." he said, gently stroking her hair.

She looked up at him through eyes now filling over with tears. "Whatever you have to do, please do it. I don't care if it's inappropriate. We can't help that little boy if I'm like this." she said, trying to keep her voice from breaking. Why was this so painful all of a sudden? She wasn't even looking at the rip anymore.

He was astounded for a moment. She didn't want him to stop the pain just because of the hurt...she was willing to sacrifice part of herself to save the little boy only she had seen. He smiled. His Rose was making her way back to him with every moment.

He took a deep breath. "I have to get into your mind a bit. Just close any doors you don't want me to go through. I'll only go as far as I need to in order to alleviate the pain." he said softly, wishing he didn't have to sacrifice the so far perfect courting. He had done well, for the most part, in following his planet's laws and manners of courtship. This was way beyond what they should be doing at the moment, and despite his guilt, he could not bear to see his Rose in pain.

She nodded at his words and closed her eyes. His fingers gently brushed against her temple, that first touch of his fingers against her bare skin sent a spark through her that, if it weren't for the pain, would have been an immensely pleasurable feeling. She then felt his presence in her mind, like a soft and cool breeze on a hot day. His touch began to soothe the pain wherever it went and she was so overwhelmed with his presence and her very love for him that she couldn't help herself. She opened every single door in her head, wanting to show him, as he healed her, that she trusted him completely.

He could feel his hearts beginning to beat out of his chest. He had to squelch his overwhelming desire to roam around in her now wide open mind. Never in his lives had anyone placed themselves so vulnerably before him, and his physical eyes could see the gentle smile on her face as she did so. How amazing this woman was, to give herself to him so completely when she didn't even know the full extent of what she had already done for him.

He continued to venture carefully through open doors, averting his eyes from what was inside and only trying to find the source of her discomfort. He saw, through the corner of his eye, a large, misty object. It moved about in her head, shining and silver with time. He followed its shadow and was astounded at what he found when he got a good look.

It was a huge, silver wolf. Its eyes blazed with the time vortex itself and where it walked it left a glowing trail of energy.

Bad Wolf.

She was alive and well, and she was protecting a small silver box in the center of a vast, marble room. It was glowing and he could hear whispers of words long ago spoken, his past self and Rose running through a museum with a Dalek on their heels. These were her memories. He approached carefully, but as soon as his foot moved the wolf began to growl.

"It's ok, It's just me. It's the Doctor." he said softly. The wolf calmed and sat carefully beside the box. It looked at him with understanding, but when he took another step it barked a warning. He was not to approach.

There was a lock on the box. There would be no other way to open it but to find the key. But which words were the key? His concentration was interrupted when he heard Jack holler at them.

"Hey Doc, you may want to hurry it up. The last stop is coming up and our lady is probably going to get off."

He had completely forgotten about finding her time sense! He looked around frantically, feeling Rose's forehead begin to sweat under his fingers. She was still in pain while he was exploring about in her head. What a terrible courting partner he was turning out to be! How was he to find her time sense and soothe it in time? He looked to the wolf.

"You know her mind. Please, help me. She hurts and I have to stop it fast."

The wolf stood and walked toward him warily, still keeping in between him and the box. He led the way out and the creature relaxed. It began to run, and the Doctor followed in its glowing trail. They came to a long corridor, at the end of which was a large, red stone. It glowed viciously and he could feel the agitation that came from it. The wolf whined and placed a paw on the surface, as if trying to alleviate the pain. The Doctor followed suit and placed his hand gently on top of the stone. He could feel the pain she was in and it was enormous. Her time sense was well developed but she had no control over how much she sensed. He breathed in deeply and concentrated on soothing the pain. It soon dissipated and he felt her take a deep breath.

The wolf whined gently and placed its ghostly head under his hand. The Doctor glanced down at it while preparing to pull gently out of Rose's mind. "Thank you, friend." he said softly.

He then found himself back on the bus with Rose's head in his hand and the electricity sparking his fingers where he still touched her. She opened her eyes and smiled in relief. He found his own lips curling up too.

"Hey guys. We need to get off. Like, now." Jack said hurriedly.

The Doctor looked to Rose and regretfully removed his fingers from her temple. He instantly missed the connection and part of his mind railed against the loss. "Are you ok to stand?" he asked.

She nodded. "Yeah, let's go!"

They hurried down the stairs after Jack and out the doors just as they were closing behind them. The woman was already halfway down the street by the time they spotted her. Jack glanced down at his watch as they fell into step a ways behind her.

"Guys, I'm picking up some weird signals. It looks almost like a Hycina projection, but they went extinct millennia ago." he tapped his watch to be sure it was reading correctly.

The Doctor looked down. "Hmm...that's odd. So they rip apart time and the rips then emit a projected reality to stabilize the gaps. Perhaps..." he continued on, but Rose tuned him out. They were entering a residential area. Greenwich, she thought. The buildings were a bit run down, but they were approaching some decent flats. The woman entered the gate to a small building and went inside, seemingly unaffected by the events the trio had recently witnessed. The Doctor had his sonic screwdriver out and was buzzing away, trying to figure out where the strange readings were coming from.

Rose realized the boys had no interest in actually asking the woman what was going on. She decided to go ahead and do so herself. As she had learned on the last few lunch dates gone awry, it was best to find out first hand what the affected people experienced. They boys, immersed as they were in their technology and mutterings over various alien species, didn't take notice as she approached the door. She knocked and quickly assumed an official pose.

The woman came to the door, with a tall and somewhat handsome man behind her. "May I help you?" she asked, clearly hesitant.

Rose smiled kindly. "Hello, I'm Rose Tyler and I would like to ask you a few questions about your son."

The woman frowned. "Son? We don't have a son."

Perhaps she had jumped to conclusions then. "Nephew, perhaps? Little brother?" She probed.

The man stepped closer to her. "I'm afraid you are mistaken. We are both only children and we have never had a child." He moved to close the door.

"Wait, sir! I saw your wife with a young boy, and he just disappeared into thin air!" she said, hoping to spark some sort of memory. The woman only became angry.

"Excuse me! You mean to tell me you have been following me? I have seen no such boy today, nor do I know any children." she said, sternly.

"But-"

"Please leave! If you and your strange fellows don't leave immediately, I will call the police!" she shouted, slamming the door in her face.

Rose blinked, confused and more than a little embarrassed as she turned to face her two companions. Jack seemed to be holding back a laugh, while the Doctor appeared to be in deep thought. He turned to leave and she and Jack followed him as he began to babble again.

"Hmm...so what have we got? An alien that steals people, erases them from time, quite messily I may add, and then erases that person from everyone's memories. It's got to be either a Phtalotroch or a Hylin. Or maybe a Utranophile. If only I had thought to grab my new scanner this morning." he grumbled.

Rose took another glance at the house, and then stopped in her tracks.

"Doctor." she said.

"Not now, I'm scanning." he said, once again whipping the sonic about.

"Doctor, you need to look at this."

He sighed and turned to her, his mouth dropping open at what he saw.

"What the hell is that?" asked Jack.

The Doctor placed his hand in Rose's hair once more, the most reassurance of her presence that was proper. "I don't know. But whatever it is, we have to find it soon. Or things will get very, very bad."

They turned and began to run back to the TARDIS, away from the house that was now twisted and distorted like a funhouse mirror. People passed it by, never giving it a second glance. Some noticed it and as soon as the thought crossed their mind that it was strange, they no longer had any recollection that they had seen anything at all.

**A/N: So, what do you all think? I'm going to try and finish this story up if I can. There are only about five or six chapters left, and I have new stories I want to work on too. I have a week until school starts back, so wish me luck in writing (and all my other projects to complete before my life goes all to hell again!) Thank you so much for reading, and thank you to those of you that review my story. It is wonderful encouragement to come on and see so many faithful readers and reviewers. It makes me feel loved :)**

**With love,**

**doctorrosetyler**


	15. Forget Me Not

Return To Memory

Chapter 15: Forget Me Not

Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who. Sadness.

They ran through the streets as the sun began to go down, far too quickly. Just an hour ago it had been noon.

"Something is messing with time here. The rips are supposed to repair themselves, but whoever made them has no idea what they are doing. Or they don't care. Either way, we have to stop them now." The Doctor shouted as they raced down the final few blocks to the Hub, where the TARDIS was still parked. Rose tried to extend her senses to see if she could feel the rips as she had earlier, this time without the pain. She felt three rips nearby, but they were getting smaller. A frown grew on her face as they raced through the doors and up to the console. The Doctor started whirling about the console, frantically pushing buttons and turning levers. A familiar haze began to grow over Rose's eyes.

_He flew around the console, all manic smiles and mad laughter. She felt her single heart skip a beat. _

"_Where are we going?"_

_He grinned and wiggled his fingers for her to take his hand. She did and there was no telepathic tingle, only cool skin and butterflies in her stomach. _

"_Further than we've ever gone before." _

_She laughed with him, following her mad alien out of the ship, the smell of apples wafting in through the open doors. _

There was a theme to these visions. They were memories, she was sure of it now. She glanced at her own timelines and saw extra loops and swirls, more than that of anyone she had ever met. Why had she never noticed that before? Who was she, then? Was she the human in her visions or the Gallifreyan she was now? And why did everything she was seem to center on the Doctor?

"Aha!" The Doctor's shout of discovery brought her out of her thoughts and to the present. She could ponder her visions later. For now she trusted her courting partner with all of her being and she would ask him later what all these visions were. There were lives at stake here.

"What is it, Doc?" Jack asked, walking up behind him and glancing at the monitor as if he could read the complicated Gallifreyan script that scrolled across the screen.

"There are distortions- rips in time-space all over Cardiff. From here I can count exactly seven of them. There may be more. Something is using them somehow, probably as an energy source."

Rose came up behind him, glancing at the monitor herself. "They're shrinking, too. The holes. They are trying to close up." she said, placing her hand on the Doctor's sleeve. The tingle of the touch calmed her nerves, let her know that he was still the same man she trusted so much- the same man that saved a Balbox for her and let her name it Mickey. These visions were really starting to unnerve her.

He looked at her in surprise. "How can you tell they are shrinking?"

She blinked at him in surprise. "I can feel it. Just look at them behind your eyes. They are closing in on themselves."

He nodded and closed his eyes. Jack looked at them in curiosity. Behind his eyes, the Doctor searched for the gaps with his time sense. Sure enough, he felt each gap sucking itself in. It wasn't the gap itself, though. Something was feeding off of the energy. His eyes popped open and he ran over to the access panel to his storage under the grating.

"You're right, Rose. Something is feeding off of these rips in time. If people are disappearing into them, maybe the thing that is creating the gaps is taking the people out of their timelines and feeding off the energy of all the existence they would have had." He paused and looked up at Rose, who continued to astound him with her untrained yet developed senses. Their eyes met and he felt his heart wrench at the thought of one of the rips taking her. "It's erasing people from time. Their friends, families, everything about the lives they led is simply erased. Their loved ones don't know they are gone, don't even remember they existed. They simply vanish from time." He saw her shiver from across the room and ripped his eyes from hers to dig through his gadgets. He knew he had something in here to track down the source of these timey-wimey thieves.

Rose's voice drifted down to him. "And if the gaps close all the way? What will happen then, to the people?"

He found the gadget he was looking for and hopped back up onto the grating, sliding the panel shut. He pulled the sonic out of his pocket and started making adjustments to the device. He didn't want to think about what would happen if they failed. He had Rose by his side. As long as they were together, they would never fail.

She went up to the Doctor, her hand rested on his shoulder and she felt his muscles relax at her touch. "Doctor? What happens if the gaps close?" She asked, though she was pretty sure she already knew the answer.

The Doctor stopped his sonicking and met her eyes. A shiver ran down his spine at the depth of them, but he tamped down his response to her. Now was not the time. "If the gaps close all the way, the people will be lost forever. Their timelines will be erased from the universe. They may still exist, but it will be in a timeless prison. It's like throwing someone into the void, but they still think they are in the real world. They exist, but nobody knows they are there. They'll be forced to be ghosts in their own world, with no afterlife to pass on to and nobody to remember them."

Tears formed in Rose's eyes and she grabbed the sonic from his hands, continuing the adjustments he had just been making. Funny, he didn't think she had even known what the device was. "Then let's save them before that happens, Doctor." she looked up at him from her work and he grinned back at her.

"Yes, let's."

Jack stood by watching the exchange. Rose was a lot more impressive than he had ever given her credit for. He grinned as the Doctor looked at her, completely and obviously smitten. He'd always known that his favorite Time Lord had been head over heels for his companion, but never before had he seen the emotion so openly written on his face. Rose's necklace glittered brilliantly against her skin, a piece far too fancy for the simple earth outfit she was wearing.

Jack smiled widely at the couple as the Doctor murmured instructions to her and wove his hand into her hair. The way they fit together was completely right, and he desperately hoped that Rose's memories would return soon. The second they did, he knew there would be fireworks. Hell, there was already a fire there. He could see it in the possessive hunch of the Doctor's shoulders, the softness in the corners of his eyes and the gentle upturn of his lips as he looked at Rose.

And Rose, whose memories were completely hidden from her, truly loved him back. It was in the way she pressed closer to him, tilted her head into his hand and stood far closer to him than was probably appropriate for such a prudish race as the Time Lords. He grinned. Oh, yes. These two were headed for something amazing.

What fit the two of them so tightly together, though, was the determination in their eyes. They worked flawlessly as a team and Jack stood contentedly on the sidelines and watched. The Doctor and Rose, the Oncoming Storm and the Valiant Child, would soon save the world again. And they would do it thanklessly, but with glee and pride in a job well done. They would celebrate with a trip in which they would likely save another world, and then they would go for chips. Before long, Rose's memories would return and they would receive their reward.

Jack was brought out of his slightly gooey musings when the Doctor once again sprang into action.

"All-right then, allons-y! Let's go save the world!" he said, laughing as he grabbed his coat off the railing. Rose held on to the gadget they had been working so intently on and followed him out the door. Jack followed them, shutting the doors behind him and running up the stairs.

The cool night air greeted them. Rose closed her eyes and tried to feel what time it was here.

"Doctor, It's only two in the afternoon. Why is it dark?"

He frowned. "Whatever is creating the rips is messing with the time flow. It's moving too fast. Look at the people around us."

She glanced around the square. Everyone was moving in hyper-speed. It was as if time had sped around them and they weren't moving at all.

"Come on, guys." Jack said, starting toward the location of the first rip on the map the Doctor had given him.

Rose began to follow, but suddenly a deafening roar surrounded them. She turned to her right, where the Doctor was standing, and saw one of the terrible rips opening up before her.

The Doctor looked at her, terror in his eyes. She felt his hands push her away from him before he was sucked violently into the swirling winds of the vortex. She screamed for him, wanting to follow him through if only to stay with him, but the gap closed. Only a wave-like distortion was left before her, and when she reached out to touch it she felt cold.

A pain like she had never known before ripped through her head. The distortion was so strong, it hurt to look at. It felt as though something was trying to reach into her mind. She felt all of her memories of the Doctor begin to waver and she screamed out at the force. She felt her mind rear up in defense against the force and it began to back away. Her memories were safe, and she locked them deep inside of her as she blacked out from the pain.

OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-Oo O-OoO-OoO

The Doctor was in an endless void, the swirl of the colors around him blinding his eyes. He felt a desperation to find a way out of the place he was stuck in, thought only of Rose and how much he loved her and needed to get back to her. The look in her eyes as he was pulled away from her- he couldn't bear it. He tried to reach for his sonic screwdriver in his pocket, but he couldn't move at all.

It had been going too well. Rose was starting to remember, was falling in love with him even without remembering. He was going to find the key to unlock her memories. He was going to live forever with Rose by his side as his wife, on his newly resurrected planet. They were going to have a family, a home, a life. It couldn't end like this.

The swirling stop and he landed with a harsh thud on a hard floor. He breathed in the scent of fear and engine oil. There was quiet and noise all at once. His exhausted body sagged in relief. Wherever he was, he was somewhere. He could make it back to Rose.

A boot slammed into his head, and everything went black.

OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-OoO-Oo O-OoO-OoO-OoO

A cool hand on her forehead brought her up from the darkness.

"Rose! Rose, what's wrong? Rose!"

Jack? That was definitely Jack's voice. She opened her eyes to his worried face.

"Oh, thank God. I was worried, Rosie! Why did you just faint like that? Have you eaten today? I've been telling you for ages, you have to eat breakfast every day."

She sat up, looking around frantically for the Doctor. He had just been here.

"Where's the Doctor?" she asked softly. Jack didn't seem to hear her. It was daylight now, and the people weren't moving in hyper speed anymore. A few had stopped to look at her there on the ground, seemingly concerned. Jack continued on.

"Rose, come on, let's go get you some water. I think that's what you need." he said, trying to pull her up to her feet. She wrenched her bare wrist from his grip, offended that he would dare touch her so familiarly.

Her hand closed around something cold and cylindrical. She glanced down. The sonic! She stood and frantically began scanning the area, the wavy distortion next to her still painful to glance at.

"Jack! Where is the Doctor?" she asked, suddenly remembering the rip that had sucked him in. Her hearts dropped to her stomach and she felt sick at his reply.

"Doctor? Doctor who?"

**A/N: It's been far too long since I've posted a chapter to this, I know! I have it all mapped out now. I've just got to find the time to write all of it! I don't have a beta so it takes a while of editing to really get everything fleshed out. Thank you all for your patience (I realize this story has been in the works for almost two years!) and for continuing to read. Your reviews definitely encourage me to continue! **

**With love,**

**doctorrosetyler**


	16. Goddess of Time

Return To Memory

Chapter 16: Goddess of Time

Disclaimer: I sadly do not own Doctor Who or any of the characters.

For a moment, Rose was in a panic. Her hearts pounded, her mind spun and reached frantically for a hint of the Doctor's telepathic presence. The gap next to her was searing into her head, tears pooling in her eyes from the pain, and on top of everything else, Jack had no memory of the Doctor. She didn't know him well at all, but she knew the two of them were close enough to call each other brother.

Then why did she remember him when Jack didn't?

She thought of the Doctor, how the entirety of her existence had suddenly begun to revolve around him. She had lived without him before, all the years of her life had been fulfilling though they were devoid of excitement. Why did it suddenly feel as if everything important had just been ripped away from her?

The emptiness in her head where he should be was an ache. They hadn't even bonded and yet she was in pain because he wasn't there. He had only gone into her mind once, hadn't stayed there longer than a few minutes, but now there was a possibility it may never happen again and she couldn't live with that. She had to find him.

In that moment of determination, she flipped on her respiratory bypass. Her mind cleared as she took control over her adrenaline production and began clearing it from her blood. She blocked her senses from the pain of the rips in time and she did her best to shut down her emotions, though her love for the Doctor and desperation to get him back wasn't something she had any measure of control over.

If she was the only one that remembered he existed, then it was up to her to save him.

The gap next to her was still grating on her time sense,and she closed her eyes against the sensation. That was when it dawned on her. If the gap was only visible with her time sense, then maybe the Doctor was only visible that way as well! She had been relying on instinct, on the telepathic web of their people to reassure her that he was there. She closed her eyes, spreading out her time sense and looking for his time lines, starting with those of her own that she was sure would be twined with his. What she found surprised her.

Her own time lines were large and complex, with loops and knots and all manner of twists and turns. They spun about her in flickers of gold and she found most of them were connected with another. She felt along the strongest one she could find, and when she reached the end she felt the comforting presence of the Doctor. He was alive! She muffled her sob of relief when she began to get a location on him. He wasn't in this world, but he also wasn't in a parallel universe. He was in a place that was sort of outside of her senses. Somewhere that was telepathically shielded. He had been kidnapped and she had to find him. It was only then that she realized Jack was talking to her.

"Rose? What's going on? Who is the Doctor?" His hand was on her shoulder.

Though she had been offended before when he touched her, now she felt comfort in his presence. Something told her he was trustworthy and knew nothing of her culture and how they shied away from physical touch. She still found herself inching away from him, though, feeling the Doctor's touch the only one that was acceptable to her. She realized that Jack was still waiting for an answer.

"The Doctor? You really don't remember him at all?" she had thought that because he, too, seemed to have traveled in time, he might be immune the amnesia the gaps seemed to bring upon the loved ones of those that were captured. It seemed this was not the case.

"What are you on about, Rose? Come on, we were going to see a movie, remember? Then you just blacked out. You have to eat more often, I keep telling you. Just because you're always out hunting aliens for Torchwood doesn't mean you shouldn't take care of yourself." He said in his American accent. She gripped the sonic screwdriver tighter in her hand, gathering what strength she could from the Doctor's favorite tool.

He had mentioned hunting aliens. It may be easier to get him to believe her than she thought it would.

"Jack, just listen to me. The Doctor is practically your brother, you just lost your memories of him." she said, trying not to look at the rip in time next to her, though she was acutely aware that it was growing smaller by the second. She had to find the Doctor before the rip sealed.

Jack blinked at her. "Rosie, seriously, let's get you some food."

She stood her ground as he tried to pull her along. "No, Jack. I didn't pass out because I was hungry. I passed out because something was attacking my mind and trying to take my memories away, just like they did to you. You have to believe me. Weirder things have happened than this." She didn't know what had replaced the memories of her in his head, but she was counting on his life being crazy enough that he would believe her. He knew the Doctor, anyway.

He frowned, as if concentrating on something. "I really don't remember any Doctor, Rose. I don't know who you're talking about. It doesn't make any sense."

She took that and ran with it. "Of course it doesn't make any sense. Think about what happened today, focus on the memories. Can you remember them in any detail? Any sensory memory with it, or does it feel like you're watching a film? Do they feel real?" she asked, hoping her knowledge of memory replacement was accurate in this case.

He shook his head. "Something's not right."

She nodded. "Exactly! That's what I mean! Someone's kidnapped the Doctor right from in front of us and tried to make us forget about him! But we can't! We have to find him and stop them from doing this to anyone else." She finished, her voice shaking a bit when she thought of facing this gargantuan task without the Doctor by her side. But she was Rose Tyler, Defender of the Earth. She could handle it.

She had no memory of acquiring that title, but she knew with absolute certainty that it was accurate and that the name was very much hers.

Jack interrupted her thoughts. "Ok, then what do we do? How do we get him back?"

Rose took the map he still held crunched in his hand. She opened it up, quickly locating the first rip on the map. "We need to go here and get a reading with this," she held up the gadget she and the Doctor had perfected, "and then we can find out where the people are and how we can get to them."

Jack nodded and followed as she took off, walking straight in the direction of the first rip. It wasn't far from them, only a few blocks, but he was nearly gasping for breath by the time they reached the spot circled on the map. He looked around them, not seeing anything that would indicate something was amiss. Rose, on the other hand, was gripping her head and squinting at a spot right in front of them.

They were in an old playground, long abandoned by the children of the neighborhood. Weeds grew up around the swing set, vines twisting around the chains on the swings and a large shrub blocking the exit to the faded, plastic slide. Gravel crunched under their feet underneath the thick blanket of grass and weeds. The dying light helped little in illuminating the area and Jack couldn't help the shiver that ran down his spine. Something really wasn't right here. Wasn't this playground full of kids just last week when he and Ianto had gone for lunch?

"Rose?" he asked softly, reaching for her but deciding against it and letting his hand drop. She didn't seem to like it when he touched her. She didn't answer and he decided that perhaps now was a time for silence.

Rose couldn't look away from the blaring gap right in front of them. It was much smaller than the one they had just left, and it was closing quickly. She sensed that within a few hours it would be completely gone, and all hope of rescuing whoever had been sucked through it would be gone as well.

She glanced around at their surroundings, an old seesaw overgrown with tangled weeds.

_She pushed off the ground, squealing in delight as she was thrown up into the air and then plummeted back down onto the metal seat again. _

"_Again, mummy, again!" she giggled, looking through her blonde bangs at the woman across from her. _

_Her mum was there, laughing with her. She was younger, skinnier, with a bit less of a tired pull around her eyes. "Okay, sweetheart, but not much longer now. I've got to cook some dinner if you don't want to go to bed with a hungry tummy." _

_Rose nodded vigorously, clenching her tiny hands on the handle as she was pushed up into the air again._

Rose gasped as the vision faded. Where was the Doctor? The Doctor was always in her visions, always! Had he been in the background, and she just hadn't noticed? No, he hadn't been anywhere in that memory. What did that mean?

She set the gadget down in front of the rip and flicked it on, letting it collect its reading. It wouldn't take long. While it began to whirr and buzz, she closed her eyes. Maybe she could figure out where the Doctor was through this rip? Behind her eyes, she found the same timeline from before and began to follow it, pulling the wispy tendrils of time through her fingers until she reached the spot where she had found the Doctor before.

He was still there, but he was fading. The comfort of his presence did little to dull the panic at the realization that he didn't have much time. In the span of only a few minutes- a half an hour at the most, his presence in time had diminished tenfold. She couldn't let it go on much longer.

Her hearts clenched and her mind reeled. The machine at her feet pinged out its finished reading and she fell to her knees beside it. She tried to open her eyes, to grab the machine and continue on to the next destination, but all she could see was gold. It swirled through her vision like autumn leaves in a zephyr, so thick and full of power that she was nearly caught up in the storm. The remnants of the Doctors time at the edge of her consciousness kept her from being wrapped up in it.

She took deep, steadying breaths. She could hear Jack calling for her, but she ignored him for now. She didn't know what was happening to her, but she may be able to use it to find the Doctor. Something was rising up inside of her, she felt it building in her chest and begging to escape. The wind in her eyes swirled through her mind, a howling deep and melancholy, bringing with it an unspoken power that left her trembling in its wake.

Her body was no longer tired. Her mind was clear in its purpose and she knew what she had to do. Her vision changed from the solid, churning gold to a pattern of waves. She wasn't looking at the world anymore, but its time. She could see the lives of all the living things in front of her, feel the steps people took over each patch of grass. The world breathed with time and she could sense the call of the vortex. The rip stood before her like a gaping maw, a scar of darkness in a sea of warm gold. She could feel her Doctor's time mixed into her own and she held onto it with a strength she didn't know she had, strengthening his timelines with her own.

Jack shook as he heard the howl erupt in his mind and watched as his friend's eyes turned to liquid pools of churning gold. He'd seen this before, in his dreams. He was dead and she raised her hand and he was alive again.

Memories came rushing back into his head, the Doctor, Rose, what had happened to her and everything that led up to that moment as he stood shivering before her power in an abandoned park.

Bad Wolf.

"Jack. The next rip. I can see it there, just over the next hill." She spoke, but her voice chimed with the voice of the Vortex. How long could she hold onto this power and not burn like she had the last time? He didn't have long to think about it, as she began to run towards the next rip, faster than he had ever seen her. He grabbed the device she had put at his feet and he ran to catch up with her.

She ran through the streets of Cardiff, Jack in tow. They had about fifteen minutes to get the readings from the other six rips, or she would never see the Doctor again.

She was the Bad Wolf, Goddess of Time, and protector of the Doctor. But even she could only sustain his timelines for so long.

**A/N: So, what did you think? It's been a while since I have updated, I know. I'm sorry for the long wait! I assure that I am most certainly not abandoning this story now! I have the remaining chapters planned out, and I am working on getting it down as soon as possible. Thank you all for your overwhelming support as I continue to write!**

**Much love, **

**doctorrosetyler**


	17. For the Love of a Time Lord

Return to Memory

Chapter 17: For the Love of a Time Lord

The second rip was only somewhat larger than the first, still a gaping black hole against the new sea of gold in which Rose now judged her position in the universe. It was strange, this new view of the world around her. The senses she had relied on her whole life were suddenly useless, dulled against the bright lights and the song of time in her ears. Instead she used these new senses, ones she never knew she had. She knew she should be alarmed at her situation, but all she could think of was getting the Doctor back. She felt that Jack was catching up with her, his footsteps behind her shadows against the gold. The machine in her hand pinged that the scan was finished and she reached out her senses for the next rip. Before Jack had the chance to catch his breath, she was off again, the gold rising up to speed her along her way. She could feel the TARDIS singing to her, telling her where to go and to be careful on her journey.

There were only twelve minutes left.

The Doctor's timelines were fading still, and she grabbed onto as many as she could with her consciousness, trying to strengthen them and keep the rift open so that she could still find him. A gentle ping signaled her to run once more.

Jack continued to chase Rose through the streets as she ran to the fourth rip. Something was horribly wrong with her. She wouldn't speak to him, her eyes continued to swirl gold, and she seemed to not see anything around her. Cars whooshed past her, missing by mere inches, and she didn't even flinch. Her feet moved with an unbelievable speed, and he now noted that she had long ago lost her shoes. Occasionally she would reach out in front of her, seemingly grabbing at something, and a flash of gold would appear around her hand. He couldn't keep up with her and he worried that even the Doctor would not be able to fix her when they found him.

If they found him.

It had been so long since she had uttered a sound that it startled him when she spoke. "Jack, we don't have much time. We still have two more and we have to make it back to the TARDIS. I don't know what will happen. Just promise me that you will find the Doctor and keep him safe, even if I cannot." as she spoke her voice trembled and shook with raw power. Something inside of him shook with fear.

"Rose, it'll be ok. I promise I'll find the Doctor but I have to look out for you, too."

The machine pinged again and they took off for the fifth rip. Though they were running at top speed, her voice was as steady as it was when they were standing still. "I can't see, Jack. I don't know what is happening to me but I know I won't be able to hold it in for long. I can feel it trying to burn me. I don't know what's holding it back." As she spoke the ache in her head became a bit more pronounced. She wasn't going to be able to keep this up much longer. She only hoped that it would work itself out soon. It would kill the Doctor if she were to die trying to save him.

The final two gaps were fortunately very close together. The machine buzzed the final readings and Rose ran to where they had parked the TARDIS just a few happy hours ago. Her heart ached at the thought that she may never experience the joy of flight to an unknown planet with her Doctor again. She tried to figure out how much time they had, reaching out to the Doctor's timelines, but her mind was getting hazier and she couldn't make out anything.

All of a sudden, the gold disappeared. The world around diffused back into color, both brilliant and dull to her eyes after the swirling sea of time she had been seeing. Her head felt fine, but she felt a weariness in her bones. She looked up at Jack's words, only now realizing that they were back at the TARDIS, her hand on the open door.

"Oh, Rosie, thank God. I thought you were going to be like that forever." Jack said, panting for breath as they entered the TARDIS. Though Rose was no longer infused with the golden power, she still moved with speed and purpose toward the TARDIS console.

It was then that she realized she had no idea what to do. She held the machine in her hands, its whirring and buzzing the only sound other than Jack's rapid breaths. She knew, however, that she couldn't panic. That would only waste their precious time. Running her hand gently along the coral strut, she spoke softly to the TARDIS as she had seen her Doctor do.

"Please, old girl. I need to find him but I have no idea what I'm supposed to do. I know you know how to get to him. What do I do?" A warmth suffused her hand and she heard a beep from the monitor. On the screen were step by step instructions as to how to hook up the whirring device in her hands. She quickly followed the steps, afterwards taking the driving position she had seen the Doctor take on their trips together.

She felt a tickle along her senses, a sort of telepathic handshake. It was the TARDIS. Knowing she needed desperately to communicate with the ship in order to fly her, she opened her mind and welcomed her in. A golden song infused her once more, her hands going automatically to the right place on the console, flipping levers and turning dials until the great rotor began its otherworldly grind. She could feel the push and pull of the vortex, the never-ending power of time itself, weaving its way through space to the tiny pocket that housed the unknown. Though her stomach was a ball of nerves, she knew she must go there. It was the only way to get to the Doctor.

The engines changed their pitch as the ship exited the vortex. She was surprised, however, when the TARDIS engines didn't wheeze and grind as they landed. She materialized quietly in the corner of what appeared to be a cavernous control room. Two men sat at the pilot's chairs, both of them seemingly unaware of the ship that just landed behind them. Rose looked down at her attire, and wondered if she should be dressed a bit more threateningly. She had the Doctor's sonic screwdriver in her pocket, and the key necklace she used to wear was there too, warm and thrumming as it always was when she was in the TARDIS. Jack remained silent beside her as she approached the doors. This was it.

The doors didn't even creak as she and Jack exited the ship. Her footsteps were quiet in her trainers and she doubted the men had any idea there was anyone there. Thinking quickly, she shut the TARDIS door and made sure it was locked before grabbing what appeared to be a sonic blaster off of a nearby table. She pointed it at the men and spoke in her most threatening voice.

"Where have you taken the Doctor?"

The men jumped up, one of them spilling his drink all over the controls of the ship. The console sparked angrily and the acrid smell of electricity filled the room. They were more concerned, however, with the sudden intruders. The taller man, whom Rose decided to call Goony, spoke first.

"How the hell did you get in here?" he took a step forward, but Rose flipped what she presumed to be the safety on the gun, the click making him pause.

Rose smirked. "I made a call."

Jack, who had followed her lead and grabbed a gun from the table as well, pointed his weapon at the smaller man, whom Rose decided to call Loony. "Tell us what you have done with our friend."

Goony laughed. "I don't know of any "Doctor," we keep only livestock on this ship." The way he emphasized the word livestock made Rose shiver.

Jack gave the men's attire a once over. "Time agent gear, I see. Standard issue from the 52nd century. I'd say about two years before I was recruited. I wonder whatever happened to you to not have made it to my time." He said with a smirk. Loony didn't particularly like that.

"We are done with that life. Those idiots don't know what to do with the resources we have available to us." Goony said, with a disconcerting smirk on his face.

Rose glared at him. "What exactly did you mean when you said "livestock?"

Loony laughed. "As if we're going to tell you. You're standing there trying to be all threatening, but you're forgetting something. You're on our ship. There's nowhere for you to run, and no one to hear you scream."

Rose was about to respond to that, anger welling up in her throat, when Jack interrupted.

"A 63rd century counter-exchanger. I didn't expect to see one of those ever again. So what are you doing to the people you kidnapped? What are you using them for?" his voice was even and calm, though Rose could somehow tell that he was very, very worried for the Doctor now.

Goony glared at him. "You people at the Time Agency don't know the resources you're ignoring. The things we could do with the power of time travel! These useless idiots here in the past, they don't know anything. The only thing they are good for is producing delta waves and storing huon energy."

Jack squared his shoulders and Rose could hear distinct rage in his tone, though he hid it well. "These people aren't good for storing huon energy at all. It is a parasite to them because they've not grown up around it. If you keep using them to farm energy, they will all die."

Loony turned and flipped a few dials on the console. It apparently still worked even though it was soaked. "That's why they're useful. They feed the energy and make it more powerful. We aren't even hurting anyone. We used a time pocket. Nobody even knows they are here."

Rose was furious at that. "They know they're here! They suffer and die and it makes a difference to them! Why would you do this?"

Goony rolled his eyes. "So sensitive, you early humans. You must be from this century, little girl, your mind is so small." Rose bristled. She was a Gallifreyan. Her mind was not small in the least. "The energy we can farm from them with the fed huon particles could power timeships faster and stronger than any in the universe. We can build a ship that will last for centuries, repair itself, even form a sort of sentience."

Her voice was steady, but her knees shook as she replied, feeling the Doctor's presence in her mind but knowing he was very weak. She needed to find him now. "There are already ships like that. It's called a TARDIS. Whatever TARDISes you built like that, though, would be evil. They would be capable only of raining destruction and pain across time and space. I know for sure there are forces that would not stand for it."

Jack stepped forward with his blaster still carefully aimed. "Fortunately for you, we're not here to stop you. We just want the Doctor back. Give him to us, and we'll let you go."

Rose looked at him in surprise. "We will?"

Goony and Loony took that moment of distraction and used it to their advantage. Before she could blink, Rose was on the ground with her hands tied behind her back. Jack was in a similar position. She knew that she was caught, but her own well being was not her main concern.

"Where is the Doctor! At least let me see the Doctor!" she cried, losing her calm exterior for a moment.

Goony laughed. "He is dead. You are too late."

Rose could feel in her mind that the Doctor was still alive, though he was growing weak. Her panic subsided, however, and she began to form a plan. These men thought she was a weak human. What better way to slip under their radar than to have them grossly underestimate her? With that thought, she went limp and allowed a cry of grief escape her mouth. On the outside, she appeared to be an inconsolable, sobbing mess of a woman. On the inside, however, she was scheming.

Loony and Goony dragged them down the hallway, Rose crying loudly and Jack struggling all the way. Jack continued to cry out to her. "Rosie! Why are you just letting them do this! What's wrong with you? You're stronger than this!" She would just have to tell him her plan when the two were gone.

She heard the rattle of a cell door and felt the cold steel of the floor on her body as she was roughly tossed inside. She heard Jack meet the same fate right next to her. The door slammed shut quickly and she heard the two men walk away, their boots echoing on the metal floor of the ship. She felt the energy beginning to leave her. This must be the cells they use to drain people of their energy. The Doctor was likely in one of these cells, and was likely quite weak from being locked in for so long. She crawled to the wall that she knew Jack was on the opposite side of.

"Jack! I'm going to try to escape. I need to find the Doctor and get him out of here." she whispered loudly. She heard him breathe a sigh of relief.

"Oh Rosie, thank goodness. I thought you'd given up on me."

She stood and went over to the door, quickly devising a way to break the hinges with the sonic screwdriver. "I'll never give up on getting to the Doctor. As long as there is breath in my body, I will find him." The door fell from its hinges with a thud and she carefully lowered it to the ground, listening for any sign that Loony and Goony had heard the sound. When she deemed it was safe, she quickly bade Jack good luck and ran down the hallway in search of the Doctor.

A/N: I know it has been like over a year since I have updated this story. I have no excuse for this! You readers are the most loyal, amazing people in the universe and I'm so sorry this update took so long! I'll do my best to update more frequently and to finish this story!

With love,

doctorrosetyler


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